Having a crush on someone and being in love with someone might seem like the same thing when either one of these things is happening to you, but in fact, they couldn’t be more different.
It’s essential that you know what’s actually happening to you because having a crush on someone is a short-term feeling based on physical appearance and infatuation, whereas being in love with someone is a long-lasting, natural and deep connection with someone. It’s vital that you know what’s different between a crush and love so that you can actually move forward in a way that’s best for you.
So, are you confused about whether you have a crush on someone or if you’re actually falling in love with somebody?
If so, look no further! This article is here to give you all the help you need in finding out if you’ve got a crush, or you’re in love by looking at the differences of each.
Let’s dive straight in and check out the 23 differences when it comes to crush vs love.
Table of Contents
If you feel romantically interested in somebody the moment you see them, sometimes even before you’ve interacted with them, this is most likely a crush because it’s an instant feeling of infatuation, but you could believe that it’s love at first sight. Although love-at-first-sight can exist, true love typically takes time to grow and blossom between two people.
If you have a crush on somebody, you feel mainly attracted to them because of their physical features and sex appeal, whereas when you are in love with somebody you fall in love with them as a person and their appearance means a lot less.
When you have a crush you get infatuated with somebody, meaning that you get almost obsessed with them and think about them all the time. However, when you’re in love with someone, this person doesn’t consume your thoughts but becomes part of them.
Crushes typically only last a few weeks, with the infatuation leaving you just as quickly as it got to you. However, love, even if it doesn’t last forever, lasts a lot longer because it goes deeper than a purely physical connection.
One of the main differences when looking at crush vs love is that with a crush you get caught up with the idea of a person rather than falling for the actual person.
Crushes often feel so intense because the waves of emotions come and go so strongly, playing with your emotions and often causing you real emotional trauma. However, loving somebody isn’t game-like and there’s much less chaos in your mind.
You desperately want to impress your crush, so you act like a completely different person around them, but in love, you can just be yourself 100% and feel comfortable in the knowledge you’re showing your authentic self.
Having a crush on somebody plays with your mind, it feels like you’re out of control and it takes over your life by giving you such intense feelings for a short period of time, whereas love feels gentle and natural, almost as if it was all meant to be.
An important difference between a crush and love is that due to the fact a crush is based on physical attraction and idealization, its surface level and never really lights up your soul. However, when you love someone you create a deep connection with them and you’ll never experience the same thing with another person like that.
You’re not showing your true colors around a crush so you feel on edge all of the time that you’re around them, but with love, it’s like you’ve come home and you’re 100% comfortable and at ease.
When you’re crushing on someone you’re always aware of the fact that things will most likely come to an end, but when you’re in true love with someone you have a feeling in your heart knowing that things will last.
When you have a crush on somebody you’ll be self-conscious around them, always concerned with what you look like, what you're saying, and whether you’re making a good impression or not. However, when you’re in love, you can feel confident just being yourself.
When you’re around the person you have a crush on you’ll feel nervous and often quite scared to even speak to them, but when you’re in love you feel calm, uplifted, and able to openly communicate.
Although you might think having a crush on somebody is all fun and games, it’s often really mentally draining because you’re so infatuated by somebody that you can’t focus on anything else and it drains all your energy. On the other hand, love builds you up, gives you energy, and boosts you in all aspects of your life.
You idealize someone that you have a crush on and therefore you set expectations of what they should be like or how they should act, and a lot of the time these expectations aren’t even realistic. When you’re in love, you don’t expect anything, you just appreciate the person.
When you crush on somebody it’s because you want them to notice you, see you, most likely pleasure you, and have an intimate relationship with you - all of these things are selfish. When you’re in love, you act selflessly and always want to make the other person happy.
Due to the fact you’re not exclusive with your crush or you might not even have any kind of relationship with them, you can easily get jealous. However, when you’re in love with somebody, you speak about the exclusivity of the relationship and feel comfortable knowing the ground rules with this person.
Infatuation plays a huge part in having a crush on somebody, and this can easily be destroyed by something as small as your crush saying the wrong thing or looking bad. However, in love, no issue is usually too big to work through.
You fantasize and idealize a crush and therefore you won’t actually think about their feelings, whereas when you’re in love, that’s pretty much all you think about because you want to make that person happy.
You can crush on somebody from afar, or you can even have some kind of relationship with your crush, but whatever happens, you definitely live two very separate lives. In love, you live life together as a team.
One of the main differences when looking at love vs crush is the fact that you can have multiple crushes at the same time, but you normally only love one person at one time. This is because crushing on somebody doesn’t actually require any type of commitment, but loving somebody does.
Crushing on somebody makes you feel all giddy and excited like a kid, but love makes you feel ready for life as an adult because it’s empowering and exciting to think about the future with somebody.
Probably the most important difference looking at love vs crush is that expectations of your crush are never met, but when you’re in love with someone, they exceed even your wildest expectations.
When talking about love and relationships, a crush is a certain feeling you have towards somebody, typically due to the physical attraction you have towards them. You will feel infatuated with this person, your mind will become consumed with thoughts of them and you’ll want them, even if you can’t necessarily have them. You will probably confuse a crush and love, so this article should help you figure out what’s really going on.
You could technically start to fall in love with your crush, but you wouldn’t feel like you had a crush anymore, you would feel like it was love. For example, you wouldn’t be selfish and not care about their feelings, but you would be selfless and want them to be happy. If you think you’re falling in love with your crush, take a look at the 23 points above and see which parts resonate with you best.
If you’re falling in love with somebody, you will rarely actually go through the crush stage because you’re too interested in them as a person and you’re eager to get to know them for who they are, whereas a crush is based on physical appearance and idealization. However, if you feel like you have a crush on somebody for more than four months, you may actually be in love.
Obviously, love is a feeling you have for someone, but having feelings for someone and being in love with someone is completely different. You can have romantic or sexual feelings towards somebody without being in love with them.
If you have a crush on somebody you are attracted to them in both a physical and romantic way, however, it’s more about physical attraction. When you have a crush on somebody you become infatuated by them, meaning that a lot of the time, thoughts of them take over your mind and you lose control of yourself.
Hopefully, after reading this article you’re all clued up on the differences between having a crush and actually being in love with somebody. Remember, love feels natural and it’s about connecting with someone on a deep and meaningful level, whereas a crush is surface level and based on physical attraction.
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