There’s been a lot of research and theories about the differences and similarities average boys and girls share. But we don’t quite explore enough how these things affect the way the genders relate.
For instance, there are questions girls are afraid to ask guys, and I’m pretty sure it’s the same the other way round. Although there is something to be said for the latter group and their seemingly innate ability to remain a mystery to the female folk.
Each side’s attempts at fully understanding the other are often stifled by manners and other inhibiting factors that won’t let us ask the hard questions. Specifically, we ladies enjoy the occasional tease, but we usually steer clear of certain inquiries because most of us don’t want to be improper.
That, and we are tired of hearing answers that seem to come from a collective conscience because guys don’t usually volunteer the real ones. Having said that, here are some of the questions curious girls like myself have had about their male counterparts but are usually too chicken to ask them.
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We hear some of the things these guys want to do with our girls in secret sometimes and can’t help but wonder, what’s all the fuss about? Do boys really love the girls that much, or do they just act like they do because other boys do?
While we are on the subject, girls (read: I) would also like to ask guys if it pays extra to play with boobs during sex? Or, is the fascination just really about the aesthetics and the fact that they don’t have them?
This one tops the list of questions girls ask guys (or want to at least) about their lady bits. Everyone’s girlfriend smells and tastes like strawberry and vanilla when asked, but some men forget a girl has taste buds too.
Given our (natural) smell and taste down, there isn’t always ‘sweet,’ as in food. We want to know if the fellas enjoy going down on us as much as they claim to, or they just pretend to for their girls’ pleasure?
A good one, at least. What makes it good even? Do mouths feel different; is it a flesh thing or a warmth thing or both? I get the sense this particular question is how guys feel about all things boobs. We are so fascinated by it because we can’t experience it like them for the simple reason we don’t have a third leg with a thing for dark, warm, moist places.
In the same vein, what does it feel like to be on the guys’ end of the business amid the deed? Like, can they tell the difference between a woman’s warm, moist place, or do they all feel the same once they are in? We can recognize a certain familiar, pulsating member in the dark. Do we leave such an impression too once they’ve been inside us?
I mean, it’s the woke generation and all, but we all know human wirings are hard to change. Many guys these days try to convince the girls they meet they are more open-minded than most and wouldn’t judge a lady for following her instincts. But we also know the gender that would say anything if it helps their chances of getting laid.
So, on behalf of girls, again, I ask, what’s a guy’s honest thoughts on a girl who has sex on the first date?
An average guy talks a big game about girls taking more active roles in a relationship instead of expecting them to make the first move all the time. But is this only about initiating sex, or does it apply to us expressing our feelings too? I understand a guy might see it as being railroaded if a girl says the L-word first, hence the hesitation to do it or even ask.
And I don’t mean masturbation. It bothers me and many girls, I’m sure, that this gender can’t seem to do without fiddling with his member? Those prone to this habit are like toddlers with a new toy. Plaything I get, but since it’s literally been there all their lives, we can rule out the newness, so what exactly is the deal here?
Girls hear stories all the time about a poor guy and his most recent mishap in the form of an unwanted boner. Like in the middle of work doing the most unattractive thing, or in front of a whole class with exactly zero prompt. Morning wood, we get, kind of.
But I guess what we want to know is, are these incidents really unwanted or more an unexpected reaction to actions or situations they’d never admit to finding sexually stimulating?
I can think of multiple likely answers to this question off the top of my head, but does that mean I still wouldn’t like to hear it from guys? Not at all. I get that girls ghost, too; especially with the bar for what passes for a relationship nowadays being in the mud. But I don’t need statistics to know which gender does it more, so why so often, guys?
I think anyone who doesn’t find piercings hot has something yet to discover in terms of taste, but I may be biased. A better way to put the questions girls want to really ask guys is that sexual connotation aside, does sporting multiple piercings make a guy see a girl differently?
It’s no secret that girls have a knack for looking our best, while guys are… generally less concerned in that area. It’s usually no trouble until a stylish girl finds love in a fashion-hopeless dude, which she might find refreshing at first, but then the novelty wears off, and it just becomes annoying.
Every girl who’s ever been with a guy like this has thought of asking him to do better in the wardrobe department, but it’s not easy.
Like what do they really think about a serious relationship with a bisexual girl? Many of them make it seem like bi girls are the perfect finds in the dating scene, but that might have more to do with seeing them as threesome bait.
Also, does it bother boys that their bi girlfriend might know more about pleasing a girl than they do? These are questions girls genuinely want to ask, or is it just me?
