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Is My Ex Trying To Make Me Jealous? (13 Ways to Tell)

Last updated on August 31, 2022 by Sonya Schwartz

Are you wondering whether your ex is trying to make you jealous?

Perhaps you know he is - and you’re wondering why?

Either way, you’re in the right place. 

This guide reveals the clearcut signs that your ex is deliberately trying to make you feel envious and his motives for doing so. 

However, before I reveal these signs, it’s important you read the next few sentences carefully. 

It’s almost impossible to get an accurate impression on how your ex is doing after a breakup.

Oftentimes, they will make a concerted effort to create a false impression, especially for you.

This makes it difficult to decipher whether they have truly moved on - or if they’re open to reconciliation.

That’s why I want to recommend this powerful online tracker tool for you.

With just a few of your ex-partner’s basic details, this tool can create an expansive log of their recent communications history.

You’ll discover who they have been calling and texting, what smartphone apps and online services they’ve been using, plus what contact details they have.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg…

Ultimately, this tool will show you the true picture of how your ex-partner is getting on without you.

With this information to hand, you’ll be in a better position to decide whether it’s worth trying to win them back.

Our guide on whether he’s trying to make you jealous will help too. Scroll down to find out what’s really going on in his head.

13 Ways to Understand if Your Ex is Trying to Make You Jealous

Going through a breakup is the absolute worst, especially when they happen unexpectedly. It's normal to wonder, “Is my ex trying to make me jealous?” or if he still has feelings for you after a breakup, especially if he's somehow still present in your life. It's also quite normal to want them back. 

Some relationship experts suggest that you check for signs of jealousy or possessiveness from your ex to avoid giving yourself false hope and determine if he still has feelings for you. That way you can begin the best course of action (eg the no contact rule) to get him back in the nearest future. 

If you're in this position and you’re wondering if he has you in mind, this is the article for you. Below are 13 signs your ex is trying to make you jealous. 

1. He doesn't text back immediately

If you and your ex-boyfriend haven’t lost touch after your breakup, then you can tell if he's trying to make you envious through his response times. Suppose you're having a friendly chat with him and all of a sudden his response times get longer and longer. This is a sign that he's trying to make you jealous. He's basically showing you that you aren't entitled to his talking time anymore and what you see is what you get. 

It's all power play; his own way of trying to protect his own ego and act hard to get. He knows that his delayed responses will make you overthink things and wonder if it's something you said or did. Even though there's a possibility that he's actually busy, you can be sure it's a mind game if it keeps happening over and over. 

2. He's been posting lots of photos of himself lately

he's been posting lots of photos of himself lately

If your ex is posting thirst traps on his social media just after your breakup, he definitely has something to prove. You'll be sure he's trying to make you feel weird if he's posting pictures of himself being productive or being active at the gym. The gym photos are usually the most obvious telltale signs. 

You'll also know something is fishy if he's suddenly posting photos of him spending time in new places wearing clothes and shoes you've never seen him wear before, you just know he went out of his way to make you envious. 

It's normal for people to get out there and try new things after a breakup. It helps get them out of that depressive head space and get them started on a new beginning. However, rubbing it in your face is just plain petty and there's only one reason your ex would be doing that- to make you jealous. 

3. He suddenly has new female followers or friends on social media

Following new girls on Instagram or liking and commenting on other girls' photos is another clear sign that he's trying to make you jealous. 

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him.

Take this quick quiz to see if he actually likes you!

You'll know it's not just a coincidence if all these girls happen to be classically attractive or just his type. If it's happening way too much, he probably wants to keep showing up in your feed so he looks like the cool guy everyone is after. 

To make it even more ridiculous, he may tag them in photos or comment excessively on their photos so it looks like he has great relationships with them. No one is meeting attractive people everyday and suddenly becoming friends on social media. It's just not realistic. 

