Are you tired of the laid-back attitude of your boyfriend when it comes to cleanliness? Do you feel disgusted when it comes to getting intimate with your partner because he smells? Believe me; I’ve been there! I was in a relationship with a man who was extremely gentle, sweet, and caring. However, his only flaw was that he had become too comfortable around me.
Within a year of our relationship, he stopped taking care of himself and skipped having showers. His body odor used to disgust me and he never cared to cut his nails. I eventually learned that the definition of hygiene for my partner was very much different from what it was for me. Therefore, I needed to look for ways to motivate him to take better care of himself.
In today’s article, we are going to look at steps that can help you to make your man take care of himself and his hygiene. These tips will help you to ensure that your boyfriend showers regularly and is always clean and tidy.
Plus, we’ll look at reasons, which might be the reason behind your boyfriend’s bad hygiene. Understanding the root cause behind his nature will help you to find a better solution to the problem.
It is sexist to believe that only men have problems taking care of their cleanliness, while women always smell fresh and clean. The truth is anyone can have poor habits and it does not depend on one's gender. The thing is we are more understanding when it is about men not following their daily routine; however, we find it difficult to digest when females have poor habits.
There can be various reasons behind a person not having proper hygiene, and these reasons range right from laziness to mental health problems. Therefore, it is important that instead of judging someone you take small efforts to motivate the person.
If a person is suffering from mental health issues, it might be difficult for him to even get up from bed, leave alone gathering the strength to take a shower. It might feel like if you are in a relationship with someone you would know if they are suffering from depression or financial issues because of which they are not able to take care of their hygiene.
However, in reality, when someone is going through these issues they try to cover the problems so well that it becomes almost impossible for others to find out anything.
Then again, some people are comfortable with themselves and do not want to change their habits even if they are for their own good. They fail to see how their habits are affecting the people who love them.
In the end, a person will change their habits only when they believe there is something wrong with them, or else they will be happy with their appearance no matter how much you try to change them.
It means you should really talk to him and not just dictate him and forcefully send him to the shower. Have a general talk and in-between, just ask him why he is not interested in maintaining his health. Remember he should not feel attacked or embarrassed and should be comfortable so he can be honest while sharing his reasons with you.
Understand that your boyfriend not taking care of his cleanliness does not necessarily mean that he is lazy as there can be various other reasons for his hygiene issues. One most common reason is depression or poor mental health.
Everybody deals with depression in their own way. While some can plaster a smile and act normally through it all, others cannot even get up from their bed or get the strength to shower or brush their teeth. So, try to understand the problem of your boyfriend and if they are indeed going through some mental trauma then take them to a counselor.
If you want to change the poor practices of your boyfriend then focus on the outcome and not on the behavior, otherwise, he will just get irritated. So instead of asking him to brush his teeth or get into the shower, point out that he has bad breath or there is a weird smell coming out from him. This might hurt him a bit, but it will still be better than the nagging behavior.
No matter what the reason behind the bad hygiene of your boyfriend, try coaxing him to follow good practices together. You do not need to make him aware of his nasty practices but just gently push him towards maintaining good personal hygiene. When he sees you taking care of yourself, there are chances that he will also be motivated to do the same.
For instance, tell him that you should both brush your teeth together. Or, maybe, coax him into taking a shower together. He can never say no to that amazing offer! You can also offer to take him shopping and buy new clothes for him. Or, you should wash your dirty clothes together.
Yes, it might sound impossible to you but there are chances that your partner might be oblivious to the fact that he has hygiene issues. In that case, you need to be honest with him and explain to him how his poor routine is affecting your relationship. Politely tell him that he needs to work on himself and change his clothes daily.
Let him know how important it is to shower daily and explain to him the problems untidy hair can cause.
Ask yourself whether your boyfriend really has a hygiene issue or you are just making a big deal about it. It might be a possibility that you are too much of a clean freak and thus, feel that your partner is not taking proper care.
Maybe you have a habit of taking a shower 3 times a day, or you brush your teeth thrice a day. Therefore, when your partner takes a shower only once a day or brushes his teeth twice a day, you feel it is inadequate.
Ok, so it seems like he is not understanding how important good hygiene is for your relationship; try a different approach. Start by explaining to him how important it is to have good personal hygiene when one goes out in public and interacts with others.
Tell him that although it might seem unfair, in reality, nobody wants to interact with someone who has a nasty smell coming out of him. Try to make him aware of the future job rejections that he might get if he does not start maintaining himself.
It might not be the best thing to have a trade-off in a relationship or emotionally blackmail your man, but sometimes it is the only way. For instance, you can tell your man that you will kiss him only after he brushes his teeth. Or, you can tempt him by saying that you will wear your sexy lingerie once he is ready to wash his daily clothes.
If it seems like your boyfriend has yellow teeth, it does not necessarily mean that he does not take care of them. There are chances that it is the natural color of his teeth. Similarly, if he does not shower enough, it may be due to some medical reasons. So, do not be quick to judge and try to find out the real reason behind his lack of personal hygiene.
If it appears that your boyfriend has bad hygiene, it does not always have to mean that he is lazy, it might mean that he is going through financial problems. Yes, not having enough money to buy a body wash or a shampoo might seem like a stretch, but then everybody has different financial conditions and different priorities.
