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My Husband Wants Sex All The Time (Is That Normal?)

by Sonya Schwartz

Are you worried that your husband wants sex all the time? 

Do you want to explore why he is so ravenous for sex?

Are you looking for ways to keep him happy in spite of your mismatched sex drives? 

If so, read on because this guide answers all these questions. 

But first, I urge you to read the next few sentences carefully. 

A sudden change in your partner’s sexual appetite doesn’t just appear out of nowhere. 

In most cases, it’s a result of a change in your relationship. If you’re not sure what this change is, it might be something that’s happening behind your back. 

It’s rare that your partner will be honest about this. The only surefire way to know what’s going on is to find out

That’s why I want to recommend this powerful yet discreet online tracker tool.

It only needs a few of your partner’s basic details to get started. Once it has them, it can quickly produce a detailed record of his recent communications. 

You’ll discover who he’s been frequently communicating, what online services he’s using, what contact details he has registered and more. 

If something dodgy is going on behind the scenes, this tool will make it immediately obvious. 

Anyway, we list the reasons why your husband may want sex a lot and read on for our full guide on dealing with a husband who wants sex too often.

Why Does My Husband Want Sex So Much?

There are a whole host of reasons why your husband may want sex so much. Here, we look at some practical as well as emotional reasons why they want to make love to their partners.

Men Usually Have A Higher Libido

Men, on the whole, have a higher libido than women. They simply, as a gender, want to have more sex due to their higher sex drive. A great deal of this reasoning can be biological. It will be due to hormones and also physical need.

Men are meant to try to have sex as often as they can to 'sow their wild oats'. They are biologically wired to try to ensure their blood line continues. While this is not how it will come across to you when you are married, and instead it simply appears that he wants to have sex every time he sees you, at least you can be sure that he does not as much have a sex addiction, just a primal urge that is difficult to change.

For women, their sex drive is lower as their bodies do not have the same hormones raging through their bodies - or at least at the levels that men have. Women's hormones are different and so their need for sex will be more closely aligned to when their bodies are ovulating. In essence, if a woman's body has released an egg, the woman will want more sex around that time.

It's Their Way Of Marking Their Territory

It's Their Way Of Marking Their Territory

While we may emotionally live in the age of equality, a man's sex drive is firmly rooted in a time where he needed to protect his wife. Constantly sleeping with a woman is a man's way of marking his territory and making his masculinity known.

As a consequence, having sex with you is his chance to show you how manly he is. By showing you how manly he is, he is attempting to negate your need to go and get a partner elsewhere. Some men are happy with this type of marking of territory on a less frequent basis, whereas some men will approach the problem by wanting to have sex with you all the times he can.

This may sound odd to some but it is a key driver to a man's need for sex - even when he is married, and has been in a marriage for a long while. It's one of the reasons that sex is so important to relationships.

Low Confidence

It may sound perverse or container intuitive but people sometimes crave sex simply because they have low self confidence. While some exhibit their insecurities in other ways, it is not uncommon for people with low self esteem to want to have a lot of sex as a way to get their confidence up.

The trouble with if your husband is one of the guys that instigates sex often because he has a low opinion of himself, is that it can hurt their feelings badly if you refuse for whatever reason. This can be troublesome because when you start refusing every so often, but you know it will hurt their feelings, it can get to the point that you actually feel obligated to sleep with them on every occasion that they want.

The reason that this is not a fantastic position to be in is that obligation is not a good reason to sleep with someone. If you fear that this is can be the case in your relationship every once in a while, then it would be a good idea to sit down with your husband and talk it through with him - even if it does get uncomfortable discussing it at times.

Some People Want More Sex Than Others

Similar to the widely thought fact that men have a higher libido than women, you can also take solace in the fact that your husband wants sex so often simply because you are two different people. No two people will have the same level of sex drive. It will always be the case that one partner in a relationship will want more sex than the other.

On occasion it may well be, therefore, that it is the woman that would want more sex than the man. While, as previously discussed, this is not always the case, it is good to realise that it may feel like your husband wants sex so much, but that is only in comparison to your sex drive. If your husband had exactly the same need for sex as he does now, but you actually wanted more, it could well be that it is him who thinks you want sex at any given opportunity. And so it could be him that would find your libido intimidating.

Be Sure It Is Actually Sex He Is After

It is not uncommon for a woman to recoil from her husband's innocent touch because she thinks he would like it to go further. So in answer to the question why does my husband want sex all day every day, be sure that it is actually sex he wants.

