You're probably here because you suspect that he is cheating on you?
Are you worried about the suspicious behavior of your boyfriend or husband?
Are you losing endless hours of sleep due to the sadness and uncertainty as to what is going on in your relationship?
If so, then it's super important you find out what is going on so that you can get your life back...
It's July 2020 already and it's about time you figure out what's going on in your relationship so you don't waste any more time.
The first thing you will want to do is actually rule out that he's seeing someone else right now and cheating on you.
Even if he says he isn't, he's may be covering it up so it's extremely important that you investigate a little further to make sure that he isn't.
A great way to rule this out is by using an online tool like this (click here to check it out).
Just enter his name and details and this tool will show you any secret dating profiles he has, who he's frequently communicating with online, and a bunch of other info which will allow you to draw your own conclusions as to whether he may be cheating on you or not.
It turns out that some women even discovered that the man they had been dating for years was already married.
How crazy is that?
Of course, it's not what you hope in your case, but you should rule it out nonetheless - and the most effective way is with this tool.
Once you've ruled that out, it's time to dig a little deeper.
Let's investigate some other potential signs that he may be cheating.
1. Lipstick On His Collar
There may be an honest reason why there is lipstick on his clothes from the night before such as some drunk woman throwing herself on him but that’s rare so if you find lipstick or makeup on his shirt it’s worth questioning him about it.
Make sure that the lipstick or makeup is 100% not your own first though as making a false accusation could damage your relationship.
2. Longer Working Days
If all of a sudden your guy is working longer days and doing a lot of overtime then it may be worth investigating as he very well could be spending those hours with another woman.
3. He’s Not Present
Even when your guy is with you at home or out on a date, he can still not be present and be with you. This means that even when he is sitting next to you at home or having dinner, he is in his own little world and hardly noticing you are there.
Saying this however, when it’s a sport day and my husband’s team is playing, I can ask him a question about something and be completely ignored as if I don’t even exist. I always tell him it’s like talking to a brick wall sometimes when the football is on.
4. He’s Starting To Dress Better
Another major tell-tale red flag that your man may be cheating on you is if he is starting to make more of an effort with the way he is dressing. For example, if he usually goes to work in an old suit and bed hair but then all of a sudden starts going to work in top quality suits, his hair neatly gelled back and expensive cuff links then it is time to start wondering.
There could very well be an honest reason for your man dressing better for work though such as if he has received a promotion or if a promotion is coming up and he wants to be picked. If there is nothing happening with his work though and he starts dressing better than it is certainly behavior that is worth investigating.
5. Enthusiastic About A New Colleague
I will go back to my friend who was having an affair with one of her colleagues for this one. I remember me and my husband going to a wedding where my friend and her partner were also in attendance. As the night went on, I noticed a few times that my friend kept bringing up conversation about her ‘friend’ at work and how she done this and done that. I wonder whether her partner ever had a feeling that she was having an affair.
It’s a sad thing when you feel you aren't being noticed by your man anymore. This could be a sign that he didn't notice your new haircut or that you have lost weight. If your man has always been one not to notice these things then it doesn't mean he is having an affair. For example, I was watching one of the old Home Improvements episodes the other day where Jill had gotten an entirely new haircut and Tim, her husband, didn't even notice but he wasn't having an affair.
7. Hints From Family And Friends
When my friend was cheating on her partner, I had only ever met her partner once and so there was never a chance for hints of cheating. If you start noticing your friends or family having awkward silences when talking about how much you love your man or when they laugh awkwardly when you joke about him cheating, then they might know something you don’t.
8. Your Intuition
Sometimes you just have to follow your gut instinct; you can’t pinpoint what it is that makes you feel that your man is cheating but you just have a gut instinct that he is. If you can easily become the green eye monster and have ruined relationships in the past because of false accusations and constant jealousy then you need to start building your self-esteem and trust levels.
9. His Accusations
One of the defenses cheaters use is accusation attacks on you to make you feel that you’re in the wrong. If you are sure that your man is cheating and have asked about it and responds by accusing you of being crazy or jealous then it doesn't mean that you are as technically he hasn't answered your question.
