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Childhood Sweetheart (21 Things To Expect When You Date Or Marry Your Childhood Sweetheart)

by Sonya Schwartz

The idea of marrying your high school classmate or childhood sweetheart who put the first set of butterflies in your belly usually seems like some fairytale to many people. I guess because the ideal and practical plan is usually graduating from college, finding a great job and then, searching for someone to settle down with. 

The truth is, many couples are either dating their childhood sweethearts, in love with them, or are married to them. If you’re in love with that boy or girl from school and curious what the future might hold, here’s a list of twenty-one things to expect when you date or marry your childhood sweetheart.

21 Things To Expect When You Date Or Marry Your Childhood Sweetheart

1. He knows your weaknesses

Relationships and marriages are tough for everyone, despite how long you’ve both known each other. And because we are human beings, we have flaws that, in a new relationship, may be difficult to contend with. This is especially true when it’s behaviors that your husband has never experienced. 

However, in dating or marrying your childhood sweetheart, he’s very well aware of your weaknesses and flaws. It could even be that he’s the one that pointed out a number of them to you. This allows for easier understanding and a bit fewer arguments. 

2. He knows your strengths

He knows not only your weaknesses but also your strengths. The chance is that your childhood love knows everything about you in and out and knows what you’re capable of. He’s there to remind you and encourage you when you’re downtrodden constantly. 

Because you’ve been together for a long time, he’s seen you in many challenging situations and witnessed you harness your strength in combating particular trials. He may have even been the one to observe and help you realize them. This way, he might say, ‘Hey, but do you remember that time you did this and that? You’re incredible!’

3. Your jokes belong to you both

Your jokes belong to you both

When you’ve been with someone since you were a kid in high school, where all the practical jokes were pretty much invented, there’s not a joke, prank, or stunt that you both wouldn't be able to pull with each other. There’ll be no need to explain anything as it’ll all come naturally. 

Sometimes, you’ll find that having been your childhood sweetheart, he taught you half of the jokes you know while you were growing up and vice versa! 

4. You know each other’s friends

Being childhood sweethearts means you’ll most probably have a lot of friends in common. Seeing that the juiciest events of our lives took place in high school and college, you and your childhood love will not need to explain multiple references because you already know. 

Visits would just be reunions, and there would be fewer introductions to make!

5. There’s nothing you can’t survive together

When you date or marry the childhood sweetheart that you have known before adolescence, you’ll understand that experiencing the sudden growth of hair in weird places, the outburst of acne, voice changing, and awkward smells together can create a bond. You survived puberty and matured together in those formative years. 

You’ve experienced each other grow into what you look like today. So, if your childhood sweetheart has seen you with all the acne scars and the weight fluctuation, and he still did love you the same, you can expect that nothing of the sort can shake you as a couple in the future. Be it stretch marks from pregnancy, hormonal acne, etc.  

6. He knows your family

Many of us have so much family drama going on, and it can be challenging to share it with anyone: a close friend or a new boyfriend. However, your childhood sweetheart has been around for a long time, probably even before the drama began. As your friend and sweetheart, he has provided comfort or simply a delightful distraction. 

He understands how these issues may have affected you all these years and understands how he can help. Either by giving you some space or even doing something sentimental from when you were little that would make you smile. Another good thing is, your family also knows him too! They don’t have to pass through you to talk to him continuously. The bond has been there for the longest time. 

7. No awkward ‘meet the parents’

If you’re dating your childhood sweetheart and you’ve both decided to take the next step and get married, the pressure of him meeting your parents is out of the window! They’ve known him since he was your classmate or your high school crush. He’s visited for study groups; he took you to prom, this isn’t new. 

When it is time, you would maybe even realize that your parents had been waiting for the news. 

My family and that of my husband are intertwined. His siblings are my siblings, and mine are his. I wouldn’t have it any other way. 

