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How To Tell Someone You Like Them Over Text (21 No-Frills Ways)

by Sonya Schwartz

Sending a text to your crush can be nerve-wracking especially if the two of you don’t talk face to face regularly. Even more agitating is the thought of sending a text that you like him. This is normally out of the fear of rejection, or that things might be different between the two of you afterward. To ensure everything goes smoothly while getting your text message across, you’ll need a guide to put you through

This article contains the most insightful tips on how to tell someone you like them over text, ensuring you don’t mess up your moment. More importantly, you will be able to handle the outcome perfectly. 

21 Ways To Tell Someone You Like Them Over Text

1. Be clear about why you want to say to them

Telling someone you like them comes with a lot of expectations. However, being clear on what you’re after will help you get your mind right. Do you want to have a relationship with him in the future, or do you simply want your crush to like you back without commitment? 

Let’s say he says yes, your expectation will keep you prepared for the future. You’ll be able to plan better and communicate your feelings every step of the way. This will also prevent you from having spontaneous expectations, which will definitely overwhelm him. 

2. Ensure he has your attention

A common mistake many people make when thinking of how to tell someone they like them over text is sending messages at any time of the day. In such a scenario, you’re leaving way too much room for him to think about the situation. This will likely cause him to say something like ‘why are you texting me so much?’ 

If you really want to get him to react positively to your text, then make sure you have his attention first. You can slide your text in the midst of a conversation, not when there’s no conversation. Say something like, ‘I was just passing by’, or drop an interesting tidbit. You want to ensure that he is in a good mood, and thinking about you at that moment, before you break the ice to them.

3. Start slowly

This step correlates with starting a conversation first rather than blurting out your feelings. You need to start slowly and build up at that moment. You can start by hinting that you have something to reveal. This will lessen the impact of the shock he’ll feel, and possibly lessen your chances of receiving a dissatisfying response. Even if he says something a bit off, you didn't reveal all your cards. 

The most important thing you want to note is that you don’t want to overwhelm him. If you’re wondering how to let someone know you like them perfectly, then the key remains to build your presence slowly, and wait for the right moment.

4. Keep it simple

You want your text message to be clear and easily understandable. You shouldn’t leave room for thousands of possible responses, which will easily overwhelm him. Keeping it simple is one easy way to push things towards getting positive feedback. 

Don’t make your sentences too vague that it may require him to ask further questions before understanding perfectly. Ask simple yes or no questions, and this will limit the number of possible responses, and also get your point across accordingly.  

5. Don’t use abbreviations

Texting someone leaves a lot of room for interpretation, as opposed to saying something in person. When you’re texting him for the first time, or perhaps, wondering how to tell someone you like them, it’s important to be precise with every word you use. 

In order to do this, you will definitely need to cut back on most of the abbreviations you use, and stick to plain grammar. Make sure you write your sentences in full and avoid using chat-slangs because he might not understand them. 

This will command his attention to the fullest, and avoid you missing your shot when you have it. Understand there will be enough room to express yourself later, but your first impression when breaking the ice matters a lot.

6. Don’t declare your love

It’s understandable that you really like your crush, and words can’t describe how you feel when you see him. Though these feelings are good, if you’re thinking how to tell someone why you like them, you should never give out this much detail. Only communicate an idea of what you feel and not everything in descript details. 

Don’t let him know how they make you feel when you see them, or that you’re even in love with them (even if you are). This will probably scare your crush, and make the situation seem awkward. More time will eventually come to express your emotions, but you have to give him enough room to assimilate the fact that you like them first. 

7. Time your text

Time your text

Like explained earlier, if you’re wondering how to tell someone you like them over text, then having his attention is important. To ensure you properly accomplish this, it’s best to avoid the long waiting period as a whole. 

Waiting too long before your crush finally responds will make you overthink, and possibly take a wrong step. Apart from having his attention, make sure you time your text in accordance with your crush’s schedule. By now, there’s a high chance you already know when he’s likely to check his messages and respond as soon as possible. Use this opportunity. 

8. Try to flirt

Try to flirt if you’re wondering how to tell someone you like them. This will be a great starting point. Say something like, “you have a nice haircut,” or “the outfit you wore the other day looked nice.” With this, you’ve gotten his attention and created the perfect atmosphere to begin. 

