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Things That Turn Guys Off In Bed (35 Turn-Offs In Bed)

by Sonya Schwartz

Sex is undoubtedly crucial to all men, which is why they crave to get it right. Having a turn off in the bedroom would make them feel dissatisfied, which could ruin their impression of you. Therefore, it’s vital to get the idea of all the possible things that could lead to a turn off during sex.

If you want to make any male feel like a hero in the bedroom, you need to know all the things to avoid. This article covers everything about what guys consider a turn-off in bed, and what you can do to make the experience with your partner better.

35 Things That Turn Men Off In Bed

1. Leaving The Work To The Man

It’s typical for women to allow the men to do the work while they’re being pleasured. They might see sex as a procedure that they have to fulfill, which involves laying back and watching, without participating or engaging in other activities. 

This notion is a turn off for guys. Guys have their needs and desires when it comes to sex. Thinking you have to follow a procedure, which is penetration, will only wear the guy out and make him feel like he’s the only one putting in an effort. Women should be able to make their partner feel loved in bed, steering away from the primary goal of penetration.

2. Focusing On Only His Genitals

Some women feel making a guy feel good in bed involves focusing on just his penis. Whereas, good foreplay goes beyond only the male genitals. There are numerous erogenous zones on your partner’s body that can give him the sensational feeling he’s searching for. 

It would be best for women to see the man as a whole entity, and not just with his penis, or they’ll fail to acknowledge these spots. Focus on other areas like his nipples, ear lobes, and even his balls. These things will make your partner enjoy sex more than you know.

3. Faking An Orgasm

faking an orgasm

The last thing you should do with a guy in bed is faking an orgasm. It plummets his ego and makes him feel inefficient. If you make him feel this way, he may not want to have sex with you again. 

Having an orgasm shouldn’t be the primary goal when it comes to sex, but should be more about the adventure. If ladies can have this mindset, they won’t feel the need to impress the guy by faking an orgasm. Rather, it’s important to let him know in other ways, that you genuinely enjoyed herself, which will keep him coming back for more.

4. Being Too Careful With His Penis

If a woman treats a guy’s penis like a fragile entity that she’s afraid to touch, this act will put the guy off. Women need to act like they know what they’re doing and grab it like they mean too. This act is what would conclusively put the man in a good mood and make him feel wanted. 

You’ll be able to communicate your desire to have him with this move which will set off the pace for the entire course. Such action needs some boldness, which you’ll have to incorporate from time to time to make the sex more fun.

5. Not Letting Him Be A Hero

Although men love to be pleasured from time to time, they’ll inevitably want to be the hero of the night. They want to be the guy that rescues the damsel and makes her feel safe. If you don’t give your partner the privilege of being your hero in bed, these are put-offs that make sex less attractive. 

Things like stealing the show and not allowing him to give you orgasm will put him off. Also, not allowing him to cuddle and make you feel safe during and after sex would only make you feel less wanted on the scene, which kills the moment more than you know.

6. Sticking To One Position

If a female likes a particular place and makes sure the guy she has sex with sticks to it every time they get together, it ruins the moment even before it begins. The two parties should be able to contribute their opinions on what they love, instead of a person dictating how it should be. 

If a woman is the only person dictating how the process should go, it will be perceived by the guy as selfish, and make him feel she doesn’t care about his desires. These are turn-offs for men that will make them hesitant to come back for more.

7. Being Clueless

being clueless

Having no idea what to do with the penis can be a major put off for guys. When women stare at it, ask questions, and need a guide for the process to flow, it can cause significant interruption, which no guy enjoys. Except it’s your first time, acting clueless will make the man hesitant to be with you again. 

Men love it when women can work their way around their bodies without instructions. They sometimes want them to own the process while they stay in the moment and enjoy it. If you tend to be clueless, you can do some research before meeting up with a man to make sure you stay on top of your game.

8. Don’t Want To Be Rough

There’s a difference between soft and passionate sex and wild sex. There are times to take things slow, while there are times to rough-handle the man and make him know that you want it. 

The mood of the sex always determines this process, so it’s still best to pay attention to the rhythm of things and flow with it. If you’re trying to keep things soft when the scenery is rough, it will slow everything down and lead to a turnoff. Likewise, if you’re trying to roughen everything up when it’s going at a smooth pace, it will kill the mood.

9. Putting On An Attitude

An attitude in bed is pointing out what you love, making comments about the guy’s choices, and merely being difficult because your desires in bed don’t agree with the man’s wants. Sex shouldn’t have to be a tedious process with demands even before the “action” begins. This act will only make everything rigid and uneventful. 