8. Holding on to the past

The longer you’ve known your childhood sweetheart, the bigger the sentiments get. Now imagine the sentiments held while dating for decades. There are so many of them! As much as it’s good to hold on to memories and reminisce now and then, it’s also essential to be conscious enough not to hold on to them. 

Yes, the first kiss was surreal. And when he asked you to prom, you floated in the air. Or when he told you he loved you the first time, ugh. But marriage is not as rosy as high school, and marriage is not as glittery as when you were childhood sweethearts. It is a demanding commitment that requires hard work. 

9. Grudges and displeasures

Many childhood sweethearts and couples dating don’t talk about this, but they tend to carry baggage into their marriage. Like I said earlier, marriage isn’t easy. It’s hard, and sometimes, having known each other for as long as I have can make it harder. There have been heartbreaks along the way, but some people don’t let these feelings of hurt go. The truth is you are now adults, and it is time to let it go. 

Remember that even if he may have caused all your heartaches as a teenager (and even made you skip school because you were sad), he’s the love of your life, and that’s just how love goes. You’ve decided to be with each other and shouldn’t let incidents of the past disrupt the beautiful things waiting in the future. 

10. Forgiveness is easy

Forgiveness is easy

You’ve known your childhood sweetheart for a long time. You have also hurt each other either by words or actions. But you both have also mastered the art of forgiveness in your relationship. As a couple that’s dating or married, you know that you’re bound to cause each other pain because you’re human. It’s normal.

It’s easier with childhood sweethearts because you’ve known each other for as long as you can remember. He pushed you when you were kids and told you he was sorry. And he meant it, just like he has meant every apology after that. And of course, you trust that he always means well. 

11. You know each other well

Maybe you sat in front of your childhood sweetheart in school. Perhaps, he watched you a lot in class and always wanted to trade lunch with you. Perhaps, he always had what you needed at every turn. And soon enough, maybe you did all these for him too! You spent so many moments together and told each other everything. There’s no way that after all these years, there’s anyone that knows you better than him. 

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He knows what would upset you and what gets you giggling in a second. You know his favorite thing to wear and that he has a secret fear of big trees. I’d say it makes marriage all the more delightful. 

12. Responsibilities increase

When childhood sweethearts get married early and straight out of school, they encounter a severe shift in life. They go straight from being kids to being an adult with massive responsibilities for which they were not ready. 

If you’re in this type of situation, it’s crucial to have a conversation about balance. If only one of you is responsible, the other will feel overwhelmed, especially if you have a child. So, make sure you’re not just trying to live out a romantic movie titled ‘Childhood Sweethearts’ and remember this is real life. 

13. You get too comfortable

Some people see this as a problem, and others don’t. It is relative and subjective. Your childhood sweetheart may become very comfortable around you due to having known each other since forever. He might no longer feel the need to impress you or look attractive to you. This can or cannot affect relationships. Like I said earlier, it depends on your personality. 

Therapists and psychologists emphasize the need for mystery in a relationship, but it doesn’t have to apply to everyone. If this matters to you, discuss it in advance and discuss ways to keep your marriage spicy. Arrange date nights, quality time together, or even time apart. These could help in realizing how attracted you are to each other and rekindle that spark. 

14. Raising kids

Because you know so much about your childhood sweetheart’s upbringing, you can anticipate his opinion on how to raise your child/children and plan in advance to meet each other halfway. In a relationship, you won’t always agree on the same things. Your husband may be super strict, and you may be a yes-mom. Or, it could be the other way round. 

The good thing is that you would already know this because you know his parents and his upbringing. So, in the discussion of how you will raise your kids, there’s enough room for understanding and compromise. 

15. You don’t have to explain a lot

In being in a relationship with your childhood sweetheart, many things can go unexplained because they already know! Things like scars, tattoos, weird traits, or even addictions. There’s a high probability that he walked you to the tattoo store the day you got it or held your hand before you entered the operating room to have the surgery that gave you the scar. 

Not to say that it is best this way, but just emphasizing that childhood sweethearts have it a bit easier when it comes to spelling out stuff that isn’t very easy to describe. 