You can decide to do this over a period of time, before finally revealing your feelings to your crush. This will work best if you’re quite close to him. If you’re not, then do this in the very same conversation that leads up to the big moment. Also, try not to be too intense when flirting, and simply keep everything on a casual note.  

9. Ask him on a date

Asking your partner out on a date is an alternative to telling him that you like him. It’ll be a big confidence boost if you actually pull this off. As explained earlier, you shouldn’t leave too much room for different possible responses. Keeping your text direct and simple like asking him on a date, is an option you should consider. 

You’re making him know that you’re interested in him without necessarily overwhelming him with the reality of what you’re feeling. This also presents an avenue for you to prepare how to break the ice and really let him know how you feel. 

When asking him out on a date, ensure that your intentions are clear and that you’re not hiding under the guise of hanging out, or else it would still be too surprising when you reveal things to him. 

10. Don’t be evasive

You now have his attention, but suddenly, you’re scared about the outcome. This can make you evasive. You’re trying to flirt, but you’re also not trying to make it too obvious or to ensure your crush doesn’t understand your words directly. It doesn’t matter how bad the situation may seem, don’t do this. 

This will only make him see you as overly playful, and he will not consider your words the next time. You have only one shot to prove you’re bold and courageous enough to go for what you want – so don’t miss that opportunity. More so, don’t try to play games with him to lessen the blow of rejection. Instead, take on the challenge with confidence.  

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11. Don’t immediately send follow-up texts

When thinking of how to tell someone you like them over text, the first thing that pops into your mind is how to avoid sounding desperate. You want to be able to effectively communicate your heart to him, but not to make them think you hopelessly can’t do without him. In order to accomplish this, you’re going to need to appear confident to him. 

If you really want to show confidence, avoid the common mistake of a sudden followup text to him, when he doesn’t reply fast. Give him as much time as possible, because this will be a determining factor if he doesn’t respond with something positive. You’ll still be able to hold your head up high nonetheless, as opposed to sending back a mortifying text.

12. Calm your nerves

This part is essential when you’re not getting a response from him as fast as you’d like. You’ve sent the text five minutes ago, and your crush still hasn’t responded. Well, if you’re really wondering how to tell someone you like them over text the right way, then you should preoccupy yourself after you’ve sent the text. This will help calm your nerves. 

Think of how long it took for you to create the text, and allow that to pacify your nerves about why it’s taking him so long. You should give him a lot of time to respond, but if he still hasn’t replied in hours, then you know he’s probably ghosting the conversation. 

13. Double-check

You’ve already prepared everything to send to him, and you’re probably already nervous about the outcome. You’re thinking of how fast you can get everything out of the way; but before you hit the send button, ensure you double-check everything. 

You don’t want to end up saying something that’s totally off point from what you’re trying to say. Even more mortifying, you shouldn’t end up sending the text to the wrong person. 

The most important thing to do when wondering how to tell someone that you like them is to calm down and crosscheck everything. The calmer your feelings are, the clearer you’re going to think. This will prevent you from making any mistakes you’ll probably regret.

14. Talk to your friends about it

You may have dismissed the idea of telling your friends you want to let a person know you are into them, but the truth is, telling your friends might actually help. The nervous feelings would definitely be calmed, just knowing you have someone who’s backing you up, and cheering you on. 

More so, thinking from only one perspective might make you miss some crucial details. Since you’re overly concerned about the situation, you might need the help of someone who’s relatively calm about the matter, so that the outcome can be better. 

Ensure you talk to someone who’s genuinely concerned about seeing your progress, and not anyone who will give you bad advice. 

15. Also consider not telling anyone

Also consider not telling anyone

This might sound rather contradictory to the last point, but if you really want to know how to tell someone you like them the perfect way, then sometimes, keep the details to yourself. You may not necessarily have anyone who will give you good advice, and that’s fine. To avoid a scenario where you’re desperately looking for someone to tell, also bear in mind that keeping everything to yourself might even make you bolder to take on the challenge. 