It could well be that he is just being affectionate with you and his way of instigating sex is not him instigating sex at all and you have read his signals incorrectly. It could well be that he wants things to go further, or would like them to go further, but that does not always necessarily mean that it even crossed his mind.

A lot of the problem with when this issue arises in a relationship is from communication - if you feel he wants sex from you a lot, when in fact he doesn’t, you may misinterpret his signals elsewhere.

How Do I Cope With My Husband Who Wants More Sex Than Me?

How Do I Cope With My Husband Who Wants More Sex Than Me?

Sex Begets Sex

While it can be difficult for women to understand at first, if they actually have sex with their other half every time their partner wants to have sex, the person with the lower libido will find that they soon will see an increase in their sex drive.

This is because sex begets sex. This is for several reasons but the number one practical reason is, that the more you sleep with each other, the better you will become at pleasing one another. You will soon instinctively know what the other one likes, and doesn't like.

This in turn fuels desire on the part of both parties and soon you will both feel like you want to have sex a great deal more.

Take It As A Compliment

While it can be exhausting to constantly sleep with your husband every time he wants sex, it is also a good idea to remember that it is very flattering that he wants you so much. Remember to take it as a compliment therefore that your other half wants to have sex with you so much.

This can be hard to remember, especially when you have been married a long while, but remember that sex is a two way street. He will also like it that you want to sleep with him so if you are the one to instigate it, you may find that he does not feel the need to make love to you so often as he will know that you find him sexually attractive too.

Often the person with the lesser libido actually takes it for granted that their other half finds them physically attractive. Your husbands needs to know that you want to sleep with him and feel like you are are physically as interested in him as he is in you.

Plus allow the fact that he wants to have sex every moment he is with you to boost your confidence. By becoming more confident in yourself, you will naturally become more confident in the bedroom and you find that you like sex even more.

Sex Can Help Bring You Closer Together

Another reason that you should not worry about your husband's needs to have sex every moment he sees you, is that sex is a great way of keeping the bond between you very strong. In fact, sex is a great way of strengthening a relationship and making you both feel closer to one another.

The reason being for this is that not only is it a private act between the two of you, but also the fact that by knowing that you are the only person answering the sexual needs of your husband can make you more confident in your partnership.

Additionally, having sex with someone is an action that can make you feel very vulnerable - either because you are naked or exploring the boundaries of your sexual desire. When you let yourself be vulnerable to someone and they allow you to be yourself without judgement, that can be an incredibly powerful force for good in your partnership.

Try to use every sexual encounter you have with your husband as an opportunity to find out what he wants and likes as well as showing him what your wants and needs are too. It is a great way of making your sex life even better each and every occasion you sleep with one another.

It Should Give You Peace Of Mind

On a practical level, the fact that your husband wants sex with you each time he lays eyes on you should also give you peace of mind. If he's having sex with you a lot, he will be having his needs met and you also know that he will not be looking for sex with any other women.

Again, this means that your confidence should grow and as a result your sex life should improve. Knowing that your husband, or simply your partner, is only having sex with you is incredibly empowering. You can use it to your advantage in the bedroom by knowing that you are the only one that can answer his sexual needs and that can make you feel more at ease with yourself and with your relationship.

Sexual Intimacy Is A Cornerstone Of A Relationship

Sexual Intimacy Is A Cornerstone Of A Relationship

Being intimate with someone on a sexual level is a cornerstone to a relationship as desire drives feelings of lust and need for physical intimacy. Desire is central to a healthy relationship as it's not only a rare feeling (hence people's need for monogamy), it can help solidify other aspects of a partnership in terms of support and respect.

Plus passion is such a fundamental element to any romantic partnership as it is what helps differentiates a romantic relationship from a platonic one. Without sexual intimacy, your marriage would be little more than just a friendship or long term companionship.

It is possible to be happy in such relationships, but the marriages that so often are actually for life, are the ones where the partners desire each other on a physical level.

Understanding this can be key to making peace with how often you husband may feel the need to have sex. Being sexual with you, is not just about his pleasure therefore. It is a way for him to get closer to you and solidify your relationship further. Even for marriages that have celebrated years and years of anniversaries.

Embrace It

If your husband has a very passionate nature that means that he likes to have a lot of sex, then one of the best things you can do is just to embrace it. He is going to be in your life as your partner and so it is a good idea just to accept the fact that he likes to have more sex than you and go with it.

