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How To Make A Guy Realize He's Losing You (23 Things To Try)

Last updated on August 31, 2022 by Sonya Schwartz

Are you fed up with a particular guy putting no effort into pleasing you?

Are you looking for subtle ways to communicate that you want him to try harder? 

Perhaps you’re searching for the best way to show him he’s losing your interest? 

If so, you’re in the right place. The guide below contains 23 fantastic ideas for showing a man he’s losing you.  

However, before I reveal these tips, it’s really important that you read the following sentences carefully. 

I wasted most of my twenties chasing guys who just weren’t that into me. 

It was a worrying pattern that I thought was never going to end. I thought there was something seriously wrong with me. 

It turned out that I just didn’t know to make a lasting emotional impact on men. 

Thankfully, that all changed when I learned about a little-known aspect of male psychology called the ‘Hero’s Instinct’.

This powerful psychological trigger has a huge impact on how men perceive the women in their life. 

In fact, it can be the difference between being seen as a ‘bit of fun’ or as an OBSESSION. 

Once I learned how to activate this line of thinking inside a man, my relationships quickly became a lot more passionate and caring (I wrote this personal story to explain how it works). 

A man’s ‘Hero’s Instinct’ is reasonably simple to activate, once you understand how it works. The crazy thing is: so few people seem to understand how it works.  

If you’re also stuck wondering why men aren’t putting the effort into impressing you, I’d urge you to read more about how the ‘Hero’s Instinct’ changed my love life

There are some more useful ideas to reignite a man’s interest below. 

Make A Guy Realize He’s Losing You

Most of the time, guys are a bit clueless when it comes to understanding what’s going on with women, including the woman that they are in a relationship with. 

He can be a day away from losing you, and still have no clue that you’re about to leave his life forever. It could be that you’re not giving him hints that are strong enough for him to pick up on. 

If you want to make him realize that you’re about to pack your bags, you need to make sure that you’re doing the right things to force him to open his eyes. If you keep pretending like everything is fine, he’s going to have the impression that everything is fine. That’s why you need to follow these tips to help him realize that there’s a problem. 

1. Start packing your things

Tell him that you just need a break. You’re going to go spend the weekend at your mom’s house to think about some things. Nothing will give a guy a wake-up call like the thought of you not being there anymore. While this is drastic, it can definitely work. However, you might want to try some other ideas if you’re trying to avoid a dramatic argument with your man. 

2. Tell mutual friends

He might tune you out if you say something. If you’ve tried to talk about things with him, and he doesn’t seem to hear, tell a few of your friends that you’re thinking about calling it quits. They will tell him, and he won’t tune it out. If he does, they might be able to help you out by giving him a wake-up call. This is one of the easiest ways to make him realize he’s losing you. 

3. Make him make his own dinner

A common argument is that a woman feels like she has to do everything. The easiest way to solve this argument and get him to realize that he may be losing you is to simply stop doing it. He’ll wonder what’s going on within a few days. This will also make him realize how much you do for him that he’s taking for granted. 

4. Give him a dose of his own medicine

Whatever he’s been doing, start doing it right back. Treat him the exact way that he’s been treating you. When he tries to talk to you about your behavior, let him know that he has been making you feel that way. Sometimes, guys need something more than conversation for a guy to realize how he’s making you feel. 

5. Ignore his phone calls

Don’t reject them or send them straight to voicemail. Instead, simply let the phone ring or put your phone on silent. If you can’t resist answering the phone, put it on silent and leave it in your purse. He’ll start to wonder what you’re doing and what’s wrong after you don’t answer the phone a few times. 

6. Give him the silent treatment

Typically, I prefer to recommend that you sit down in a healthy environment to practice communicating with each other in order to solve problems. However, some guys just don’t get it. It can take something a bit more to make them open their eyes, and that’s where the silent treatment comes in. It won’t take him very long to realize that something is going on. 

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him.

Take this quick quiz to see if he actually likes you!

However, you might have to follow some other tips in this article to make him realize he’s losing you. He may just think that you’re mad at him. 

7. Post pictures on social media

Don’t forget to accept a few guy’s friend requests before you do. He’ll instantly feel protective once he realizes how many other guys want you. 

