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How to Make Your Ex Jealous (35 Tips to Make Him Want You Back)

Last updated on November 17, 2022 by Kelsey Willows

If you regret breaking up with your boyfriend and you’re trying to get him back, there are many ways to make your ex jealous.

But firstly… Do you actually want him back? 

This isn’t just about playing games. If you spend too much time focusing on an ex that you don’t even want, you’re stopping yourself from being able to develop new relationships.

It’s important to take time for yourself after a break up. Reflect on what happened, and what you need to do to make things work in the future; not necessarily with him but in general. Was he the problem? Or did you both have things to work on? 

You may have broken up due to something beyond both of your control, or it may have been something much worse than that. Allow time to pass, and consider if the two of you could actually make it work again. 

If so, remember to avoid any negativity or toxicity. Making him a little jealous is harmless when trying to get his attention, but also have you considered honesty

It may feel a little awkward depending on how much time has passed, but this is something that can be achieved with an honest and open conversation about the potential of your future together. 

If not, the golden rule is to always remember to respect his boundaries and wishes, as you would want him to respect yours. If he has asked for space, give it to him. Consider if you’re doing the right thing. 

Creating jealousy can be healthy, as long as it is understood:

David M. Buss, author of “The Dangerous Passion: Why Jealousy Is as Necessary as Love and Sex” explains that there are both destructive and triumphant sides to human desire, and in turn jealousy.

He explores that where women tend to be more jealous surrounding emotional infidelity, “the majority of men, however, find the prospect of a partner’s sexual infidelity more agonizing.” This is because “sex differences in jealousy lie deep in the evolutionary past of the human species”.

He goes on to explain, “jealousy… is not a sign of immaturity, but rather a supremely important passion that helped our ancestors, and most likely continues to help us today.”

Healthy jealousy can trigger emotions, and help us to understand our hearts a little better. Regardless of any tips that I may have to offer, you yourself understand your previous relationship and your partner and only you will know the specific way to go about trying to get him back.

Most importantly, remember not to hurt yourself along the way. I believe that the most successful relationships come from being able to cope without the other but choosing to stay together because you bring out the best in each other. 

If you feel like you can’t live without him, and you’re obsessed with the need to get him back, then take more time to yourself first, as you’re most likely not ready to re-enter this relationship with any hope of success for a happy future together. 

Contents

How to Make Your Ex Jealous on Social Media

If you’re committed to the idea of trying to get him back, social media is a great place to start to make your ex feel jealous, especially if you’re not necessarily in contact with one another. 

Not only to get the attention of your ex-boyfriend, but being more active on social media is a great way to show everyone this new person that you’ve become as a result of your glow up, keeping your options open and helping you enter the dating market; it’s a positive in any potential outcome.

1. Be active on social media

The ultimate way to achieve making him jealous, is by making sure that you’re all over his home page. Show him that you’re happy, you’re looking your best and that you’re okay! This is the most obvious way to get his attention.

2. Flirt with others on social media

Dating apps are great for getting yourself out there, but not when you’re trying to show your ex that you’ve ‘moved on’. If you want to show him that you’re in the dating market, comment on other men’s posts being flirty (but never desperate). 

This is also great for your self-esteem; it feels nice to flirt and to be wanted, it’s just a little bonus if it can create jealousy of an ex too. 

3. Show your glow up

show your glow up

Show not only your ex but everyone that you’re doing great after the break up. There’s nothing sexier than confidence, so flaunt yourself looking your best! 

If you’re in good shape, flaunt it, if you’re feeling happier, show it! If you’re feeling successful in your career, celebrate it on social media. It’s the best way to show that you’re in a good place.

4. Things to post to make your ex jealous

Making your ex jealous isn’t just about showing him that you’re dating, it’s about showing him that you’re doing fine without him. 

This doesn’t mean to say that you don’t want him back, but simply that you’re thriving on your own. This will then show him that you’re in a place where you could potentially work together again. 

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him.