If you put up an attitude to a male, he will perceive sex with you as a contractual agreement that has to be followed to the core, which means he won’t enjoy the process as much as you’d like. This act is yet another turn off for guys.

10. Treating His Male Member Like A Toy

Failing to see the man as an entity, and paying too much attention to his penis will inevitably put down the excitement. When women treat the man’s member as a sex toy that needs to please them, they limit the fun that can come from the entire process. 

They would only focus on an aspect that satisfies them, instead of the whole encounter. Sooner or later, the man will feel like a dummy and perceive that the lady is only interested in his ‘ding-dong’, and not him. When a man feels unwanted, he’ll undoubtedly distance himself.

11. Wanting Only To Be Pleasured

wanting only to be pleasured

If the man is spending far too much time trying to make you feel good, the sex would be one-sided and unadventurous. You shouldn’t let him only focus on satisfying your desires because the man has desires too. Although men love the idea of making a woman feel good in bed, most of the time, they like receiving also. 

Major turn-offs occur when a female gets too comfortable with the man satisfying her, without focusing on his needs also. If you’re not giving him the attention he requires, he will get tired of pleasing you, which will kill the fun before it even starts.

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12. Bad Hygiene

Poor hygiene isn’t only bad in bed but in general. Nevertheless, it’s one of the major turn-offs in bed because body fluids are transferred during sexual intercourse. If this process isn’t neat and appealing, it will be difficult to enjoy it. If a man perceives you don’t take hygiene as a priority, he will refrain from having sexual contact with you the next time. 

Things like forgetting to brush, bathe, or even shave, will limit the pleasure-filled moments that can happen during sex.

13. Failing To Reciprocate

If you’re more concerned about receiving without giving, sooner or later, the man giving will get tired. Reciprocating is crucial in almost any sexual activity. In the same way, if you enjoy something; you need to return the favor as well. 

If he doesn’t want a particular act, then try another thing he likes. But allowing most of the time in the bedroom to be spent pleasuring you, without you feeling inclined to return the favor will only make sex boring. As a woman, strive to give and receive to avoid this turnoff. This act would be the highlight of the process.

14. Low Self-Esteem

A female with low self-esteem can inhibit the fun out of any sexual activity. She’ll be overly cautious about everything because she’s not comfortable in her skin. How she feels about herself will have a significant impact on whether the moment will be enjoyable or not. 

She might be concerned about her appearance, or perhaps, her sexual skills, and the more a woman believes she’s incompetent, the more she limits herself. She would be hesitant to step up to the platter because she fears the man might see her for what she thinks. This mindset puts guys off; therefore, confidence is crucial during sex.

15. Unwilling To Experiment

unwilling to experiment

There are several ways to make intercourse more exciting in the bedroom, and an example is testing. You won’t know what you love doing if you’re not willing to try new things once in a while. 

When a female detests this act, it can put the guy off instantly. The sex will undoubtedly become a routine and not an adventure when you repeat the same activity all the time. Most guys are always willing to go beyond the regular procedures, but when ladies cut short the excitement by refusing to experiment, it becomes a major turn off.

16. Coaching Him

Telling a man what to do when his ‘member’ is already inside you, puts more pressure on him and the situation. You shouldn’t coach him when he’s in the middle of the action, because it will mess with the natural flow. There are several ways women can coach men and get them to do an activity they love, without it being one of those off-putting. 

For example, seductively telling him what you love during foreplay or before you even get to the bedroom, or in student and teacher role-play. He would appreciate this act more than when you coach him on the spot.

17. Not Enjoying Yourself

For a man to enjoy his sexual encounter with a woman, he needs to know that she enjoyed herself. This procedure will stroke his ego and make him satisfied with the process. turn-offs happen when a woman doesn’t enjoy herself and doesn’t make an effort to. 

Thinking it’s the man’s job to make you like sex is a wrong mindset because it takes the action of the two parties to make the night memorable. Females who participate more during activities are bound to have their desires met than those that don’t make an effort and expect to be pleased.

18. Acting Like A Porn Star

acting like a porn star

Guys can tell the difference between women that are responding accurately to circumstances, and those that are being dramatic with their reactions. In the same manner, porn stars exaggerate their expressions and emotions during sex; doing this with a man is one of those turn-offs. 

He will perceive when the woman is trying to make the intercourse look too good to be true to stroke his ego, or for other personal reasons. Either way, no guy likes getting rewarded for something they didn’t work for, so it’s best to avoid this action.