If this is new behavior for you, it will also make a guy realize that you might be looking elsewhere for attention. Thinking about you with someone else will make him realize that he’s got the best woman in the world, and how much he loves you

8. Quit putting all the energy into things

When we see something we think is broken, we tend to want to fix it. We start conversations when there is a problem. Deep down, we have great intentions, but this can cause a problem for our relationships. 

It teaches guys that are with us that they don’t have to do anything. If there’s a problem, we’ll address it. Because of that, it can take a moment for him to realize there is something wrong, or he will assume that everything is fine because you didn’t say anything. 

Not only that, but he also doesn’t have to deal with any responsibilities. Consider having an open conversation with him about how you feel first. The best relationship advice is always to have healthy communication. Then, follow up by not doing things that you shouldn’t be doing. This will also make your life easier.

9. Start wearing your own clothes

start wearing your own clothes

Sometimes, you need to just switch things up to make a guy realize that there’s a problem. If you’re always wearing his hoodies, leave them in the closet and start wearing your things for a while. He’ll miss how adorable you look in oversized sweatshirts. Subtle ways like this are great, but keep in mind sometimes it takes things a bit more drastic to make him realize something is off in your relationship or that he’s going to lose you. 

10. Tell him you’re losing interest

Sometimes, you need to be a bit blunt with men for them to get the picture. Subtle hints just might not work. If you’ve tried everything to make a guy realize he’s losing you and he doesn’t seem to notice, either he doesn’t care or he doesn’t know what’s going on. You need to specifically tell him what is going on, and why you feel the way you do. If he wants to be in a relationship with you, he’ll try to fix it with you.

11. Show him you can manage perfectly fine without him

Men tend to take a woman for granted a tad more when they think she needs him. Make your boyfriend realize that you don’t need him as much as he thinks that you do. This tactic can also make a guy realize that he’s losing you because he’ll see you doing so much without him. 

12. Enjoy your own social life

The way to get him to start worrying is to stop worrying. Enjoy spending time with your friends. Start having a girl’s night out. This alone can make him realize just how much he loves you because you won’t be around as often. 

13. Let him do his own laundry

Sometimes, you need to just quit. Quit stressing about the relationship. Quit doing everything for everyone. Quit doing his laundry. Men are more than capable of putting clothing in the washer and dryer themselves. When you stop doing the things that he doesn’t like doing, he’ll start appreciating you a bit more. This can make him realize just how much you do around the house, too.

14. Spend time with male friends

Nothing can quite make a man worry like you going out to have fun with another man. If you already have a male friend, go see a movie with him. 

Be wary about making new male friends, however. This can make it look like you’re cheating, and it’s not always the best way to make a man jealous. Instead, you want him to realize you’re desirable to other men while still letting him know that you’re all his. Make sure that you keep that balance when using this tactic to make him realize that you could be with someone else, but you chose to be with him. 

15. Make your own decisions

It’s common to ask your partner their opinion on something. You may ask him before doing something to make sure that it doesn’t bother him, for example. Instead, it’s time to start doing everything on your own. 

This tactic will make him feel a little left out of your life, and he’ll start to miss you. Once he starts to miss you, he might start thinking about what life would be like without you. Sometimes, that’s all it takes to make him open his eyes. 

16. Withholding sex

Usually, modern relationships are all about healthy communication. Some men simply don’t have that, won’t work towards that, and don’t get it. In that case, not giving it up in the bedroom could be exactly what you need to get him to realize that something is not going well in the relationship and that he needs to make some changes. 

17. Cancel plans

When you cancel on him at the last moment, it can make him realize that you were being serious when you said something was bothering you. We, women, tend to always want to put our best foot forward for our men, but sometimes that’s the problem. You need to take action if you want to make a man realize that he also needs to do something about a situation. 

18. Stop responding

stop responding

Instead of a full-blown silent treatment, just don’t respond to his texts for a little bit. Sometimes, even when you’re in a relationship, it’s important to not always be available to him. It will make him miss you. He’ll start thinking about what could possibly be wrong. This is all that he needs to start to slowly realize that he might be losing you. 

19. Put in more effort

While the other tactics will work, they won’t work on every grown man. Instead of pulling away from the relationship, do the opposite

Bring out the hopeless romantic inside of him with a mini holiday vacation. Plan a romantic dinner for two at his favorite restaurant. Cook his favorite meals. 

