As women, we can sometimes be mean. However, it's not cool to be mean, whether in your relationship or with platonic friends, and I mean that 100%. But let's face it, we've all been a jerk at one time or another. Sometimes, it's a counter-reaction to the other person's mean behavior or insensitive comment, so we go ahead and be mean right back because we are not taking it.
For example, your man did a huge number on you, like sleep with your best friend, or perhaps something worse. Then yes, it might be okay to be a little mean for a couple of seconds. Most times, we don't even realize we are dropping those damaging phrases. That's because we let our emotions get in the way.
When it comes to your husband or boyfriend, there are just some things you don't want to say if you still want that relationship to remain alive. With that said, here are many examples of mean things to say to your man or shouldn't say. It'll be great to know them so that you can altogether avoid unintentionally hurting your man and relationship.
Okay, there's no subtle way to put this one; it's overly blunt and insensitive. You might have said it because it's genuinely not a good time to discuss the issue. But what it sounds like is, "I don't care about whatever you have to say."
This statement might seem harmless if you are addressing a constantly nagging boyfriend. But it's also a way of throwing someone's opinion or complaint in the trash like they don't have a say.
Unless your man is trying to conjure some ridiculous explanation as to why he had sex with your best friend, shut up is a mean and straightforward way of saying, "your feeling and opinions don't matter." We all deserve some respect from our partners.
Your boyfriend is not your child, so there's no point trying to make him feel like he's a toddler just because you want him to do something your way. When you say that in a conversation, that's a message that he's a far cry from what you expect from a man.
Perhaps, this one came out of your mouth because you expect more from your husband or boyfriend. Trust me, it's a punch at your man's ego, unsupportive, and altogether insensitive. If he's doing his best, this type of comment will pull him down and push him away.
The truth is you just want more help. So, why don't you just lovingly ask him? If you take a second assessment before dropping that selfish comment, you'll realize you aren't the only one doing everything in your home. It just looks like that because of the angle you see it from.
Even if you've made the decision to call the relationship quits, this is no phrase you want to throw at a guy you are dating. High and low periods are common to all humans, so there's no point pulling someone down with mean words, especially when they're trying their best.
It's not uncommon for women to feel we are better than men at most domestic chores. If you have a guy that helps around the house, try not to be a know-it-all by always making his effort or style look wrong just because it's not your way of doing things.
This comment is another punch at the ego. Research shows that men like to be the hero in their relationship. Reminding him of his past failed effort is a slap at his mental capabilities, which will make him feel incapacitated around you.
Perhaps you've got a clumsy guy for a boyfriend or husband; still, blaming him all the time for every happening in your relationship is not the best way to go.
Sometimes a man might need a reality check if he's acting all irresponsible, like lying around playing video games all day. But if he's trying his best, it's meant to add undue pressure by making emasculating statements.
So, you are the breadwinner of the home, but it feels like your partner hasn't quite gotten his rhythm with his sales and commission job. Throwing it at his face all the time can be damaging to both his success and feelings.
Support is what everyone needs, not insults. You don't want to pull your friends down, let alone someone you are romantically involved with.
This short sentence can come up once or twice because you are highly upset. If it's frequent, you are sending a wrong message into the heart of the receiver.
Some couples joke with this line a lot, but for the most part, it's not a nice thing to say. Making your partner feel they are not good enough for you or that you could do better than them. Guys don't like to feel like they are beneath their girl.
This one is how condescending people manage to say they are sorry. Apologizing helps to bring both parties on the same page. There's no point adding a fault to it just to make your man look bad or feel guilty.
It's not a good idea to invalidate the feelings of others. Because it's not a big deal to you doesn't mean it's no big deal to your man.
There are tons of ways to tell a guy he might need to hit the gym. Body shaming isn't one of them. You might think you're being honest, but it's mean coming from you that's the closest person to him.
While this comment may come in like a joke, it also has a manipulative tune in it. You man has a working mind. You didn't make him like software. Even if your presence somehow contributed to his current great status. It's not a nice thing to say.
The relationship between your boyfriend and his mom may not be the best. He may even complain and say some weird things to you. But don't you dare throw insults at his mom, thinking he'll be cool with it.