We’ve heard of guys being intimidated by high-earning and more powerful women than themselves, and it makes one wonder, does superior sexual experience make them feel emasculated too? Is that what birthed the obsession with girls’ body count? Girls don’t make a fuss about a guy being more sexually-experienced, why is it so different the other way round?
Another question an average girl might be afraid to ask guys is when it would be okay to unveil her inner sex goddess? Everyone is open-minded until they aren’t. So on behalf of every girl who has had to censor her fantasies, I ask, when does it please the gents, to tell the truth without consequences?
What even happens at these things, besides pizza, booze, and catching up on sports? Because that can’t be what’s so important, they can’t afford to miss one weekend. Is it the occasional strip club, and is it really more fun to go with guy friends than their girlfriend? Do they ever like, think, “I miss my girl, let me ditch the boys this one time and go to her” instead? I wonder.
Sports are the numero dos contender with girls for boys’ hearts, after fellow women. They get so engrossed in it sometimes that one shudders to imagine the consequences of asking them to choose between one and you.
They hole up in their mancave watching it, it’s all they ever tweet about, and apparently, it’s a hot topic between guy friends at boys’ night out as well. So, what exactly is it about it that’s so thrilling about football?
I don’t know what we fear more about this particular question, that a guy might say he doesn’t or that he does. We know friends talk, so even if they won’t tell everyone willing to listen, there’s always a wingman who knows more than he should.
Yet, we are usually afraid of asking because then he’d say no, and you’ll never be truly convinced he isn’t lying. And if he says no, it’s practically a confirmation that a woman’s secrets aren’t safe with guys, you get the dilemma.
Men swear they love feeling useful, like acts of service is their universal love language or something. In a relationship, the guy is more comfortable when he’s able to help his girl out, whether physically, emotionally, or financially.
Outside relationships, we see these chivalrous gestures around us every day. So, is it really satisfying to do all those things or more a courtesy thing?
I know, on some level, boys love a good show-off. They want to flaunt their arm candy, whether it’s a girl they just started dating or have been in a relationship with for a while. However, given how protective and prone to jealousy they are, I can’t help but wonder how it must feel to have other fellas practically ogling her while they watch?
Boys insist keeping it platonic with female friends is totally doable until the tables turn and it’s their girlfriend with the guy friends. So, um, is there something boys aren’t telling us about their cross-sex friendships that gets them on edge when it’s their turn or are we tripping?
Even more unsettling than your boyfriend being on edge about you having a male friend is an idea of him rubbing one out to the thought of your bestie. They may not all act on it, but a typical guy in a relationship has a spank bank full of images of him doing inappropriate things with his girl’s close female friends.
Call it a hunch from a gender who knows a thing or two about forbidden fruits.
When a woman asks a guy if they think a girl is hot, it’s not because women are blind and can’t see for themselves that she is indeed smoldering. Yes, it’s an attempt at mind games sometimes, but that doesn’t mean women are always testing guys, right?
Well, I don’t think they believe that because how else do you explain that no guy in a relationship ever gives a straight answer, no matter how often it comes up?
The debate on makeup or no makeup has been around for some time. Yet, sometimes women find the generalized answers are not good enough for them but are afraid to ask guys the real one on their minds: thoughts on their makeup.
Like clockwork, a girl dolls up, and her man says she looks beautiful but does she, really? Like in his eyes, does she look better with the makeup or without? If the guy’s vote counted, would it be in support of what the girl already does or be completely against?
Another top question girls ask or wish to ask guys is on the matter of shaving. Some men prefer the area with a neatly trimmed bush, others say they don’t mind it thicker as long as it’s clean.
Now the question is, does it really take being unkempt or shaved completely for guys to mind the presence (or lack) of pubic hair? And if so, what thoughts go through their minds when they give head to an unshaven lady on, say, the first date?
What’s a boy vs. girl conversation without mentioning turn-offs? So, where do guys really stand on period sex? From what I gather, it appears women fret more over it than these fellas do, but it could easily be one of those things boys lie about for reasons best known to them.
Many girls are convinced that having noticeable belly fat cuts down their sexiness by at least half. And honestly, I don’t blame them because of the culture we have been perpetuating for god-knows-how-long about body types that pass for hot.
It’s why the belly always finds its way into every conversation about turn-offs and why women are usually not eager to bring it up with their guys.
‘Kissing and telling’ has been like a personality trait of immature boys since time immemorial. Unlike girls, who tell their friends stuff out of habit or another genuine reason, guys who kiss and tell do it for less dignified reasons. Often with girls, they are not actively seeing.