4. He keeps bringing up other women when you talk with him

This applies only if your breakup was amicable and you still talk with him from time to time. You'll notice that he brings up different girls when he talks and they all seem to be people you've never met or heard of. It's either Kaytlin from the gym, Cary from work, or Jess from yoga. These members of the opposite sex all seem to be a part of his everyday life all of a sudden; don't fall for that, he's just trying to be slick. 

One way to know all the meetings aren't coincidental is that he keeps emphasizing on how pretty or hot the girls are. You'll also notice that he talks about a new person after a few weeks, which seems strange. Also, if he keeps telling you how great their relationship is going and how she may be 'the one', he's definitely trying to make you jealous. 

5. His social media habits have changed drastically

You will probably be one of the first people to notice this since you know him more than most people do. You know exactly what your ex likes to post and how frequently he's online. 

So, if any of this changes you just know he's trying to make an impression. Suppose the tone of his posts change or he suddenly seems to post more often, he’s definitely trying to get your attention. You may even notice that he's way more expressive on his posts than usher has ever been throughout your relationship. It's almost like he's trying to pass across a message to someone. 

It's possible that the breakup took a toll on him and that's why his social media habits have changed; things may not always be about you. However, since you know him well you will know when his posts are directed at you.

6. He flaunts his new girlfriend a bit too much

he flaunts his new girlfriend a bit too much

There's nothing wrong with showing off a new relationship on your social media platforms, especially when you're really happy about it. However, excessively posting about what you got your partner for their birthday, how you flew them out for your anniversary, etc., is just plain attention seeking. 

You will know this isn't a coincidence if he posts multiple times in a day and tries to tag mutual friends so you can see how he spoils this other girl. Showing you that he's spoiling his new bae is equivalent to telling you, "look what you're missing". If you aren’t over him this could affect your self-esteem.

Most people can agree that the most fun times happen offline, so if your boyfriend really cares about the new person he’s dating, then he shouldn't feel the need to post those moments all the time. 

7. He starts to hang out with the girls he knows you never liked

This move is probably more out of spite than anything else. If your ex suddenly develops some kind of love for a girl he knows you hate, then he's definitely trying to get your attention. 

Perhaps things didn't quite end the way he would have liked it to end so he's being passive-aggressive about everything. So, the best way he can get back at you is to become allies with the person he knows you dread

Even though the girl in question may not know you, he knows that certain feelings will be triggered the moment you see him with this girl. She may be from a previous relationship or just a random female rival. It's either he's trying to make you jealous or he's just bonding with this girl because they have a common enemy now- you. 

8. He keeps boasting to friends who know you about how happy he is with his new partner

If he's truly happy with his new life then he shouldn't care what you think about it. So, if he goes out of his way to show how happy he is dating this new person, perhaps he's just trying to get your attention. 

If your ex can't reach you on social media, he will try to get to you through friends. He will target friends that are closest to you so he's sure you will hear about his perfect life. It's less likely that this is a coincidence because it's not normal for you to know all about your ex's new girl. 

Even before meeting her, you know how she looks, her career, her hobbies, etc. There's also a chance that you need to change your friends because no good friend would want to burden you with all those details, they would want you to be happy, healthy, and to move on. 

9. He asks about you

he asks about you

Trying to figure out if your ex wants to make you jealous can be exhausting. Truth is, no matter how glaring the signs may seem, sometimes it's just plain coincidence. However, if you're out of a relationship that ended amicably, there's a pretty high chance your ex wants you back and he's trying to use jealousy as a tool to do this. 

If he still asks about you through friends, even after he flaunts his new relationship online, it's your attention he was trying to get. If you aren't posting on social media frequently or sending messages through people who know you too, there's no way he can truly know how you’re doing or if you have a new boyfriend. So, the only way he can get information about you is if he asks about you. So if your friends keep telling you that he asked about you, he's probably trying to find out if his antics are working. 