This is one territory you might want to tread softly, especially when you don't have a joint account or he earns way more than you do. They are his family. It's meant to make them look like they are disturbing nobodies.
Again, relationships are complex, and it's possible you man isn't totally psyched about his mom, dad, or entire folks. But that doesn't give you the freedom to bad-mouth his family. He might play it cool with you at first but may open a can of worms about it later.
Sex is one major department guys don't like to feel inadequate. There are millions of ways to tell a guy the sex wasn't all that great. Asking if it's in when you know it's already in is a mean punch below the belt.
Okay, so you were expecting more, but the whole bedroom parade ended after two minutes. You can always tell him you want more instead of asking if that's all he's got. Girl, that's mean.
Oh no! You don't want to go there. Research shows that men feel insecure about their penis size. So, if the sex isn't lousy, there's no point in making a comparison about the size. You can let the comparison stay in your head.
Well, you are just looking out for him, right? Here's the thing, men don't relate nicely with anything that makes them feel inadequate down there.
Okay, there were no fireworks in the first few parades. Still, you don't have to "hit him below the belt." He won't get over it in a hurry.
Okay, he could be tired or not very strong. Pulling out an "alternative" without caring to know what's up with him is another "punch" where men don't like it.
There could be times you are not feeling the vibe. But telling him to stop and switch to touching himself is like the worst thing ever you can say to a guy.
Oh no. Tell me you didn't say this one in the middle of sex. You not only succeeded in making him feel inadequate, but you may also have permanently killed his pride.
What are you trying to do, start world war three? This one is mean on levels. Tell your man how you need him to be. It's best to do away with comparisons.
Shots fired, man down. Now, I know some phrases might sound harmless to you, but when you are trying to make your man do something for you in a way, don't make it about your ex.
There's a reason or reasons why you are not with your ex anymore. Using almost every opportunity to make your partner feel like he has to compete to please you is terrible.
It's not wrong to want some normal dating activities. But it's downright mean to bring your ex you're suggesting it to your man. That's like making him feel he doesn't have the initiative like your ex.
Whether it's in a good or bad way, your current partner doesn't want to feel like he's walking in the shadow of your past lover. It's neither fair nor healthy for your relationship.
Your past lover isn't psychic, and your current boyfriend can't be too, so quit throwing your ex's prowess on your boyfriend's face, it's not pretty.
Okay, you know what? Just leave your ex out of it. You might be a brutally honest person, but statements like these are too mean to say to your guy. It's best not to talk when you are angry.
You might think this comment shouldn't be harmless, but men don't like to hear that they are short even when they are short. It's a bit similar to the "punch" below the belt.
Yeah, the beard gang thing is trending, and you want your guy to flow with the trend. But this comment might make him feel like you don't like his look. Even worse, you find other men attractive.
Yeah, he knows, and it's genetics, so don't rub it on his face all the time. Trust me; you are the last person he wants to hear it from that he's losing his hair and perhaps becoming less attractive.
Now, it doesn't sound like you wish your man is rich. It sounds like you are telling him you desire someone else. It's not only mean and disrespectful, it's got a good-digging ring to it.
Maybe you should let this one stay in your imagination. While your man might react badly, you may trigger a jealousy vibe.
These kinds of phrases never end well. It's mean, and it equates to shaming a man by making him feel less than what he naturally is.
Both parties in a relationship may say mean things to each other when they fight. But, telling someone you regret meeting them is a whole new level of being a jerk.
The entitlement mentality isn't attractive at all. Telling your man he has to take care of you but you don't have to do anything for him in return is just mean and selfish.
It probably can't get meaner. You might think you are being yourself when you use these lines, but this is something people do when they don't want to reach a compromise. Whether it's with your friends or boyfriend, it's a mean way of telling them they should accept your bad attitude the way you are because you will never change.
One of the negative things you could say to a person that may affect them even after you call it quits is telling them they are not attractive anymore. A low self-esteemed guy might always look at himself in the mirror and never feel unlovable for anyone.
This statement shouldn't go out from you to someone you are dating. You can help them get better at looking good instead of rubbing it in their face that they don't dress well.
If it has gotten to the stage where your man irritates you, the door is wide open. It's mean to react to his action with such an insensitive and condescending comment.