Once you have done this, you will actually start to enjoy sex more and feel more in the mood for it more often. By accepting his higher libido, you will feel less overwhelmed by it and happier to go with the flow.

Bearing that in mind, it is a good idea to tell him what you like and open up the lines of communication with him over your wants and needs in the bedroom. Men tend to be straight talkers in life and so will be more than open to the idea of you verbally telling him what you like to get up to between the sheets.

All couples will do better in all areas of their relationship if they talked more to each other. This is never more the case than when talking about their bedrooms antics.

Husband Wants Sex All The Time - The Bottom Line

When you are with a husband that seems to desire to have sex with you around the clock, it can be exhausting on both a physical and mental level. Firstly, having sex a lot is physically demanding and sometimes you may well need a break. Additionally, your physical fitness may not match his which can make a further imbalance.

Secondly, it can often be exhausting on a mental level for a couple of reasons. One is that women approach sex as a much more mental exercise than men do. They need to be emotionally connected more often than not to the guy they are sleeping with to make it a pleasurable. This need for an emotional connection is what can make it a tiring activity on the brain.

The other reason sex can be tiring for a woman on a mental level when they have a husband who wants to have sex all day is that on the occasions where she says no, it can be painful to refuse. The reason being is that they know they will cause their partner hurt by refusing his advances. Because of this prior knowledge they will most likely have tried to come up with a way to break the news to their partner gently and become anxious about refusing him as a result.

Anxiety is one of the most tiring emotions out there so even if you love your husband very deeply, it can get to the point in your married life where you are nervous about sleeping with him.

Do you have a husband who wants sex more than you? Leave your thoughts and comments below!

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

12 comments on “My Husband Wants Sex All The Time (Is That Normal?)”

  1. I have a way higher sex drive than my wife so I wanted to know a woman’s perspective. It lead me to this site. As a man I have to say a lot of this is spot on. Idk why I desire it so much on a genetic level so I can’t confirm that.

    But what I can say as a man there’s several reasons I want sex often and they range from physical to emotional.

    Simply Said I find my wife insanely sexy. I could go on forever but I love everything about her physically. Her soft face, her curves, the feel of her skin, everything. So I’m not going to lie it is a lot physical but before you judge me a horned up pig there’s so much more. It’s just the physical that I have to see every day and does create a physical desire.

    It’s truly a way of intimacy for men. I feel closer to my wife during and after sex. I know it sounds weird but it’s like it almost resets the relationship like you are drawn back in closer. It’s like a beginning of a relationship you miss your partner when they’re away then when you see them again it’s great. Sex does that same thing for some of us men.

    Since sex is the most intimate thing that you can do with someone it’s truly an expression of love.

    It helps us cope. I swear this is where men and woman are cursed. When we’re stressed, dealing with issues, overwhelmed, sex helps us. I know for women it’s harder for them to be in the mood amongst all these same things.

    But I really think this author nailed it. If I had it my way I’d have sex with my wife almost every day even 10 years into marriage. But I know that’s too much for her :)) so I only try a few times a week so know some of us have already self compromised knowing there’s a mismatched libido.

  2. I’m not sure who wrote this but a lot is wrong with what I read.. at least in my life..!! sex 2-3 times a day is exhausting- but I give In —my day is amazing when we make love— and I love it - just not every second—!!! It is flattering and he tells me nonstop how much he loves me and how pretty I am.. always complements - it’s great and sweet... (my friends are all jealous) but even then —always ends in sex!! I love being with him but gosh — I need a break - which is impossible because—- impossible to make him satisfied.
    when we make love it’s amazing but enough is enough— can’t catch my breath—!! And like I said faithful and married 30!years— (even when my time of month) he expects me to perform other ways - usually do so happily - but gosh “”” can I get a free second pleazzz!!!
    If I say anything- then a fight- ugh!! not worth it!!. I’m tired ~~~~~
    Been married 30 years - I love my husband so much-dearly -we grew up together—- we’ve been through a horrible tragedy losing our 25 yr old daughter to drunk driver— (9-5-2017~~ on our 28th wedding anniversary) We’ve been through a lot — ~~but this is tough really hard.. !
    I don’t want his feelings hurt - he always takes so personally ... when all I want is some time without feeling like I have to perform ! Time together that doesn’t end up having sex... !!! but I have no choice - have sex sex sex or deal with a jerk... easier to just do it to have better days etc. but I’m so tired ... and with dealing with my daughters death I haven’t much energy to argue or make a deal!
    Out of this ... I’m so tired of one or the other - sex/happy —— no sex/ jerk unhappy husband??? What to do??