10. He accuses you of being jealous if you complain about his behavior

If he accuses you of being jealous the moment you mention his strange behavior, that's another sign that he's trying to make you jealous. If he's been trying to make you jealous for a while it means that will be on his mind through most of the day. That's why it's the first thing that comes to his mind if you say a word about his recent behavior. 

How you will know if he's truly playing games is if his reaction seems primed. He's probably rehearsed this response over and over in his head so he can sound put together when the time comes. 

If he really did move on, he wouldn't get mad and accuse you of being jealous. He would probably apologize for anything he did to agitate you and may feel nothing because he never saw it in the light. 

11. He will get upset if you block him

If he's trying to make you jealous he will get upset if you block him because he has no audience for his charades anymore. 

It's normal for you to be fed up with all the drama and the fact that he rubs everything in your face. So, your next option could be to block him so you can stop feeling jealous and mind your own business. Although that may seem a bit harsh, an ex who isn't interested in his ex-girlfriend anymore would probably not notice they've blocked him or simply ignore it.

However, if he's focused on making you jealous, he will take it personally. He may reach out through a mutual friend or come all the way to your house to ask why you blocked him. He knows this because he’s probably feeling jealous himself and stalks you just as much as you stalk him. 

12. He misses you

Whether your ex is in a new relationship or not, when it’s just him and his thoughts at night, he can't escape the fact that he misses you. This is true especially if things ended drastically and he never really got closure, the only person he'd want to speak to is you. 

You'll know he misses you if he keeps calling when he's drunk or if he sends you a drunk message. Missing someone you can't talk to can keep you up at night and most people run to alcohol to help them deal with it. However, if he doesn't call you, try calling him in the middle of the night. If he picks up his call immediately, he probably misses you. 

13. He asks for advice on his new 'perfect' relationship

he asks for advice on his new perfect relationship

One of the hardest things to do is to keep talking to your ex when they've started dating a new person. It's nice to be there for them if you can, but you also need to consider that you're human and you have feelings.

However, if you're still present in their lives, it's a good way to know if he still has feelings for you and is trying to make you jealous. No matter how close you are to your ex, he knows that it's weird to ask you for advice on his new relationship. If he asks anyway, it means he’s trying to gauge your reaction to see if you care. In this case, there's a big chance he's trying to make you jealous. 

FAQs

How do I know if my ex is trying to make me jealous?

If he's trying to make you jealous, he will take ages to text you back. He'll also post excessive photos of himself on his social media so you can see how good he looks. If he's in a new relationship, he'll boast about his current girlfriend to you and to mutual friends. 

How do you know if your ex is trying to get your attention?

You'll know he's trying to get your attention if he keeps asking after you. Also, if he keeps telling friends how happy he is in his new relationship, then he's trying to get your attention. His social media posts could also tell you if he's trying to get your attention. If he's posting way too much, then it's probably a cry for attention. 

Does jealousy help get an ex back?

Using jealousy to try getting an ex back is the worst strategy you can use. Jealousy hardly ever helps get a loved one back. If your ex figures out that you're trying to make them feel jealous, it could chase them away. It's a form of playing mind games and a huge turn-off. 

How do you know if your ex still has feelings for you?

Ironically, if your ex disappears after you broke up with him, it's a sign that he probably still has feelings for you. He's not active on social media anymore, he doesn't seem to hang out with his friends as usual and he may not be taking your calls. These signs could indicate that he's still trying to deal with the effects of the breakup.

How do you know your ex isn't over you?

If you recently broke up, you'll know they aren't over you if they're still angry and hurt. They've made it clear that they blame you for the breakup and they're hurt by it. You could also tell they aren't over you if they keep sending mixed messages. One says they're calling to check up on you and the next they're cold towards you.

In Conclusion

I hope you found this article helpful. Remember, if he's flaunting his perfect life, he's probably not that happy. Please let me know what you think about this topic in the comment section below and be sure to share the article with friends. 

Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. You have to understand how he is wired. Once you do, you'll find there is a subtle thing you can say that to him that will drastically change how he shows his emotions towards you.

Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not!

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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