As a woman, it's hard when you man cheats. Even more, with someone you never in your wildest dreams thought he could have sex with. This could make you feel disgusted to say such words. Altogether, it's mean.
When you do this to a guy, you'll no doubt strike a nerve. If you are dating him, I bet it'll take many apologies to get him on the same page with you. If he's just a friend, he'll probably start ghosting you.
Unless your husband left your toddler in a fridge or home alone without supervision, you should let emotions drive you to the extent of saying he's dumb. That's not only a slap on his intellect, it's also a sign of being domineering.
When this phrase shows up in conversation, it's usually in order to get back at your boyfriend for upsetting you. Altogether, it's a sensitive comment that you don't want to use frequently. It could make your partner feel less loved.
There's almost nothing more hurtful than when the person you love the most doesn’t believe what you say.
It's one thing if he's giving you strong reasons to suspect he's cheating, but when you just throw it at him that you don't trust him for no reason, now that's heart-wrenching.
It's possible your man heated in the past. If you forgive and continue, then give him a chance to earn your trust. Frequently throwing this type of statement at him will break his heart and make it difficult for you guys to get better.
Cheating is already a wrong move. Now, making your man feel terrible for your bad action, that's an advanced level of being mean.
Whether your boyfriend never met your relationship expectations from the start of your goals changed, it's mean and insensitive not to give some encouragement, especially when he's trying his best.
Did you ever start the relationship with a "manage memo?" Why would you want to tell your man you can't manage him any further. It's supposed to be a loving relationship, not an agent-footballer arrangement.
There are millions of ways to encourage your man to do his own thing and not be all over you every time. A needy person already has some self-esteem issues. Running it in their face will only further hurt them.
You may swing this one under being upset or angry when you said it, but trust me, your husband won't forget this soul-crushing comment in a hurry.
Whether or not someone gave you a hint that your man is no good before you married him, it's a horrible thing to say to him because you had an argument. This one will leave him wondering for a long time how many people have a flawed notion about him.
Couples can have an argument or a fight in relationships; there no doubt about it. However, when you go for the "jugular" just because you want to get back at him, that's pretty mean and low.
Well, he's not going to flush them down the drain. Children are amazing. But if it's too much baggage for you to live with another woman's children, there are millions of ways to pass that feeling across to a guy you are dating.
Perhaps you don't want to date a guy, it's okay to simply let him know. Rejecting him by making it about his financial position is not only rude, but it also puts you in a bad place.
Again, belittling a guy because you don't want to go out with him is mean. Even if you are a celebrity or privileged, it's low to rub your social status on someone's face.
Ouch! This one will hurt any guy like a knife, especially if he's into you. It might mean nothing to you as you may only be saying the qualities you want in your kind of man. However, it's a classic "I cannot date you" move.
"Someone like him," that sounds like there is something wrong with him, making him "undateable." Rejection is altogether hard to accept sometimes. Now, adding a mean comment tour makes it even harder to swallow.
Some relationships may not last forever, even after you promise each other the "till death do us part" love." In whatever way you have been a positive contribution to your partner's life, you don't have to be mean when displaying a God complex. Saying they won't amount to anything without you is unnecessary.
Failure isn't specific to a person, and anyone can fail. In fact, the most successful people in the world had experienced failures before they got their big breaks. Support is what your man needs.
Insults are forms of emotional violence. Girl, you don't want to be a torment to your man's emotion. It's not only disrespectful saying he's an idiot, it's showing you are toxic.
Divorce doesn't have to be messy. If the relationship isn't working, it might be best for both parties to leave peacefully.
Because women usually have the upper hand in many divorce scenarios doesn't mean you have to threaten him emotionally. You both have equal rights to your kids.
Again, it's not uncommon for many divorce cases to favor women. Continually making a man feel he has to put up with your excesses because of the fear of losing more than half of what he owns is just plain wicked.
One of my friend's husbands cheated on him. Girl, she was so mad he made him feel their four daughters weren't his. He had to go through the hassle of confirming there was no paternity fraud for real before divorcing him.
An argument between couples isn't necessarily about who's correct or wrong. It's simply about sharing feelings in order to make up and get better. Saying your partner is wrong for being angry is technically saying they don't have a right to have feelings.