Take this quick quiz to see if he actually likes you!

If you’re posting pictures out with mutual friends, or even with a new guy, or posting statuses to show that you’re simply having fun, he may feel jealous that you’re doing okay without him, but also it might make him feel happy for you, and want to get back in touch. 

5. How to make your ex jealous on Snapchat

Snapchat is a popular platform for showing thereal you. Another app that’s great for this is BeReal, a new(ish) app that encourages you to post whatever it is you’re doing at the time you receive a notification. 

Apps like these may be more beneficial to use when making your ex jealous as they encourage you to post normality, not fabricated or exaggerated posts on Instagram with the goal of getting likes.

This will make him see that you are genuinely doing okay and having fun, rather than posts on other platforms that can feel staged or scripted sometimes. It will show him some genuinity of you living your best life. 

6. Snaps to make your ex jealous

When using Snapchat, you can create a private story that you would tend to have your closest friends or family on, add him to it and post regular updates about what you’re up to; almost like a lowkey vlog. 

This can make him jealous or envious that this is something that he’s no longer involved in, and make him question wanting to be back in your life. 

7. How to make your ex jealous on Facebook

Facebook is often used for sharing posts or updating statuses. Of course you can post pictures too but this is something that tends to be done more on Instagram. 

Share posts surrounding positivity and well-being, but most importantly, make sure that you believe them. Again, the only chance of making it work with your ex is to show him that you’ve genuinely worked on yourself. 

8. Statuses to make your ex jealous

A status that makes your ex jealous could be you updating your friends on Facebook of how busy you are. If you go out with a friend, or go on a date, post a status, tag whoever you're with and even include the location. 

The more detail, the better to make your ex jealous. Show him if you’re making new friends or if you have a new love interest.

9. How to make your ex jealous on Instagram

Instagram is perfect to dramatize your outings. Take aesthetic pictures, look your best and choose your captions wisely. Flaunt your holidays, or your fantastic new job! Post selfies and make him wonder why you guys ever broke up in the first place. Or better yet, post pictures of things that you used to enjoy together, a certain restaurant, for example.

Another good tip is to post stories with your song playing in the background. You can now add lyrics to a story on Instagram, which can make your song choice even more prominent when getting his attention.

10. Instagram captions to make your ex jealous

Instagram captions can get his attention if done correctly, and you can aim them directly at him. In your captions, show him that you’re doing great, talk discreetly about your break up/glow up, or use an emoji that you might have often sent to each other in private.

11. Tweets to make your ex jealous

Twitter is a platform where you can overshare, and make light hearted jokes about your breakup. 

Twitter is also great for flirting! Reply to other men’s tweets, ask questions on your own Twitter encouraging others to reply to you.

12. Quotes to make your ex jealous

Sharing quotes about positivity, or moving on after a break up are a great way to get his attention. Firstly, to show him that you’re okay, but secondly to show him that you’re being mature about the break up.

You don’t have to shy away from the fact that you guys broke up, lots of people go through break ups and it’s entirely normal to share parts of your break up on social media; not just to gain attention, but to show honesty and to help others. 

It can be a really prominent thing in your life and sharing your journey may help you with the process, whether you get back together or not. It can also make him realize that you’re both at a stage where you can give things another try.

13. Pictures to make your ex jealous

pictures to make your ex jealous

Pictures with the opposite sex are usually effective. Nobody wants to see their ex girlfriend with another man. However, if you’re wanting to get back together, I would suggest that the best pictures to make him jealous will be pictures that show how happy you are! 

14. Memes to make your ex jealous

Being active on social media will most definitely result in sharing memes or tagging friends in memes; choose them wisely! Try and think of memes that would make him laugh, or memes that show your glow up post break up. He will most likely see all of them.

15. Look your best

Looking your best will boost your confidence, but also remind him of what he’s missing, this is the best way to get his attention! Remind him why he ever fancied you in the first place.