There are chances that when it comes to making financial decisions, your man gives priority to other items than toiletries. Talk to him and if you find out that he actually is going through some financial issues then maybe try bringing some hair shampoo and new clothes occasionally.
If your boyfriend has bad hygiene and he does not seem to care then you can try to scare him by listing the health concerns that come with his poor habits. Shouting after your man to wash might seem like selfish behavior from your side to him.
However, when you explain to him how not maintaining tidiness can result in various health issues there are chances that he might listen to you. Moreover, this way, he might also be able to see your hidden love and care for him.
Pull him out of his comfort zone. There are chances that your boyfriend is too comfortable with you and is used to having bad breath and being in dirty clothes even when around you. In such a situation, you need to pull him out of his comfort zone and help him in doing things for his basic personal hygiene.
You can start by buying him new clothes and request him to try them. Even if he does not seem too interested, do not lose hope and keep requesting lovingly. There are chances that he will like the gifts that you have bought him but might not show them. Nevertheless, keep trying.
Sure, brushing twice a day and changing covers once in four days might come naturally to you, but it might not be the case with your partner. Therefore, start by reminding him when he needs to take a shower or when he needs to get into fresh clothing.
Just be patient and you will see that within a month taking care of his hygiene will become his habit and he will do it all without you having to remind him.
Make it a habit to compliment him whenever he takes care of himself. Tell him how good you feel when he takes care of himself and how it is a turn-on for you. As soon as he gets out of the shower, go closer to him and tell him, “I like it when you smell so clean”. This will surely boost his confidence.
If he feels that he is able to attract you by his clean habits then he surely will keep working on it. He will do everything in his power to make sure that he does not smell and will make it a habit to use deodorants.
Sure, it will not solve every problem but it will surely solve at least some of it. While the salon people will not give your boyfriend a bath, they will surely cut his nails and take care of his hair, thus, making him much more presentable.
There are chances that your boyfriend will love this pampering so much that he would not mind taking care of himself at home as well.
If you are thinking about taking your relationship a step further and planning to move in with him in the future then it is better that you make some points clear in advance. Talk to him about how the household work will be divided between you two and how you are planning to manage the cleaning part. Do not forget to discuss the laundry.
This will give you both an understanding of what your expectations are when it comes to hygiene.
Maintaining clean habits might come naturally to you but it might not be the case with him. He might be trying his best to match up to his standard but you need to understand it takes time. So, instead of criticizing him and taking out frustration on him, try to encourage and motivate. Do not compare him with his friends and keep pushing him slowly.
Even when you are not nagging and focusing on the outcome rather than the action, it is important that you do not come out as rude. This is a sensitive topic and has the potential to break your relationship so you need to proceed with precaution. Whatever you want to say about your partner’s bad habits, say it in a joking way so they are not offended.
No matter how ridiculous it may sound yet it might be the reason behind your partner not taking care of his hygiene. So instead of showing shock on your face when you give this reason, try to help them in making a timetable in which you allocate time for each daily activity.
Help them understand that brushing and showering are activities that do not take more than half an hour. Help them with making out where they can take out time for these activities from their daily routine. Also do not be too harsh on him if he wants to skip a shower once in a few months.
There are chances that your boyfriend did not have a normal childhood where he was taught about basic hygiene habits. Maybe his friends are the same, therefore, he never feels a need to change. In this situation, you can try to teach him everything from the start. Teach him how to wash and when to change his clothes.
If even after trying all the methods nothing works and you still find yourself wondering why my boyfriend has bad hygiene then probably it is time to take some action. If your man is not willing to even take care of himself then you need to think about what he can do for your relationship.
This might seem like a small problem on the surface but imagine living with someone who continuously grosses you out. Unfortunately, if he is not even willing to change and does not even see anything wrong with his habits then you have no other option than to break up with him.
It can be very tricky if your boyfriend has bad hygiene, especially if it is the only negative trait that he has. In such a situation, you can follow the steps given above and support your partner in changing his habits. It may need some patience, but in the long run, it will all be worth it.
Body odor, unkempt clothes, dirty nails, bad breath, etc. are some signs of bad hygiene. A person having all these signs can never put a good impression on the people he meets and it can get difficult for him to make friends. Laziness, depression, financial problems, obliviousness can be some reasons behind the lack of good hygiene in someone.
Yes, bad hygiene is a deal-breaker. It can be a huge turn-off for many people if their prospective partner is not hygienic enough. Usually, people having body odor or bad breath are excluded from the group, which decreases their confidence and makes them feel unattractive.
To help someone with bad hygiene you need to first try to find out the root cause of their problem. You need to be patient and understanding while dealing with this kind of person and slowly try to push them towards better practices. You need to be honest with them and let them know where the problem is and how they can improve.
There can be several reasons for it. There is a possibility that he has become so comfortable in his present state that he does not want to change, or he might be too lazy to get out of his bed to do his morning regime. There are also chances that he might be suffering from depression and might find it difficult to take care of himself.
Have you ever been with a man who simply refused to take care of himself? Do you have any tips that you used, which you want to share with our readers? What was your experience like? Did he change? We would love to hear a word from you to help our readers with their relationships. Please comment below!