In life, there will be certain occurrences we hope to forget as soon as possible, especially unpleasant ones. This will not be possible with a lot of people knowing about it. Some friends might constantly remind you of the event. More so, if the word gets out, trying to make everyone forget will be an impossible task. 

16. Think about the outcome

It’s certain that you’ve thought about what would happen if he gives you some positive feedback when you express your feelings to him. Nevertheless, it’s also important to think of the possible negative outcome. Having a backup plan will ensure you don’t end up feeling bad about the entire process. If he says something like, 'I'm not interested', or anything harsher, it won't be as embarrassing. 

It will boost your confidence, and allow you to embrace tomorrow confidently. In order to do this, think of what you’ll say if they don’t respond positively. You can decide to act nonchalant, or perhaps, not even reply back immediately. Try to plan out whatever worthwhile reaction that will make you feel better in the long run. 

17. Lower your expectations

If you want to feel less disappointed by any possible outcome, then you have to lower your expectations to the barest minimum. If the outcome is positive, then you can rise up from the point of your low expectations. 

On the contrary, if the outcome is negative, and they don’t like you back, you will not crash as much as having high expectations. This is the secret to remaining confident even after you get rejected. Try to focus more on the fact that you did something great, and made yourself proud in the process.

18. Don’t contemplate your text

Keep in mind that the person you like, already knows whether he likes your back, even before you send the text. He also knows whether anything could happen between both of you and if there’s any form of attraction. Your text will not spontaneously change his mind, so don’t contemplate it too much. 

Also understand that your text is simply going to bring clarity to the situation, and not persuade him to like you. Whatever the outcome is, know that it wasn’t your text that premeditated it, but simply how things were. 

19. Understand that you won’t lose anything

Everyone inevitably has a crush at one point; however, this doesn’t always remain a determining factor for everything. If things go well, you can start a nice relationship. On the contrary, if you find out he is not interested, you’ll definitely know it’s time to move on. 

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In the long run, you’ll appreciate that one bad crush didn’t prevent the perfect person from coming into your life. Although everything may revolve around your feeling for him now, understand that in the long run, you still have nothing to lose once you tell someone you like how you really feel. The most essential thing you’ll be getting is clarity, which is needed for progress. So don’t fret too much. 

20. Contain your excitement

If you find out that he likes you back, one essential thing to remember is that you need to contain your excitement. You shouldn’t go off telling him all your future expectations or heart desires when the two of you haven’t started your journey yet. 

You may have great plans for the future, but you should definitely keep this to yourself in the meantime. Don’t ruin the surprise, because that can end up turning him off. Allow him to embrace each stage as it comes, without feeling too overwhelmed. He could get defensive if you push too hard and you won't feel nice if he says something like that. This will generally affect a lot of things.

21. Don’t force a relationship just yet

Don’t force a relationship just yet

Things are going smoothly, but nothing is official yet. He has confessed that he likes you, but you’re not certain where the both of you stand. The truth is, it’s not entirely about the relationship status, but about growing together to build something beautiful. Know that this would only work when you don’t rush things.  

You may know him quite well, but he also needs time to get to know you and consider what a good relationship will be like. Therefore, you need to allow everything to take a natural turn. Focus on the process rather than things becoming official. 

FAQs

How do you tell your crush you like them over text?

There are many ways to confess your feelings to the person you like. However, try to keep things as simple as possible without overwhelming him/her. 

Is it OK to tell someone you like them over text?

It is rather easy to let a person know you like them over text, as opposed to face-to-face. You have the opportunity to duly prepare, which you should fully embrace.

How do u tell ur crush u like them?

It's good to try to start a conversation first. If you’re wondering how to tell someone you like them over text. This will keep things light and will make him/her embrace your feelings much better.

How do you tell someone you like them in a cute way?

If you’re thinking how to tell someone you like them in a cute way, then try casually flirting with them first, and allow the conversation to blossom from there.

How do I drop hints to my crush?

You can drop hints to your crush by casually complementing great aspects about them. You can also ask him/her on a date, to open the floor to tell them how you feel. 

To Summarize

Did you enjoy this article on tips to tell someone you like them? Prepare for any possible outcome, and never let the negative one affect your self-esteem. Kindly leave a comment below, and share this article with someone else you know will benefit from something like this. 

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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