19. Making Nasty Comments About His Size

Most men take pride in their masculinity because it’s something that satisfies them, and makes a woman feel good. Talking badly about his penis is a direct attack on his ego, which no male likes. Making terrible comments about its shape, size, or efficiency will only make him inferior. 

This act will undoubtedly push him away from you, both emotionally and physically, because he wouldn’t want to feel less than who he is. It’s important to praise and commend a guy’s littlest effort, because this action will get him excited to do more, and will avoid putting him off.

20. Being Distracted

Turnoffs for guys include failing to give your full attention to the sexual moment. This act can easily ruin the mood in the room. If your phone rings and you reach out to get it, it instantly communicates that the moment isn’t all that important. Being distracted by any activity, in general, would seem offensive, and undoubtedly kills the morale of your partner. 

Being attentive while he’s in the moment is the best way to avoid turning a guy off. Also, if you respond accurately to what he’s doing, you’ll show him that you’re conscious of everything, which he will love.

21. Spectatoring

Spectatoring is the act of worrying about one’s image during sex. This act occurs when a person doesn’t focus on their partner or the sensations they are feeling. This process can make people overly concerned about their appearance and how their partner is seeing them, rather than enjoying the moment. 

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Spectatoring can be a major turn off because your partner will identify that you’re not present in the situation, which will ruin the mood. The more concerned people are about other subjects instead of loving the experience, the more systematic sex would be, instead of being pleasant. 

Women who love to spectate might have innate body issues that they need to work on. This process will guarantee a better sexual experience.

22. Being Clingy

being clingy

Clinging to a guy you had sex with, and behaving like you’re instantly married are turn-offs for guys. Guys love to chase women, and when you’re preventing him from going after you, he may lose interest. Being clingy would push him further away from you because no guy likes to be smothered unnecessarily. 

It’s essential to give a guy some space after sex, especially when you’re not married or in a serious relationship with him. Distance will prevent him from getting tired of you quickly and would make sure every experience stays fresh.

23. Never Having An Orgasm

Turnoffs for guys include being too independent while having sex. If you’re unresponsive and too stiff to have an orgasm, the guy may be unimpressed about his encounter with you. You should loosen up and experiment if you want to have an orgasm. 

Let him locate your g-spot, make you feel good and allow you to head towards climax because that’s the highlight of the experience. Except it’s a sensitive medical condition, it’s best to keep exploring until you get it right. More so, resisting an orgasm would make men perceive you as a buzzkill, which isn’t pleasant.

24. Thinking A Guy’s Penis Is Gross

A guy would always see his member as his pride. Thinking a penis looks gross are major turn-offs for guys. He will refrain from sexual contact with you because your words would indirectly kill his self-confidence. More so, handling it like it’s repellent or yucky will put him off faster than you can imagine. 

He expects his woman to take his member like it’s the most fantastic thing she ever held. Women who make their men feel great about their body parts to tend to experience a better connection and better sex with their partners.

25. Pets Are Disrupting The Process

If you have pets running around your room or hopping on your bed while your male is in the middle of the action, he will find the scenery quite disturbing. It will be a total put off, especially when you’re trying to contain your pets. 

This type of scenario will kill his mood and also ruin the experience. Keeping your pets away when you’re engaging in sexual activities is the best way to avoid a turnoff. You and your man can have the privacy you need, which will heat everything in the bedroom.

26. Nasty Blowjob

nasty blowjob

When it comes to oral sex, it’s essential to get it right, or not engage in it at all. Biting a male’s penis or using your teeth during the process will make him withdraw from such activities with you.

If you make the blowjob messy, it’ll ruin the mood faster than anything. He’ll be skeptical about letting you go down on him again, which will limit the fun experiences you can have with each other. Keeping everything neat and pleasant will guarantee more exciting rounds.

27. Dirty Room

An unclean environment will put anyone off, especially your partner when he’s in for some action. Although a male may seem comfortable with a dirty room, deep down, he would want everything to be tidy so that he can go all the way with lovemaking.

An environment can significantly affect how two lovers enjoy their intercourse. This notion is why couples go to motels or luxury hotels for a pleasurable night. Putting an extra effort to keep your apartment tidy, especially when it’s time for bedroom activities, is something your significant other will notice and appreciate.

28. Turning Off The Lights

One thing men enjoy during lovemaking is keeping the lights on. Preferring to have sexual relations in the dark may be a turn off because most males don’t only want to have an idea of sex, they want to enjoy all aspects of it. 