16. Post pictures of when you were together

This one can be tricky, as you don’t want your news feed to be full of your ex… But, consider posting pictures of when you were together, where he simply isn’t in the photograph. 

For example, a picture he’s taken of you. When writing your caption, include something about how happy these memories are, and remind him of what you had together.

17. Post pictures of dates that used to be ‘your thing’

Again, be careful to avoid toxicity, but try and replicate some of the date nights that you and your ex had been on and post pictures. 

This one might hurt him, which is why I urge you to tread carefully. It can be upsetting to be reminded of what you’ve lost by seeing them do that very same thing with someone else, but it can be very effective when trying to get his attention. 

18. Stop or reduce contact

If you’re still in contact with your ex but it’s not looking likely that you’re going to get back together anytime soon, then I would suggest to follow the no contact rule, but don’t block him. 

You’ll want him to see you moving on with your life, and of course I’m sure you’ll want to see what he’s up to as well, but by reducing contact you’re allowing each other time to work on your issues. Only then will you have a good chance of making things work again. Allow time to miss one another, and be honest and open about what you wish to get out of this space from one another.

19. Continue to like his posts

Each time he sees your name on his phone, it will be a little reminder of your relationship and what you had together. Don’t allow him to completely lose interest. 

20. Show him that you’re in the dating market

It’s all well and good posting pictures with your guy friends, but try to show him that you’re actively dating.

That’s not to say that you should go on hundreds of dates and rub it in his face, but subtly show him that you’re having fun and are ready to enter a new relationship (or an old one, wink wink!)

21. Increase your friends/followers on social media

Being active on social media is great, but expanding on friends and followers is a perfect way to show him that you’re putting yourself out there, meeting new people and having fun!

22. Go on vacation and flaunt it

We tend to go on vacation with our partners, so if he sees that you’re living it up in Italy without him, he’s bound to be jealous! 

Also, a getaway is a perfect chance to reset, which may well be just what you need to show him that you can make things work. 

23. Post good news

If you’re not in contact with one another, posting good news is a perfect way to allow him to celebrate with you. He may feel extra jealous that good things have happened to you after the break up.

How to Make Your Ex Jealous Over Text

If you are actually in contact with your ex, then you may have to do a little more than simply trying to get his attention. 

Remember, my number one advice is always to be honest. Open up a conversation about the potential of your future together and where you stand with one another, it might save a lot of time! 

Think about why you’re actually in contact. Has he made it clear that you’re just a friend, or is he simply not ready to let you go yet.

Of course, if you’re not in a position where you’re confident enough to open the conversation, then there are several tips that can help when making your ex jealous over text. 

1. Avoid any arguments or negativity

If you’re still in a position where you’re arguing, then consider that maybe it’s for the best that you broke up, or revert to the no contact rule whilst you both work on any issues.

2. Don’t be too eager or keen

If you’re trying to get him back, but you’re not sure about his outlook on your relationship, then avoid being too eager for his affection.

3. Be honest about your dating life

be honest about your dating life

If you’re dating other people, be honest with him and tell him. If you have a new guy friend, be open about that too. 

This is an effective way to make him feel bad about losing you, because he can see that you’re moving on but that you’re mature enough to be honest about it. 

4. Continue to be open about sex with him

If you’re still in contact with your ex, you’re probably lucky enough that you’ve not gone through that awkward phase where you can’t talk about sex or masturbation any longer. 

I suggest that to keep the spark alive, flirt with him, and be open about your physical needs! This may even result in the two of you sleeping together. 

As long as you’re not exclusively sleeping together without any hope of getting back together, then I see no harm in flirting. I mean, we all have needs! 

5. Send him a nude by ‘mistake’

Again, tread carefully with this, because you don’t want to send mixed signals. But, if you can successfully send a nude, and make him believe that it was meant for another man, that’s bound to make him crazy. 

Just remember that there is a time and a place, and you don’t want him to lose interest.

Also, if the time is right… then no need to act like it’s a mistake. If he’s flirting with you, then by all means send him a spicy photo! Keep the spark alive. 