If your man really hasn't cheated on you then he should be hurt that you would think that and not defensive and accuse you being jealous. He might have a very good and honest as to why he has a cleared his text messages and calls such as having full storage buy you won’t know if you don’t ask.
10. Offering To Show You His Texts And Emails
This may sound like a strange one but it is actually a good telling sign that your man may be cheating. It is easy to clear all text messages and calls from your phone and even now delete specific text message and calls but for some reason, cheating men don’t think that we women know about this.
If your man offers to show you his phone but refuses to show you his phone bill then that should certainly be setting off alarm bells.
11. Being Overly Nice
If you notice that your man is being overly nice to your recently the he very well could be cheating. He could randomly start buying you flowers, chocolates, jewelry or taking you out more. While you may be enjoying all these gifts, if it isn't something he usually does then it might raise alarm bells.
12. Constantly Picking Faults
While I have mentioned about men who cheat which suddenly start becoming overly nice, it could actually be the polar opposite in other men. Some men very well start becoming overly picky by constantly picking out your faults no matter how small or big. It could be something as silly as you putting a fork in the drawer the wrong way or you eating crisps too loudly, or it could be something bigger.
13. He Has Unpredictable Mood Swings
One the biggest signs that a man is cheating on you is that he has unpredictable mood swings such as from going from happy to all of a sudden explosively angry or from acting normal and suddenly starts being overly nice. If you notice that the smallest of things set him off or that he is acting very differently lately then unfortunately it could mean bad news.
It was actually my friend who told me of this sign as she said looking back, after finding out her boyfriend was cheating, she remembered that he would sometimes start the most strangest of fights with her and would storm out of the hours and not come back for hours. She now thinks that he caused those fights on purpose so he could get away when he ran out of all other excuses.
14. His Quick Change In Weight And Appearance
When me and my husband first started dating or at the early stages of our relationship, his physique was very much chiselled and he was very much into his designer clothing. As time has gone on, he still goes to the gym and is in good shape however not so chiselled as before. He will also hang out in his sweats and sometimes goes days before shaving. I also know that he doesn’t wear aftershave when he goes the shops or out and about. Because I know all this, I would find it shady if one day he started going to the 'shops’ with a clean shaven face, his best clothes and aftershave.
15. Change In Tastes Overnight
While there is nothing wrong in trying something new, it is a bit worrying if your man start playing jazz music because he says there is a woman in work who said it was really good and now he thinks it’s really good. This means he is interested in that woman and wants to have something in common with her or admires her tastes so much so that he wants to have the same tastes so as to impress her.
16. His Story Changes
One of the biggest tell-tale signs that your man is cheating is if his story about a recent weekend away, night out with the lads or trip to the shops has changed. For example, your man may have come back from a weekend away and said he stayed in a triple room with friends but later slips up about the double bed being uncomfortable when he told you earlier it was three single beds. This is a sure sign of shadiness and should certainly start set your alarm bells ringing.
17. He Now Needs A Lot More Privacy Than He Did Before
If you notice your man is starting to need a lot more privacy lately he might be up to something which I know you don’t want to think about but it may be worth looking into without getting too obsessive. For example, if you notice that your man is spending much more time in another room than usual then it could be possible that he is chatting online or texting with his mistress.
18. There Is Change In His Sexual Appetite
This doesn't mean whether there is more or less sex, this means if his sexual tastes have changed out of the blue. For example, he has always liked it when you are on top but then suddenly decides he doesn't like this anymore, or during one session he starts talking crudely to you which he has never done before. Whatever the sudden change is, it may be worth asking after why. Ask this casually though so that you can see his honest response. If he gets slightly defensive or looks a bit panicky then it could be cause for concern.
19. He Is Being Secretive About His Financial History
If you normally share everything financially or if you don’t share everything but he is usually open about his finances and suddenly very secretive about it then he could be spending money on another woman. Bank statements don’t just have to have hotel names on to prove he is cheating, he could have set up a PayPal account or another bank account to transfer money to. In this case, you may notice large sums of money being transferred regularly to the same bank account.
20. He Is Being Secretive With His Phone
Another one of the biggest signs of a cheater is when he is being overly secretive about his phone lately. Sometimes I ask my husband if I can use his iPhone so I can set the timer for the pasta when my phone is upstairs or if I need to print something because it doesn't seem to work from my phone. My husband never has a problem with the small requests so if one day he said no or got angry with me then I would know it is strange and shady behavior which would I would have concern about.
