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How to Let A Guy Know You Want to Hook Up (7 Ways You Can Make The First Move)

Last updated on September 21, 2022 by Sonya Schwartz

Women often ask me for advice when it comes to hooking up with guys. Ladies, let me tell you, it’s not rocket science. All you have to do is give off the right signals, to the right person, and your guy will pick up on your intentions

But you’d be surprised how many women don’t know what these signals are. Perhaps you’re afraid of coming across as a complete tart. You don’t want to be labeled the easy lay amongst your friends. 

Or maybe you don’t feel comfortable making the first move. What if he rejects you? That’s going to be really embarrassing. Or perhaps you are worried that he will think you want to start dating or begin a serious relationship. 

All of these things matter if you are interested in hooking up with a guy. 

If it’s just sex you want, then you can be as overtly sexual as you like. Why not just be truthful, send that booty call, and ask a guy straight out if he wants to hook up?

Then again, if you are hoping for some kind of relationship to blossom from your hook up you might want to be subtle. Use enticing body language to send the right signals. 

So before you go out and try the following techniques, think about what you want from the hook-up and how confident you feel. If it’s a first date and you want a relationship to form then perhaps hooking up the first time isn’t such a great idea. 

7 Ways to Let a Guy Know You Want to Hook Up

1. Create an opportunity to be alone with him.

Let’s face it, nobody goes into a bar or club on their own (unless it’s a speed dating event). We go out with our friends, but that can be intimidating for guys. After all, how would you feel approaching a pack of men to ask one of them to hook up?

Breakaway from your pack of girls. Create a chance for the two of you to have a conversation, flirt, and have a drink together. Go to the bar on your own or dance away from your friends a little. 

2. Be honest with him.

If you feel confident enough why not just ask a guy to hook up with you? Of course, you’ll want to find a sexier way of saying hook up. You could start with an invite in for coffee; making it clear you are not after coffee. 

Or why not ask him straight if he wants to have some fun? Guys love the direct approach. They are not good at picking up on very subtle hints. They are worried about misreading the signs and being rejected. 

So if you are at a party, take his hand and whisper ‘follow me’ whilst leading him to a bedroom. If you are on a night out in a bar, say ‘Do you want to go someplace quieter for some fun?’

Above all, don’t lead someone on and pretend you want a relationship or will date them. 

3. Flirt with him.

flirt with him

No guy will know that you are interested in hooking up if you don’t flirt with them. You can be as subtle and cute or as outrageous as you like. Play with your hair, and touch your necklace to draw his eyes to your breasts. 

Twiddle a drink stick and look him in the eyes. Get up close into his personal space. Lean up against him and use seductive words like ‘I’m feeling hot tonight’ or ‘Let’s get out of here’. 

4. Wear something sexy.

There are times when you can plan a hook-up. Other times they’ll happen at the moment. But if you know that a guy you like will be at a certain place you can prepare yourself.

Showing off a bit of cleavage is always a good idea. Guys love boobs so you can’t go wrong there. If you’re not confident about your breasts then highlight your butt with skin-tight bodycon dresses. Slim, toned, and bronzed legs will always grab a guy's attention, so pop on a skimpy skirt. 

Make sure your makeup is smoldering and looking hot. 

5. Be touchy-feely.

They say actions speak louder than words, and with guys, this is certainly true. With actions, there can be no misunderstanding. And the great thing is that you can be as forward, or as sensual, as you like. 

Grab his butt or his junk and look him in the eye when you do it. If you don’t want to be that intimate then a hand on his knee or shoulder tells the same story. 

The trick is to get close enough that you can smell him. Nuzzle and kiss his neck or whisper into his ear. Look into his eyes and run your tongue around your lips at the same time. 

6. Send a text message.

send a text message

Booty calls were invented just for this situation. Late-night texts when you’re feeling horny and want some company. The best part? You don’t have to go into detail. A quick ‘Heyyy hun’ with a few choice emojis or be blunt and text ‘U up? Wanna hook up?’ 

If you don’t want to be that obvious, you can tell him what you are wearing or say that you’ve been thinking about him all day.

7. Be confident, sexy, and in control.

Sexy is an attitude, not a look. Anyone can be sexy with the right amount of confidence. Remember, this is your sex life and your decision to hook up, so be that confident woman in control of the situation. 

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him.

Take this quick quiz to see if he actually likes you!

Don’t feel like a slut for wanting to hook up. It’s natural and amazing when women take control, and it makes guys feel wanted.

FAQs

How do you tell a guy you just wanna hook up?

Be direct and tell him. Honesty is always the best policy. So say from the start that this is fun and casual, and there are no strings attached. Use sexual body language to get his attention. Get him alone, away from his and your friends. Then get up close and personal and make your intentions known. 

How do you make someone want to hook up with you?

Flirt like crazy. You want them to know how you are feeling. Start off with ‘I’ve been thinking about us making out all day’ or ‘God, I really want to kiss you right now’. You can be as explicit as you dare, but remember to always be safe and know that even though you’ve instigated the sex if something happens and you want to stop, you have that right. 

How do you tell if a guy likes you or wants to sleep with you?

That’s a difficult question, and sometimes you won’t know the answer until you’ve slept with him. If sex is all he wants he’ll be very attentive in the short term until he gets what he wants. You might feel bombarded by his attention. If he likes you, he’ll be prepared to go more slowly or at your pace. 

How do you tell if your hookup has feelings for you?

It’s all about how they respond after the hook-up. Do they text or call after the hookups? Or do you only ever hear from them when they want to have sex? Does the topic revolve around sex and hooking up, or do you discuss other things that are going on in your life? If it’s all about sex and nothing else, then there’s your answer. 

How do you make a man want you and only you?

Men are attracted to women that have full and interesting lives. Just picture the kind of relationships you would like. Someone exciting and fun. Not some sad guy sitting by himself all miserable. Be confident, sassy, sexy, and above all – be yourself. Accentuate your good points and play down any flaws. Be the prize that a guy thinks is worth competing for. 

In Conclusion

Hookups can be messy and awkward, but they can also be great fun. And who knows – perhaps they might even lead to something more?

Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. You have to understand how he is wired. Once you do, you'll find there is a subtle thing you can say that to him that will drastically change how he shows his emotions towards you.

Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not!

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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