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How To Satisfy Your Husband After Having A Baby (11 Respectful Ways)

by Sonya Schwartz

Remember how you and your husband used to have sex effortlessly? It did not take much to get you in the mood. You two could practically have sex anytime, anywhere, whenever you felt like it. But you got pregnant. Then came the first baby. All of a sudden, you are not in the mood to have sex.

Having a new baby is supposed to bond the family together, but somehow, after the arrival of the baby, your sex life is suffering tremendously. Sometimes, you feel bad that this is the situation you are dealing with. But there is hope. You can definitely satisfy your spouse after having a newborn child.

So how do you do it? I’ll answer this question and more in the tips below to satisfy your husband after having a baby. 

11 Ways To Satisfy Your Husband After Having A Baby

1. Take care of yourself

Being a new parent is another phase of life. It is something no one is exactly prepared for, even though you have read all the parenting books out there. When reality hits you, you are bound to be affected physically, emotionally, and even psychologically, no matter how much you have prepared for this parenthood journey. 

It is, therefore, no surprise that you are bound to overthink things after the child is born. You likely wonder whether you will be a good parent, or whether you can handle the responsibility that comes with taking care of a child, etc. Also, the period after birth is a time for healing

Your man supported you throughout the pregnancy. So, this experience also affected him one way or another. Making an effort to take care of yourself can at least allay your husband's fears if he tries to make a sexual move to you. 

2. Make time for each other

make time for each other

It is relatively difficult to have time for each other when the baby arrives. This is because babies are delicate and need every care and attention. As you are so busy with the baby, it is very easy to forget you even have a husband. That’s why you should try to make time for each other, and spice things up in the relationship.

Try to get a family member or a babysitter to take care of the baby while you go out on dates with hubby. This will help build the bond between you and your hubby. And whenever you feel ready to indulge in sex, you two can take it from there.

3. Churn in new ideas

Your sex life can turn boring after the birth of your child. It is even possible you may not readily want to have sex for a while after giving birth. It is quite understandable given the pain you went through when delivering your child. However, your marriage does not have to stall, because you became a new parent. 

You can churn in new ideas to make your sex life a great one. You and your spouse can experiment with new sex styles. And when you do not want to have sexual intercourse with your husband, you can engage in other sexual activities like blowjobs, making out, or sexual outercourse.

Another idea is to mark out zones in the house where you can have a quickie with your husband. It would be fun to meet up in those spots and have some sexual intimacy when your newborn is asleep. 

4. A reminder that you are first a woman before you are a mother

While you are a new mom, you also need to remind yourself that you are first a woman, before you are a mother. Despite the hormonal changes that took place, it is understandable that you start feeling unattractive. 

However, you should know that beauty is mental. The fact that your body went through all those changes before and after your pregnancy does not make you any less of a beautiful woman. So keep that in mind. 

Also, don't dress like an old lady or hide your body just because you delivered. What’s more, do not hide yourself because you have delivered one baby. Your husband will realize that. Rather, dress to feel sexy and show your beautiful curves. This will create sexual desire in your man which means your sex life has a future.

5. Find ways to bond with your husband

While a great sex life is one of the ways you can bond with your husband, it is not the only way you can connect with him. As you heal, it may not be advisable to have sex immediately after delivery. However, you and your partner can engage in things you two love to do together. 

For instance, you can both have a bubble bath together. It screams sexual intimacy, even without sex. Or you could both visit a spa together so that you can bond. It will prove to be very beneficial for your emotional well-being. 

6. Schedule time for sex

In the past, you and your man could do whatever whenever, but after the baby arrived, you no longer have time for yourselves. Spontaneous sex is impossible because you get interrupted by the baby's cries and needs. When this happens, it is time to be intentional about your sexual relationship. 

If you don't schedule sex, you may not have it. You’ll be too busy with baby responsibilities. And when you don't have sex constantly, that spark in the relationship will gradually diminish. 