    Sorry so long but I’ve been dealing with this for so long—

  3. @JJP your situation sounds like mine except for losing a child. I’m sorry for your loss. I wish I could provide some info on how to deal with this. I did have a chart with my husband and requested a every other day because I told him I’m at my breaking point and he stresses me out. At least for now he agrees. Waiting to see how it works out.

  4. Your approach to this topic is deeply disheartening. Relationships should be based upon partnership. Encouraging women to acquiesce to their husband's rather than express their emotional needs is a formula for a one sided marriage predicated upon avoiding conflict instead of expressing true needs and desires. The preponderance of men who demand daily sex from their wives is not indicative of discrepant sex drives. It points to deeper dynamics that should be investigated. Wives are not here to "please" their husbands. That is an approach to marriage which is predicated upon exchanging sex for financial support. It's 2020 and we are WAY past that. At the very least, attention needs to be redirected toward the woman's sexual satisfaction as in far too many marriages, sex caters to the husband's desires setting wives up to function as prostitutes in their own marriages. I have nothing agains prostitution but it does not belong in a marriage.

    1. I completely agree with you. Everything I read indicates a lot omen should find ways to have more sex. Why shouldn't the man need to find a way to reduce his drive. I don't care if it's in a man's nature to spread his seed. He is a human and can control his behavior. He needs to find a more productive way to channel his own energy. If he was as exhausted as emotionally and physically exhausted at the end of the day as I am, I doubt he'd want sex. Men's role doesn't change much done with marriage and having kids but a woman has to become a wife, mother, housekeeper, house manager, etc. While still maintaining a career. I have little left to service his need to spread his seed. I'm also tired of feeling guilty to shut him down multiple times a day and be told I'm teasing him because I want a hug. If he wants to feel vulnerable, he just needs to find a way to open up that isn't through sex. It's frustrating to be a women in this modern age if you can call it that.

      1. Exactly I so agree.. it's like they expect it daily... What about just cuddling sumtimes... Should not have to lead to sex..yes if feekslike exchange for providing I don't like that ...

        1. Liz,
          If you turn him down everyday it is no wonder he wants sex every day. 😀

          And most likely you are the one who is exchanging sex for providing.
          Otherwise I don't see why you just don't find another roommate who does not have a balls (maybe your mother?). It would solve all your problems(except financial I guess).

  5. Stupidest article I've read and now I see where my husband gets these incorrect suggestions. Especially the "sex begets sex" crap. That was what he would say to "fix me". I tried. Did it work? Nope, not once for the past 6 years. All it did was piss him off even more because he felt I was only doing it for him. There could be many more physiological reasons why sexual desire is low yet you don't mention them, as if it's just a matter of the woman's attitude towards sex.

  6. The comments thus far are funny. I just don't get it. So you get married, have children and just become friends with sometimes benefits? Or when YOU feel like it?

    "All it did was piss him off even more because he felt I was only doing it for him"

    No shit - Men want to feel wanted to. They don't want a roommate. They want a partner in life they can trust, love, have sex with, watch their babies grow.

    If you know your sex drive is low, either disclose it from the jump or stay out of relationships. If you have emotional problems then fix them. Marriage sure as hell won't make it better. If your husband isn't doing it the way you need then tell him. Show him. Send him a video with you doing it to yourself. They are FAST learners in the sex dept, lol.

    I am 48 and my husband is 56. This man's drive is enough to run through a harem of woman, lol. Do I feel like it all the time? Nope. But I also didn't feel like getting up at 3am to change diapers or adding 2 hours to my day for dance or karate class for the kids. Isn't amazing how you will bend over backwards to make the kids lives as easy as possible but feel like the husband (who gave you those kids) deserves the same sacrifice?

    Interesting right?

    Good luck to all. I'm grateful to the universe for giving me a man that still wants me all the time, gropes my body when I walk by and insists on being naked in the bed. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you God.

    And I'm a woman 🙂

    1. Superb comment!

      Women should know all this stuff about men BEFORE marriage. It’s the idiots in the education system that should be telling girls that men are far more sexual than they are - in order to prepare for marriage.

      And then you get people's relationship expectations completely skewed which ends in divorce - and a windfall for psychologists on the way down.

      It’s a self perpetuating cycle created by feminists and psychologists which makes for a miserable culture.

      Women knew all this stuff 50 yrs ago when they got married. Now we’ve regressed!

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