6. Remind him of the best bits of your relationship

Taking a trip down memory lane is perfect when talking to an ex. Remind him of how things used to be good, and make him wonder if it could ever go back to those times that were bliss. 

7. Be unavailable

Don’t reply to him too often. You don’t want to seem obvious, and you want to make him crazy whilst waiting for you to reply! This will also help you to stop obsessing over waiting for him to reply in return. Healthy boundaries are most definitely needed.

8. Ask about his friends and family

Make it clear to him that you wish to be kept in the loop, and that you care about his friends and family.

9. Be mysterious

You don’t want him to think he has you wrapped around his finger. Be mysterious! He may find it sexy. 

10. Show him that you’ve worked on your issues

And advise him to work on his! If you wish to have any chance of getting back together, you have to show that you’ve both changed in order to make it work. Be open about your journey after the break up, and show each other that you’ve worked on yourselves.

11. Reverse psychology

If you don’t think you’re getting anywhere by acting normally with him, then you can always try reverse psychology; try and make him think that you don’t want to get back together. This may just spur him on! However, I must urge you to tread carefully with this tip as you wouldn’t want it to backfire. 

12. Tell him that you want to get back together

As much as many of these tips may help you, nothing will help you more than to tell him that you want to get back together with him. Of course, choose your time wisely, but ultimately the best way to show him that you want to try and make things work is by telling him.

FAQs

What are the signs of a jealous ex?

You can usually tell if your ex is jealous as they will actively try to keep in the loop of what you’re doing. They also may try and respond by trying to make you feel jealous in return. Or, they will simply tell you how they’re feeling.

Does my ex miss me even though we don't talk?

I think it’s safe to assume yes. Of course, there’s no way of guaranteeing how your ex now feels about you. But in some way or another, we all tend to go through phases of missing our exes. They once played such a big part of your life! It would be impossible to go on without ever thinking of them again, of course, unless it ended badly.

How do I get my ex to text me first?

Social media is a great way of getting him to text you first. If you’re active on social media, he’ll be constantly reminded of you, and most likely want to catch up with you. However, there is no harm whatsoever in texting him first. Sometimes, we need to take the plunge ourselves!

How do you make your ex miss you without talking to him?

Remind him of how you used to be so good together. This can be done without talking to him, by posting happy memories of your relationship (subtly), and reminding him of why he fell in love with you in the first place. For example, if he loved a certain picture of you, post it and caption it remarking on how happy you were at this time in your life.

Conclusion

Jealousy is a necessary emotion when making a relationship work. It helps us to understand our feelings a little better, and may trigger something major, for example, getting back together with an ex (see what I did there?) 

However, you don’t want to induce too much jealousy that will result in toxic behaviors or emotions to one another. You have to consider why you broke up in the first place, and the reality of how you’re going to make it work together again. 

You also have to remember that if you’re successful, and you do end up back in a relationship, this ‘new’ relationship will be built on the foundation of everything that you did in order to make him jealous in the first place. 

So, remember to be subtle, stay true to yourself, and if all else fails, honesty is the best way to go! 

Feel free to comment any extra tips that you may have, and as always, share them with a friend in need!

Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. You have to understand how he is wired. Once you do, you'll find there is a subtle thing you can say that to him that will drastically change how he shows his emotions towards you.

Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not!

Kelsey Willows
As a woman in our world, I’ve dreamed of becoming a writer to essentially help women! I think it’s important to normalize topics that are considered taboo, especially within relationships and sex! I have always been a shoulder to cry on, whether that’s to a close friend or even to a woman scorned in the bathroom of a nightclub! I give balanced advice, and encourage those to look at a situation from several points of view. I recently graduated from Salford University in England where I wrote my final dissertation on gender representations in adaptations of pride and prejudice for film and TV, and alongside this have been writing a novel. Again, normalizing the want for pleasure as a woman, and the need of a healthy relationship.

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