We know that communication is key to all things intimacy, yet we are usually afraid to ask because we girls prefer not to offend. Plus, would someone with such a state of mind admit to it?
No one does targeted advertising better than a girl with a crush. All that time we spend on picking the perfect selfies to post isn’t because we all have a perfectionist personality. The same goes for the videos, quotes, and even parties we throw and attend. It’s a modern dating term called gatsbying, and a lot of us are guilty of it.
Being quite proficient in the act myself, I can recognize gatsbying from a mile away, and that’s why I’m mostly afraid to ask, can guys do too?
We know guys love our girls, but is the size issue as profound for them as it is for us? Like many men know better than to say things that would make a girl feel bad about her cups. But when they say they don’t care, do they mean it like we do when we say their size doesn’t matter? We’d totally understand if it does, but it still doesn’t mean we’d love to hear it.
Some guys have absolutely no issue going Dutch, but there are also the old-fashioned guys who apparently can’t stomach the idea of sharing the bills with a lady. Some women like being taken care of, and men like to say they are happy to do it, but how does one tell who is who on, like, the first date?
The safest play is to always offer to pay, of course. But is there a consensus on where guys generally lean so we can all save ourselves the gross inconvenience of those awkward first few seconds?
Have you noticed how so many of the questions girls are afraid to ask guys pop up in relationships, too? Yes, the best ones prioritize healthy communication, but even happy couples don’t always share everything with their significant other. Compared to some others, though, this one actually makes sense.
A lie won’t do, and the truth (which is usually what we’ve been suspecting) isn’t any easier to hear, so we, um, don’t ask.
Almost, if not every girl that has ever been in a long-term relationship with a guy has asked herself this question, is he bored yet, will he? Especially when the honeymoon phase is over, and the sight of you in lingerie doesn’t make him ‘misbehave’ anymore.
Now, usually, at this point, the relationship has grown past just the sex into something more meaningful. Yet, we can’t help but wonder, even if it feels weird to ask, does he miss the feel of new vag, and would he tell me if he did?
Girls know there’s no singular answer to this, that guys don’t have a collective personality and like all of the same things and stuff. Yet, when a girl likes a guy, she finds herself wanting to know, so she can use the information to her advantage or cry her eyes out if it’s not her jam. It’s just the way it goes, and we know how it sounds is why we don’t like to ask.
What do guys want to do when they go on a date? Would this particular one want to talk, play and unwind or skip right to sex? Believe it or not, even the most seasoned daters struggle with this sometimes, especially for the first few dates.
This, of course, is just one in the long list of things we overthink when we really want to be with someone that almost always turns out unnecessary.
I really can’t explain the obsession with this age-old question, but girls lowkey want to know who their man loves more between them and his mom. We realize it’s not the same and all, but it’s like if you had to put a number on it, who would score higher?
Here is a close one to the above as we all know how attached guys can get to their finances. So you claim to love a lady more than anything in the world, but if it came down to a one or situation, who would have to go from your life? Funds or the tender love of a beautiful woman? It’s fun and games until he chooses the green.
We know guys hate it when a girl tries to get all up in their money business. It's not that we particularly enjoy doing it too, we just tend to care too much to look the other way when we sense the man we like is in financial trouble.
Anyway, the male folk does not look kindly on girls who try to sniff out their worth, and that's why we hate to ask money questions, even if our intentions are good.
Yep, it’s straight out of Lana Del Ray’s mouth, and even though we are all singing along when the song comes on, it’s a little harder to ask the question. No one wants to come across as insecure, but many women can’t help thinking it when they fall for a guy who can’t stop going on about how gorgeous they look.
Another one of the questions girls are afraid to ask guys because no answer really gives us the peace of mind they seek: ‘How to tell when he’s over me’. The best of men respect women too much to say hurtful things lightly. If a lady is lucky enough to be with such a guy, diplomatic communication comes with the territory, which means he most likely won’t tell her.
And if a girl is dating a guy who doesn’t care enough to sugarcoat things, it doesn’t really help to know either. So women are not afraid to ask this question. The fear sets at the moment the thought starts to brew.
Like straight-out loosen your tie, unbutton your shirt, fold your sleeves and brawl in public type fights, or emotional warfare as the case may demand. It’s not so much an ingrained barbaric desire to see a guy break another’s nose as wanting to know if they’d go that far for a girl.
But then, we know most guys will probably hop on the ‘yes, of course’ train, which makes it seem useless to even ask.
