Getting into a relationship can be the most exhilarating feeling ever. You feel like you’re starting over, and the universe is finally aligning things in your favor. Of course, that’s until reality comes crashing and you realize your friends hate your partner!
What a bummer right? The truth is, once you get into a romantic relationship, you want your friends to be excited as you are.
No one wants negativity, resentment, anger, tension, or awkwardness to cloud their new perfect world. The first thing that comes to mind is jealousy, and that’s not always the case. The truth is, sometimes, friends see the red flags you may not see in a relationship.
That’s because an outside eye may take note of weird behavior that you may be overlooking when trying to make things work. However, friends can also be the naysayers making you feel like you’re making wrong decisions in all your relationships.
So, if you’re tired of all the attitude and wondering why your closest friends and partner can’t just get along, here are a few reasons why.
When you get into a new relationship, things change. Your time, vibe, and conversation. Your friends have to sit down and listen to you gush about how you no longer eat cheese or like a certain musician. Such changes make things seem fishy. Maybe they feel this guy is changing you and they don’t like that at all.
Yes, some friends honestly just prefer your ex. If they really bonded with the former guy, they may still be rooting for both of you. That makes it easy to hate anyone that threatens the possibility of a make-up.
Are your friends still single? If they are not, how are their relationships going? Let’s be honest, it can be hard to watch your friend being happy while still searching for happiness. Of course, in a healthy friendship, the opposite is expected. A friend should be happy and not envious of your progress.
However, misery loves company, and if your friends see that you’re doing well without them, that could spur jealousy.
Is it possible that your partner doesn’t like your friends too? Sometimes, friends respond to the energy they receive. If this guy is a bit standoffish to them, they’ll certainly want to respond with the same energy. At this point, they may not want you to choose between their friendship and this relationship.
However, they probably don’t like the vibe they are getting from him and see that as an obvious red flag.
Sometimes, we find ourselves in a sticky situation without knowing it. The people who are usually there to dig us out are friends. Friends will always want to have your back. So, when they find out you are dating a guy they have dirt on, that’s already a salty situation. Maybe they know this guy’s ex or a friend who knows another friend.
If all they have heard about this guy is negative, they certainly won’t want anything to do with him.
Friendship goes beyond sharing secrets, being loyal, and hanging out. It also entails being there for each other. .in this case, if you listen carefully and objectively, you may find your friends have valid reasons for hating this guy. Here’s the thing, when you are in love, it’s easy to get blinded by it.
You may find yourself extending the boundaries previously set just to accommodate this guy’s excesses. It’s probably hard for your friends to see you in that situation. However, since they have to respect your wishes, they simply stick to detesting him.
“All my friends dislike my new man.” That’s a sentence I have heard many times. For some reason, I find many of them do this because they feel their friend can do better. If you really listen to their words when they are talking, you’ll fully understand the reason they are hating.
Sometimes, friends sense a red flag way before you do. Maybe they have seen you argue a lot, or find that you’re constantly making excuses for his excesses. The fact that they can’t get you to see that will make your friends dislike your man.
At this point, they want you to stop and listen to how this guy is way below your type.
Just remember, if he is a good, loving, and respectful guy, kindly tell them off and stick to your man.
The reason why your friends may dislike your partner could be a reflection of their own fears. You see, even though you’ve found the right partner, it will be hard to persuade a friend who has already classified him as a douche. You know how people classify different men as either cheats, liars, abusers, users, playboys, and the likes?
That could be happening here. Let’s say this guy is an artist, a friend that has unsuccessfully dated an artist before will certainly be wary. They may use their own past experiences with ‘such men’ to judge your new man.
While this is crude and totally uncalled for, they may just be acting on their fears and thus, judging him too harshly.
Okay, so you know ladies can be very unforgiving when they want to. So you have to consider the first time they met your new boyfriend. How did things go? It’s possible that the timing just wasn’t right, or something happened that made them blacklist him.
Remember that first impressions matter. If they met your new man when he was grumpy or not just in his best mood/behavior, that could have been the deal-breaker. You could try to convince your friends that it was bad timing and this guy is really great. If that doesn’t work, try setting up another meeting with everyone, and hope things go better this time.
Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
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There are a few reasons why your friends would react negatively to a new partner. Keep in mind that relationships go beyond just being nice to one another. If these people truly have your best interests at heart, they will be very protective of them. If they feel that this new guy isn’t right for you, there’s no way your friends will like him. They could also just be suspicious, jealous, or have information about him that you are not yet privy to.
It’s very important to treat this case delicately. If you don’t want to lose your friends, and still want to date this guy then avoid conflict at all cost. First of all, ask your friend(s) the main issue they have with your new relationship. Treating this matter from the root will help you stay rational throughout. Also, take some time to monitor your man and evaluate the relationship. Is there anything you’re dismissing or overlooking? At the end of the day, if nothing’s really wrong, you may have to find a way to balance your relationship with your partner and your friends.
There are a few signs to look out for when you get into a new relationship. Do your friends act fake around the guy, or avoid talking to him altogether? They may not like him. Plus, if they avoid both of you in social gatherings and make fun of him way too often, that also means they dislike him.
It feels good when our friends not only approve of a guy we’re dating but also like him too. It’s like an added advantage, but not necessarily a priority. However, if you are a person that holds close friends’ opinions in high esteem, it may be more important. At the end of the day, if a guy treats you right and shows love and care, it shouldn’t matter what anyone else thinks. It may be awkward at first, but if the relationship lasts, they’ll get used to it.
As much as having a partner who gets along with your friends is awesome, it’s not always plausible. Your friends and even family may not always agree with your choices. However, even when their friendship means so much to you, it’s important to be honest and fair to yourself. If you love this man, then it shouldn’t matter if he gets along with your friends. However, it will really be great if all parties make an effort to get along.
I hope it was helpful going through this list. It’s always a pleasure to talk about unconventional yet important things that many people overlook. Remember, some friendships may be forever, but they are not worth losing a good guy over. However, before cutting off all your friends or acting malicious towards them, find out the reason for their behavior. Their reasons for disliking your partner may be valid.
Have any thoughts on the topic? I would love to hear them. Kindly leave a comment below and share this with others who may need it. Cheers and good luck.
Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
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