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How To Win The Silent Treatment (7 Sure-Fire Ways)

by Sonya Schwartz

The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse and most people tend not to know this, and some men use it as a form of punishment. If you ever find yourself in such a position, this can be very bad especially since you are at the receiving end. 

In most cases, people use the silent treatment as a way to make you feel that they are more superior to you and this is because they feel weak and helpless. Some guys also use the silent treatment as a way to avoid the responsibilities of their actions, and mostly when they can't communicate the issue properly. 

But don’t get too worked up. In this article, I’ll show you how to win the silent treatment and not allow my man to have a hold on your emotion. This doesn’t mean I am in support of the silent treatment but at some point, you need to gain your self-esteem and stop your partner from using the silent treatment to abuse you. Here are 7 ways on how to win the silent treatment 

7 Ways To Win The Silent Treatment

1. Be gentle in your approach

If this is not the guy's usual attitude, starting a conversation gently is a great way to start. You do not know what he is going through and he may be battling with different situations. So make sure you gently tell him you have observed the silent treatment he gives you, and you want that to change. 

Make him understand your observations so that you both can come to a conclusion by finding a solution. Although it may not be your fault that your boyfriend is being silent, it’s important you know the cause and if the problem is from you then apologize.

If he doesn’t want to talk about it, don’t choke him by forcing the conversation. Be gentle in your approach, and give him some time alone. Most times, when your man gives you the silent treatment, it is important you give them some alone time. But don't let this linger for too long, you must talk to him as soon as you can, or talk to someone around him.

2. Let him know how you feel

let him know how you feel

Getting silent treatment is very hurtful and frustrating. It’s not a nice experience, and it can really drain your joy at that moment in time. It has even led to depression for some people. 

So, make sure you let him know how the whole situation is making you feel, you must be able to express yourself in detail, do this without leaving anything out. Tell him how draining the experience is. That way, he understands the condition he is putting you in, because of his behavior. 

Problems in relationships cannot be solved by silent treatment, and make it clear to him if you cannot tolerate such behavior in the relationship. it is important you respond to the silent treatment if your husband or boyfriend is giving you one, or you can talk to his family member about how you feel. 

So, you can get out of the situation and move on with your life. If you don't express yourself the silent treatment may lead to a broken home.

3. Acknowledge his hurt

There is a reason your partner started giving you that cold shoulder treatment. So, when he finally opens up to you, acknowledge the anger and hurt that your actions or words may have caused. And if you know you are doing something wrong or toxic, try to stop it if possible. 

Don't feel too entitled when you make a mistake; especially when you are hurting someone you love and you are the cause of the whole drama. You must be willing to apologize when you are wrong. That's the only way a relationship can work

You must also know how to deal with things in your relationship, so you can sort out things and save what you have. That’s why when your partner complains about a particular thing. Stop it if you can and if you can't talk to him and find ways to improve on yourself.

4. Suggest some ideas to him

Offer some tips that could help both of you resolve whatever issue is on the ground and solve the conflict causing the silent treatment. 

Some of the ideas you can suggest include: planning a face-to-face hangout in a conducive environment where you can talk properly. Try reconnecting with him, go to some places you had great memories together, and lay down some rules to ensure self-control, honesty, and openness.

You could even involve a third party like a counselor, therapist, or even a family member. The silent treatment is an unhealthy way to communicate emotions. So things should be improved on or changed. If they aren't then whatever you guys have might just crumble which could be very devastating.

5. Ignore for a while

ignore for a while

If you try talking to him and he doesn't respond to the silent treatment, then you should just chill for some time until he comes around. He is probably in an isolation mood and doesn’t mean any harm or maybe it is a way of keeping you under control. 

Sometimes, he just wants you to feel guilty and own up to your mistakes so you can apologize for the wrong you did. So, he is waiting for you to make the first move and bend to his demand. 

You shouldn't let anyone just push you around and think they can be the boss of your life. So you must learn to take your stand and be you. But listen, girl ignore him for a while and watch if he comes around. 

I know it’s going to be hard but try to distract yourself with other activities and do not give that satisfaction he is anticipating. Let him realize that silent treatment behavior is the wrongest way to get something from you.

6. Preserve yourself

Some men can be very manipulative and that silent treatment behavior may be his way of getting you to succumb to his request or desires against your will. And when this is the case, it 

Is already emotional abuse. He doesn’t really care about you, he is only thinking about himself at your own detriment, so that is why you should preserve yourself first and protect your mental health. 

Know your worth and do not settle for less, don’t allow yourself to be manipulated. So as a person, set boundaries in your relationship and create a personal limit to what should you tolerate so once that boundary is crossed. Make up your mind on what to do. 

If you ever notice he is trying to manipulate you, walk away immediately. You don't want to be someone like that, they can bring down your self-esteem.

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

Emotional abuse can be so subtle at the beginning so you don’t see it like what it really is, but remember that having a manipulative partner doesn’t do you any good. The constant silent treatment is one of the traits of an unhealthy partner in a relationship.

7. Be realistic

be realistic

You may feel confused as to his reasons for giving you the silent treatment and you just want it to stop. But don’t ever apologize when you’ve done nothing wrong just to put an end to the fuse. 

When someone gives you their heart they always put in the effort to make you happy and not hurt you, and if he isn't doing this then something is wrong somewhere. So, instead of begging, be real about everything.

Do not even start pleading like you are one desperate woman because that will worsen the situation and strengthen his ego. He will display that attitude more often and continue treating you like a weaker fellow.

Be realistic about the issue and face it sincerely and do not put your relationship on the edge by threatening to break up with him, when you know very well you are not ready to lose him.

But at the same time don't let him treat you like a piece of rag, you must handle this wisely.

FAQs 

Is it better to give the silent treatment?

Yes, it is. Giving your man the silent treatment can be good at times but this needs to be done cautiously to avoid issues in your relationship. While doing this, respect your boundaries, so you can win the silent treatment. 

Is the silent treatment killing your relationship? 

The silent treatment can kill your relationship greatly. You might not notice it but your relationship will begin to crumble gradually. Most times, this is because you and your partner bottle up things and can’t talk about them and this is very unhealthy for a relationship.

Is the silent treatment immature? 

Yes, giving your partner the silent treatment is very immature behavior. If you are matured you should be able to respond to the silent treatment, talk to your spouse, and trash out things every time you have issues. 

When should I use silent treatment? 

The best time to use the silent treatment is when your partner is angry, in a bad mood, or drunk, and this is also vice versa. If you are angry, it is better you give a silent treatment than arguing and giving your partner the benefit of doubt.

How do you deal with being ignored? 

You have to be calm about such a situation. You don’t want to overreact. Take out time to cool off, make sure you are not the one feeling ignored. Don’t let it get to you. Talk to your husband or boyfriend, and apologize if you need to. 

In Summary

I hope you found this article helpful. To win the silent treatment, we don’t have to be the bad guy you can be the mature one in the relationship and communicate with your partner. Be the best you can. It's better to spread love than hate. Let me know what you think, and please don't forget to share this article with others. 

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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