They require all their senses to be active, which is why they like to see, feel, and hear everything happening. If you take away their ability to know, it will limit how much they’re going to enjoy the process, which will end up putting them off. If you want to get a guy hooked on you, you have to make sure you create a palatable environment for him to enjoy the moment.

29. Making Sour Faces

A way for males to tell how good their performing is through the expressions ladies make during sex. If she’s moaning and generally showing that she’s enjoying herself, he will feel a rush of encouragement to do better. On the contrary, if she’s making awful faces or expressing disgust, it will be discouraging to the male. 

This act will turn off any male individual because it sends a message that he’s doing a lousy job and perhaps, should stop. If you don’t want to offend the person you’re sleeping with, you should keep a positive expression all the time irrespective of his performance.

30. Teasing Him For Long

teasing him for long

It can be fun to tease your partner to get everything heated up, but when it’s time for some action, don’t hold him back much longer. You can arouse him quickly, but minutes too long will be a turn-off. 

Every lady should be sensitive to a guy’s demands and know when he’s all about sex at the moment. If you delay the process, thinking it will build up the intensity of lovemaking, you may merely tire him out in the long run. People enjoy being triggered but inevitably dislike it when they’re restrained from accessing their demands.

31. Spitting Out

During oral sex, men see little actions like a lady swallowing their semen as a fantastic thing. It seals the moment and further creates a bond between the two parties. If a lady spits instead of consuming, it secretly puts some guys off. Males tend to feel offended because spitting suggests they’ve produced a revolting substance. 

Any lady that prefers to spit can opt for another activity apart from a blowjob. This decision will prevent the guy from being grossed out and will increase your chances of a rematch. Another way would be to get accustomed to swallowing.

32. Not Cleaning Up Afterward

You’re not expected to tidy all parts of your body right after intercourse, but the sooner, the better. This act would limit your chances of odors and infections, which is essential for any sexual relationship. 

Your sexual health matters to the person you’re sleeping with, so forgetting to shower after sexual intercourse will create problems that will put your sexual associate off in the long run. More so, if he notices you don’t take your hygiene seriously, he will be offended by your lack of seriousness towards the situation.

33. Wearing Clothes When You Want To Have Sex

wearing clothes when you want to have sex

Men are moved by what they see, especially during sex. They want to feel and experience everything to make the moment more sensational. If you’re shy to leave everything all out, it will put him off. He will feel constrained and perceive that you’re uncomfortable with him. 

Some of the reasons why a lady would prefer to cover up include body image issues, and several other insecurities. You shouldn’t feel limited to expose yourself because of these issues; instead, you should focus on loving yourself. Doing this will help you and your partner relish the moment better.

34. Restricting Where He Can Touch

Your body would remain your partner’s center of attention during sexual intercourse. He wouldn’t only be interested in the penetration but would put his sense of touch to fair use as well. If you restrict where he can touch or have access to during lovemaking, it will put him off. He won’t feel like he has all of you, which would be dissatisfying in the end.

35. Kissing And Telling

Telling individuals all about your escapades in the bedroom will keep most men away from you. Although they may enjoy when their commendable sexual skills are brought to the ears of others, they would prefer intimate matters to be kept a secret, especially if they share an emotional bond with you.

Making comments about having sex with a guy will undoubtedly break trust in the relationship.

FAQs

What things turn guys off in bed?

Actions like sticking to a position, trying to control everything, and allowing the man to do everything can be a turn off in the bedroom. It’s essential to look for ways to make sex more pleasurable each time, without sticking to routines all the time.

What are weird things that turn guys on?

Seductively biting your lip, having a friendly personality, and outright being yourself are all weird acts that can turn on or arouse men. Since guys can respond differently to seduction, it means several little actions can trigger them.

Is being too available a turnoff?

Different people interpret affection in different ways. For some people, spending quality time is how they feel loved. It’s essential to check how someone interprets endearment, and observe the quality of relationship you have with them, to know if your availability will put them off.

Where do you touch a guy?

Guys get triggered by the littlest of actions. Merely touching his skin will get him to turn on. You can touch his face, hands, and all major areas of his skin. You can also feel the hidden parts to arouse him even more.

Why do guys lose interest after they sleep with you?

Guys get uninterested after sex because they don’t have an emotional connection with the ladies. You can be all up in his face for weeks, but if nothing is mentally connecting you to him, he will move on after satisfying his physical craving.

In Conclusion

Did you enjoy this article? Don’t forget that to make sex with your partner more satisfying, you have to be willing to go outside your comfort zone. Kindly leave a comment and share this article with other people if it helped.

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Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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