While it's okay to stand your ground when your partner is forceful, hearing these words frequently could also mean you don't want to be a team player. Couples are meant to be a team.
Yeah, it looks like your partner is performing below your expectations. But using these words means you can't see any good about his presence in the relationship.
There's almost no other statement that could sting the heart sharper than "I don't love you anymore." When you drop it this way, it looks like there are no doubts any more—no longer room for trial or couples counseling.
Try not to be too blunt, thinking you are telling your man what you need. You can do so without making your past love look like a superman.
One of the most unfair ways to treat your partner is by bringing a third party to your relationship. You'll not only judge him with an impaired view; you'll end up hurting and pushing him away.
There is no sugar-coating this one. It's got threats written all over it. You even sound like you are putting your partner under unnecessary pressure to please you.
This statement is very hurtful. It's a cruel way of saying you are not sorry you hurt your significant other, and they just have to forget about it.
Quite similar to the above. It's a phrase from a narcissist playbook. A direct and cold way of saying, "I'm not going to apologize, so what are you going to do about it?"
When the words come out this way, your partner may translate it as you want out, while you may just mean you need some time to process issues.
It's very mean to make your partner feel like he's a reminder of your past painful experience. He might not be doing it intentionally, so cut him some slacks.
If you are trying to get back at your partner with this statement, girl, it's more likely he's reading it as you don't want to be with him anymore.
These words are a complete dent to a guy's personality, capacity, and self-esteem. You are not only saying"I don't want you anymore," but also "nobody will want you."
Saying you are tired is one thing, but "that's not my job" is saying I'm not going to be helpful, so deal with it.
Again, this statement is an indirect way of saying you don't want to contribute your quota. You don't have the strength for that, but you are probably open to doing something else.
It's the 21st century. Both men and women are now pulling resources and money together to make marriages work. This type of response in a conversation is sending a sign that you don't care.
Again, men don't like being inadequate. This statement is a huge slap on his ego and intellect. Of course, he'll feel hurt.
Does it sound like a compliment? No, it's not. The blast from the past makes it look like your telling him he's now a shadow of himself. Trust me; he won't find it funny.
You are both investing in the relationship. Making it look like it's only his responsibility, and he failed to keep the spark between you both alive is irrational and mean.
If your partner's friends aren't deliberately making you uncomfortable, these words are uncalled for. You don't have to like them, but you don't have to hate them and tell him about it.
Okay, so you earn more than your partner. Big deal, that doesn't mean you have to emasculate him.
Okay, so this one is bad. No matter what he did, girl, you shouldn't make him feel he doesn't have the right to live. What's more, the comment subtly brings his parents into it.
It's best not to let emotions take you over to say things that could even get you into trouble. If he truly drops dead, you could be a suspect.
When a person is sick, it usually makes others pity them. Saying you wish them dead on their sickbed is not just the highest level of being mean; it shows you are vindictive and, altogether, a cruel person.
This statement is more like writing off a person. Not seeing any advantage of discussing a matter with a guy means he's completely insignificant.
Relationships go south even after them for "better or worse" promise. Breaking it off shouldn't be an opportunity to exchange toxic words. Making someone feel they are a hindrance to your potential isn't a nice thing to say.
Words that make guys feel inadequate are the worst. E.g., you can't amount to anything; you can't even make me orgasm, be a man for once.
Words that hit guys "below the belt" are often hard to forget. Because guys always like to be heroes, statements that make him feel less than a hero are what they never want to hear.
I don't love you.
I can count on you.
You don't excite me anymore
I only have sex with you as a duty.
Apart from food, sex, men have the innate desire to be saviors of women. Even if a woman can handle something on her man, a man still wants to play Prince Charming and swoop in to save the day.
For starters, dress the part. Something sexy but not trashy. Give him a flash of you, i.e., make him work for while you make yourself available only occasionally. Also, be kind to his friends.
More than half the time, we say mean things when we are upset, especially when we want to get back at someone we love or used to love us. While it sometimes feels justifiable to be mean to others that were equally mean to us, it's best to avoid saying what you'll later regret.
Instead, say something nice or nothing at all.
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