16. No case of the ex

 No case of the ex

Honestly, when I spoke to some ladies about what they love most about marrying their childhood sweetheart, this was their favorite. They don’t have to worry about an “ex” because there’s hardly any. Some say even if there is, it was probably a rebound and didn’t mean anything. 

Well, there you have it! You also don’t have to compare them to an ex because you don’t have one. So you’re not carrying drama into your marriage. The future is clear and bright!

17. You might not know who you are without them

It’s important to find who you are in its true meaning. You’ve spent a long time hanging out with your childhood sweetheart almost every day. You mean a great deal to each other, and you’ve encouraged each other through the years. You have come to realize that your minds are codependent. But you might find that without your childhood sweetheart, you don’t know who you are or what you want out of life. 

This point is quite sensitive because it gets couples thinking. And some other people don’t care because who they are with their partner is who they care to be, and that’s okay. Remember, this is a list of things to expect. You may or may not feel this way. 

18. You share a hometown

Growing up in the same neighborhood as your childhood sweetheart makes it so much easier to visit families. There’s no challenge as to whose family will be forfeited this Christmas and whose family you will miss this at thanksgiving. 

Another beautiful thing about sharing a neighborhood with your childhood sweetheart is the nostalgic atmosphere. There’s nostalgia at every turn. Things that take you down memory lane, and that’s pretty awesome if you ask me!

19. There’s always history to fall back on

Relationships can hit rough patches, and it’s good to remind yourself of why you both love each other and decided to spend all this time together. Taking yourselves to when you were childhood sweethearts can encourage and jog each other’s memory on what you love most about yourselves. 

If your partner is mad at you, you could take him out to where he first asked you to be his girlfriend or remind him of the promises you made each other years ago. 

20. Lots of reminiscing

You and your childhood sweetheart can reminisce on youthful exuberance and even act it out every once in a while. Carrying that spirit into adulthood and re-enacting it gives your relationship deeper meaning and some fire if I do say so myself. 

It has a way of bringing back the feeling of your childhood love and rebellion. Making you feel young again. It happens pretty often in my marriage and keeps us constantly hot for each other. 

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21. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger

Here, I’d just like to reiterate that being in a marriage with your childhood sweetheart is probably one of the hardest things. We as human beings are kind of bound to tire of each other. 

People think it won’t last, and sometimes, you’re kind of scared that it might not either. But when you think of how far you’ve come despite the doubts, fears, and nay-sayers, you can’t help but pick up the courage to move on and work harder. 

Most people don’t believe young, or childhood love lasts. And it in fact hardly does last. However, when people keep poking and telling you that this won’t keep on and may end, flashing through the years feels quite invigorating. 

FAQs

Should you date your childhood friend?

If you have a crush on your childhood friend and he likes you too, you should go for it! Dating your childhood friend feels good and has lots of benefits. Don’t be discouraged to date your childhood friend. 

Do first love last?

Lots of first love last, and lots of them don’t. It all depends on your individualities and circumstances surrounding the relationship. Some people believe that first love isn’t supposed to last, while some people think that your first love should be your only love. 

What does high school sweetheart mean?

Your childhood sweetheart is the boy or girl you were in love with as a teenager which quickly evolved into an adult relationship and early marriage. You are both selfless when it comes to love, and you both never questioned ending up with each other. 

Can you marry your childhood crush?

Yes, you can marry your childhood crush. A lot of women report these days that they married their first love. Family members seem to accept this, and welcome childhood crushes more.

Is it bad to fall in love with your best friend?

It’s not bad to fall in love with your best friend. However, it is essential to let your best friend know beforehand and make sure the feelings are mutual. It is also a good idea to discuss the risks of getting into a relationship with each other. 

Summary

Did you enjoy reading this list? Remember, I have listed the things to expect when you date or marry your childhood sweetheart in this article. I hope it answers your questions! I’d love to know your thoughts in the comments. If you enjoyed this article, don’t forget to like and share!

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Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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