7. When your baby takes a nap, do so too

Babies are adorable, but they are a handful. Therefore, to make the work easier for you and your partner, when your newborn takes a nap, take one too. This is so that you do not get too tired to attend to your husband's sexual needs. Neglecting your man's needs for the baby is not the very best, neither is attending to the newborn at the expense of your husband's needs. 

But there is a loophole to satisfying the needs of the two most important people in your life. If you strategize better, you can satisfy both. So, turn off your phone, have the right atmosphere ready so that when your baby naps, you’ll also have the opportunity to nap. This means your baby's naptime corresponds with yours.

By doing this, you are rested enough to have time to spend with your spouse. You won't be too tired to attend to the sexual needs of your husband.

8. Exercise

After delivery, your body can make you feel so unattractive. This is because your body has accommodated the baby's weight over the months. You’ve likely gained weight in all the wrong places. So, try to exercise to lose that baby weight. 

Most men usually do not know how women's bodies work. Some even expect it to be the same as it was before the pregnancy. While this ignorance is annoying, it can be excused. Men are moved by what they see. So, do your best to make your body physically appealing by exercising. 

Exercise can help burn the fat in the wrong places and bring out your feminine curves. This can build sexual feelings in your man. 

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

9. Quit complaining

quit complaining

It is easy to resent your man for not going through the same changes as you. He didn’t deal with swollen feet, hormonal changes, and other physical changes, etc. Your reasons are valid, but these are the sacrifices that come with being a mom. What’s more,  building resentment never solved anything in any relationship.

You might be tempted to whine at your spouse at every opportunity. But that might be a turn-off to him. This can strain the relationship between the two of you. If you just can’t stop complaining, you might be experiencing a symptom of postpartum depression. In that case, try to see a therapist or a professional counselor for help.

10. Communication

Communication is very necessary during this period. You should try to talk to your spouse. If you are engaged in something sexual, let your man know if you are in pain or if you are comfortable. Also, listen to your partner. 

Allow him the chance to pour out his fears. Most men (after experiencing the pain their wives go through) do not want to touch their wives after they have delivered. Your communicating can help to reassure them so that you two can build sexual intimacy from that point. And that can help build stability in your marriage.

11. Say no to insecurities

After what you’ve been through, it is so easy to give in to insecurities about your body and you as a whole. Refuse to give in to those feelings or thoughts. You are beautiful. You are strong. You chose the ultimate sacrifice to carry a child in your body. It is not an easy task. Recognize that! 

It is okay to be down for a while. But the most important thing is what you do afterwards. The best option is to remain positive. Get up and get your confidence suit on. Confidence is attractive. Every man is attracted to a confident woman. It does not matter how many scars you received after you delivered your first child. Once you are confident about your body, it is sexually stimulating.

FAQs

What can you do sexually after giving birth?

You should wait for four to six weeks before you have sex after giving birth. This is to avoid complications when delivering your child. However, you can engage in other sexual activities like oral sex or making out. 

How do I reconnect with my partner after having a baby?

To reconnect with your partner after having a baby, you are going to have to do the following: go on dates often, allow yourself to be assisted by him, enjoy more family time, and have patience with your partner.

Why am I so tight after having a baby?

According to studies, your pelvic floor muscles become longer when you are pregnant, to accommodate the baby growing inside you. Then, they stretch out when you are giving birth. Because of that, after birth, the said muscles tighten up. 

Can I get pregnant 2 weeks after giving birth?

No, but according to experts, you can get pregnant 3 weeks after giving birth, even if you are breastfeeding and your period is yet to come. 

Why am I so angry at my husband after having a baby?

Postpartum rage is quite normal in women after having a baby. Somehow, this is connected to postpartum depression. But it is completely understandable.  You were the one who went through the discomfort and pain to deliver the baby, while your partner walks around freely, not going through any pain. 

In Conclusion

To end with, being a new parent is a lot of work. But it is equally rewarding and should not interfere with the relationship you have with your husband. If anything, during the post-baby period, strive to make this work by adhering to the above ways you can satisfy your man after birth. This way, you’ll feel ready for any challenges ahead.

I hope you enjoyed reading this piece. Let me know what you think about it, and kindly share the article.

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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