21. You’ve Stopped Having Sex
I have spoken about him having sudden changes in sexual tastes but another sign of him cheating is if the sex stops completely or significantly reduces. If your man is already satisfied, he won’t need to be satisfied when he is at home with you. If however, you have been in a relationship for quite some time then the sex can naturally dry up so the concern may not be as strong as someone who has sex regularly.
22. He’s All Of A Sudden Jealous
You may have already heard of this one before, I know I've heard it quite a few times but whether you have or your haven’t it should definitely still be placed on this list. It is a strange thing but very common that men (and even women) will act extremely jealous when it is actually them who is cheating. This is because they know they are cheating and start to wonder whether you are doing the same.
23. Neither Of You Are Happy
This is probably a red flag and you may want to sit down and talk about how you can both be happy in the relationship or that it is time to walk away. If you are both unhappy then it may be motivation for him to find happiness elsewhere. If this is a relationship that when asking yourself you are not happy with then you may just want to walk away anyway.
24. He Over Explains Things
If you notice your man goes into far too many details when explaining things then it could be a worry. If it is something he usually does and has always done then of course there shouldn't be anything to worry about. If it is a new development then it is time you start finding out why.
25. He’s Always Defensive
If you ask a simple, relevant and reasonable question such as “where were you last night, I text to say goodnight but never got a reply” and he goes defensive and maybe even aggressive then something isn't right. I know my husband is hopeless with his phone when he goes out with friends once in a blue moon and when I ask where he was, he never gets defensive… he just answers the question. If one day though I ask where he was and he gets defensive and starts accusing me of being controlling then I know something would be wrong.
26. His Body Language Has Changed
This may seem like a strange one but it can certainly go a long way in telling you whether you man has changed the way he feels about you and even whether he thinking about someone else. This is a sign more for those who have been with their men for quite some time and have come to learn his body language through and through.
27. He Is Suddenly Meticulously Clean
If your boyfriend never usually cleans his car all of the time or doesn't really bother with his apartment but now suddenly his apartment is always spectacularly clean and he is out cleaning his car all of the time, then he may very well be cleaning it for another woman or hiding the evidence.
28. Perfume On His Clothing… That Isn’t Yours
If when doing the laundry one day you notice that his shirts or clothing have a distinct scent of perfume that you know isn’t yours, could very well mean he is having an affair. This sign is right up there with the lipstick on the color as in there is hardly any excuse that led to that perfume being on his clothing.
Some of the red flags mentioned above may not mean that your man is 100% cheating on you and may mean that he is actually going through a rough time and is hiding it from you by carrying the burden himself. It could be that he has lost his job but doesn't want you to worry and so he is carrying the burden himself and pretending to go to work each day. This will inevitably lead to him taking on the same traits as those who are cheating.
I have mentioned it over and over again throughout this blog post as it is very important. Do not make accusations without backing it up with sufficient evidence as if you are wrong, it could cause damage to your relationship.
The cheating signs are straightforward to spot in guys and girls alike. With guys, they tend to care about their appearance more than usual, they avoid intimacy with you, often claiming to be very busy with work when there's nothing to do.
If you're not able to read body language to decipher if your partner is cheating, there are other ways to find out. One way is via their friends or your friends that know them. Also, pay extra attention to their social media use and the sound of their voice when talking to others. The last step is to look out for any weird behavior, which might suggest shifted interests.
Love is a very tricky thing, in that one can be in love with more than one person at a time. This is why many people end up cheating on their partners. Our romantic thoughts can switch from one person to another in a second, intentionally or unintentionally.
Cheating affects both parties, the person who cheats, and the one being cheated on. Men especially get concerned when they're cheated on. Some end up feeling insecure about themselves, and as such, they have an anxious attachment to their partner. Such instances can break them and affect how they love or trust.
Trusting someone who's cheated on you before can be very tough. These people often give an excellent reason why they behaved the way they did, even when the reason Is flimsy. Trusting such a person again will require some amount of counseling or therapy involving both parties and a professional relationship expert. Regaining trust can only work if both parties are willing to work at it.