As questions girls are afraid to ask guys go, this one should make the top list considering how notorious the gender in question is with heartbreak. Usually, by the time this question starts forming, we are already nearing a breakthrough in our detective work with piling evidence against the guy in question.
This is the flip side of their favorite thing to do with a girl question. The feminist in most women doesn’t like the reductive undertones that generalizing the whole gender has. Still, it’s something that lowkey bothers many. Knowing would be so much easier, but a lady wouldn’t want to come across the wrong way too, so it’s just complicated to ask.
‘’...Or what are the things you wish you could change about me?’’ Ordinarily, we know most guys won’t open up about this stuff, not really, because that would mean getting up close and personal in a way most girls can’t take. But the reluctance confirms that there are indeed things men wish they could change, which makes girls want to know even more.
The ‘can I trust you?’ bit usually comes up when a couple has started loving up, and the fear of rejection/getting betrayed kicks in. The stage where you want nothing more than to let your guards down and be vulnerable, but ghosts of exes past won’t stop haunting you with flashes of previous experience.
At that point, the question itself doesn’t scare women so much as what makes them want to ask it.
I have heard guys say one of their major turn-offs in a girl is having multiple male friends. The same set of people who would try their darndest to justify sharing all things personal with their female best friend can’t stand seeing a girl hug another guy for too long.
Now this question usually comes up with trust issues vibes, and you know how that can complicate things if you are already smitten.
In my head, I file this one under those ridiculous questions girls ask during pillow talk like ‘’Would you still love me if I turned to a bug or something?’’ Because let’s face it, they may say something else when you are all sated and heart-eyed, but we all know most guys can’t forgive cheating.
To be honest, the only reason this question scares this girl is because I know I’d never ask it with all of my no-strings senses still intact.
Sigh. We (I) dread asking a guy this question too, for the same reason as my last sentence above, but also because I know once I start thinking it, I’d want it out there. And once it’s out, you can’t unsay it, and then you have to live with the memory and cringe every time you remember if the guy turns out to be trash.
I’m not a very religious person, but if you’ve never had to ask a guy this, I pray you never have to. You see, this one usually comes after finding the answers we really don’t want to find but compellingly search for when the girl suspects that there is another woman.
Even with evidence pointing to the fact, we still want the culprit to confirm for himself that it’s more than a fling. It’s a terrible thing to hear, but it’s a question we have nonetheless.
Guys assume this statement comes easy to women, but it doesn’t. Just because some women have gotten so good at choosing their moment to slip it in doesn’t mean that they don’t hate to ask. Then again, when the option is between avoiding an awkward conversation and getting some breather from the anxiety that comes with not knowing, it’s not really a fair bargain.
This one probably doesn’t scare girls as much as guys – especially those with commitment issues which are like all of them, but it’s still something. Girls tend to avoid the marriage conversation after the initial talking stage until the relationship is solid-ish for fear of freaking the guy out.
But what really scares girls is the idea that the thought is only crossing their mind, not their boyfriend’s, which brings us back to effective communication, i.e., relationship 101.
Some women would rather eat sand than ask a guy to marry them. It’s not the same, but I don’t imagine having the “Is there an engagement in view” conversation will come easy to them either. Most of us know better than to rush into marriage these days, much less with an unready partner.
But we are also more aware than ever that life’s too short to waste with people whose paths don’t align with ours. Still, even though we worry for the right reasons, the truth is many girls fear being the first to bring up the marriage talk.
The most awkward question to ask a guy would have to be one that puts him on the spot no matter how he answers it and is difficult to casually move on from. What constitutes that differs for people depending on their personality and the situation.
Depending on the situation, juicy questions to ask a guy are those consistent with the mood you are trying to set, and he can easily roll with if interested.
Unless a girl is in a relationship with a guy or he’s previously told her it’s okay to, I’d avoid asking too many questions about his finances, for starters. Also, steer clear of his little guy’s size, me or [anything], and similar touchy questions until you are that close.
What are your sexual fetishes? Would you rather have an unwanted erection in front of your grandma or in front of the class and your crush? What’s your most humiliating memory? It depends on how you define embarrassing, really.
It depends on what the guy wants with or hopes to get from you. If he wants you to get to know him, he might appreciate questions with deeper answers than what he’d expect if he’s looking to hook up.
Banter aside, I hope we all take away the underlying message here, which is that some of these questions, though difficult, are necessary. Speak your truth always, as someone who has lived it too, I can assure you it won’t be the end of the world.
I thought it might help to know that another woman somewhere can relate. Kindly drop your own thoughts on the list along with the questions that personally scare you to ask guys in the comments, and share the article if you liked it.