Another great idea is to start putting forth more effort in the bedroom. Learn some new moves or break out his favorites. Start with things that you know he’ll love!

This is effective because it reminds him of how amazing you are. Once he starts thinking about how much he loves you, and all of the things that you do, he won’t be able to stand the thought of you being with any other guy. 

20. Pick up a new hobby

If you don’t want to flat out ignore him or start drama, but still want to make him miss you so he’ll realize what he’s got, finding something to do is a very subtle way to accomplish that. You can’t respond to his messages because you’re busy. He knows what you’re doing so there’s no reason to be insecure. However, you still won’t be there to cook dinner or devote all of your time to him. 

21. Spend some quality time away from him

If taking a new pottery class isn’t up your alley, consider doing something else to get away. Do something without him. Go on a road trip with friends or family. As a bonus, you won’t have to withhold sex because you won’t be there to give him any anyway. 

While you’re gone, forget to respond to text messages. If he texts instantly put your phone down for an hour or two before responding. He might feel uneasy and be irritated, but he’ll also realize that he’s very much in love with you. 

Then, when you get back home, implement a few other strategies to make sure that you can get him to realize he is losing you. He’ll start making an effort because he doesn’t want to lose you. 

22. Go back to the beginning

Remember when the two of you first started dating? He was slowly falling in love with you. Think about all those things he loved about you. Remember how the two of you used to be with one another. Men fall in love with certain things about women, and it’s important to remember what those things were if you’re going to put your best efforts towards getting him to change

Then, try to recreate that same feeling to bring the romance back into the relationship. Go on a date night. Stop talking about work all the time. In the beginning, you wanted to seem fun and interesting, and it’s important to maintain that in the relationship. The more that you do now than you did at the beginning of the relationship, the more he will start to fall in love with you again. 

Then, you can either discuss what needs to change in the relationship or employ other tactics to make him realize he is losing you. 

23. Put a lot of effort into your appearance

It’s common for everyone, including us girls, to stop getting dolled up once the honeymoon phase is over. We simply start feeling comfortable. If that sounds like you, it’s time to break out the eyeliner. Start wearing your makeup every day. Do your hair. Get your nails done. Buy a few new outfits. 

Then, when your boyfriend asks why you’re doing all of this, just tell him it’s because you want to. He’ll think you’re doing it for another man, even though you aren’t. It will instantly make him start to wonder if he’s slowly losing you to someone else. 

However, be prepared for a little bit of jealousy and insecurity with this tactic. It’s bound to make him feel some type of way. 

FAQs

How do I make him worry about losing me?

Make him worry about losing you by showing off how great you are. Spice up your love life in the bedroom. Take care of him like no one else will. If you already do that, take the opposite route and stop doing things for him. That means no more cooking his dinner or doing his laundry. 

How do I make him realize my value?

In order to make a guy realize your value, you have to show him what you do for him. Stop bringing so much to the table. Ask him to pitch in on bills if you cover them all. Stop taking care of him and doing so much around the house. It won’t take him long to realize just how much you do for him. 

How do you make him realize he's wrong?

Create a safe place for communication. That means you should both be able to talk without fear of judgment. Then, explain your perspective of things calmly. Let him know how you feel, and why something is important to you. Instead of focusing on who’s right, focus on solving the problem together. 

How do you make a guy regret taking you for granted?

The easiest way to do this is to leave. Leave him for good or for a little while. Go on a vacation for a week without him. Tell him you need some time with the girls or that your family needs your help. Once you’re gone, he’ll start to realize just how wonderful life is because you’re in it. 

How do you know he doesn't care about you?

He won’t make an effort. If you leave to go on vacation, he won’t call. Instead of realizing he’s about to lose you, he simply won’t care. A guy that doesn’t care won’t take care of you when you’re sick and won’t pitch in when you need his help. More than anything, he seems indifferent to your feelings. 

In Conclusion

Sometimes, men can be clueless. This includes when you are about to emotionally check out of a relationship. What are some other ways that you can help a man realize that he’s about to lose you?

Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. You have to understand how he is wired. Once you do, you'll find there is a subtle thing you can say that to him that will drastically change how he shows his emotions towards you.

Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not!

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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