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How To Know If You Can Trust A Guy (23 Tell-Tale Signs)

by Sonya Schwartz

Trust is a vital component in our social lives, and no healthy relationship can function without both parties sharing a mutual trust for each other. A typical trait that many toxic relationships have in common is a lack of trust by one party. According to this article by The Washington Post, our relationships are just as important as our diets. 

Therefore, when we remain in toxic relationships, we are putting our health at just as much risk as not exercising or eating healthy. 

I understand that some of us may have been scorned in love, and as such, we find it difficult to trust people. It seems like there is always a bomb in your mind waiting to explode whenever you meet someone new. So, you pick and dissect their words, doubt their intentions, or worse, stalk them to know what they are hiding. 

Being in a relationship with someone who does not trust you is no fun, and your boyfriend might be feeling drained because of your lack of trust. In this article, I will provide you with 23 signs that you can trust a guy. These signs will help you narrow down your thoughts and determine if your guy is trustworthy or not.

23 Signs To Know If You Can Trust A Guy

1. He trusts you

Psychologists believe that sometimes, we tend to project our beliefs and behaviors. Therefore, untrustworthy people will want to project their thought patterns on you. When they make false accusations, it is not always because they have given you a reason to doubt but because they are capable of such behavior.

When a guy can trust you wholly, it means that he is honest in his dealings and expects you to be honest. It is on this premise that he does not see the need to question your actions or inactions. 

2. He picks his calls in your presence

Turning down his phone’s screen, rejecting incoming calls, or walking out of you to answer a call are all red flags that point to only one thing — a guy who is not trustworthy. When a man behaves this way, he is hiding something from you and will rather refuse to pick a call than answer it in your presence.

One of the signs that you can trust a guy is when he answers his calls in your presence. He knows that there is nothing wrong with what he is doing, and it will not upset you if you know the person on the other line. 

3. He indulges your family and friends

He indulges your family and friends

Does your man put up a protest every time you invite him for family gatherings or events where he will meet your close friends? While this can mean that he experiences social anxiety, it could also mean that he is refusing to meet them because he is scared they might see through him.

Friends and family play a vital role when it comes to our relationships. Often, they are the first to know when a person is not suitable for us, and that’s because they can view things objectively without emotions clouding their judgment. 

Therefore, when a man does not mind you spending an extended amount of time with your friends and family, it can be a sign that he is a guy you can trust.

4. He shows you off on social media

Social media is now an integral part of our lives as humans in the 21st century. We use it as windows into what’s happening in our lives. Therefore, people use it to showcase to the world the things that matter most in their lives. 

So when a guy shows you off on social media, it serves two purposes. First, it means that he appreciates you, and secondly, it means that he is proud to be your boyfriend, and he wants the world to know that you are together. He understands that by showing you off online, men will stay clear from you while the ladies will also get the memo that he is taken and keep off.

5. He remembers the things you tell him

Besides work and family, a guy who is not exclusive or trustworthy tends to have many distractions. His distractions often prevent him from remembering plans, agreements, the things you tell him in general. 

I have a friend whose boyfriend called her another lady’s name during an argument over his lateness for a date. When she pried deeper, it was no surprise; this guy was cheating on her with someone who bears the name. He has many distractions because he is not focusing on only you. 

A trustworthy man will remember the things you tell him because there are no distractions and focuses on only you.

6. He talks about his feelings Unprompted

Indeed, it is not all guys that like to talk about their feelings. It is a sign of masculinity not to talk about your feelings or show emotions to many. However, even the toughest of men find ways to express themselves to people they love. 

A trustworthy man does not have issues with talking about his feeling even though it makes him vulnerable. It means that he has nothing to hide and sees no reason why he cannot confide in you. However, a guy who never talks about his feelings except when you ask him is not someone you should trust.

7. He does not deflect from questions or get defensive

When someone is honest in a relationship, they do not shy away from questions, however complex. Instead, they welcome them as an avenue for further discussions. This is a sign that you can trust the guy. 

On the contrary, a person whose intentions are not genuine will deflect from questions, and they will get defensive if you persist. For instance, if you ask a man who is cheating on his wife why he is late, he might try to avoid the question or give a vague answer. If you choose to keep asking, he will get defensive and refuse to take responsibility for his actions because he is a liar.

8. He responds promptly to your texts and calls

He responds promptly to your texts and calls

A boyfriend who is not trustworthy will not answer their text messages and calls promptly. While I understand that sometimes people get busy and forget to respond to messages or calls immediately, but these are one-offs and should not be something that happens frequently. 

A guy who answers your calls and texts promptly is someone you can trust because it doesn’t matter where he is or what he’s doing, he still makes you a priority, and nothing triumphs the attention he accords you. 

9. You know his best friends, and they respect you

Trustworthy guys always tend to have close-knit friends. These are people that they trust and go to whenever they need to have fun or seek advice. When you are with a guy like this, it is always easy to know their whereabouts. 

Besides, knowing his best friends, it is worthy to note how his friends treat you. A serious guy is likely to tell his friends about you, and because his friends love him, they will like you too. Therefore, if you notice that a guy’s best friends are not nice to you or they do not respect you, it can be a sign that your guy does not speak well of you to them, and you should not trust him. 

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

10. He is inconsistent

Consistency is essential when gauging a guy’s trustworthiness. You see, when a guy seems to tell different versions of the same story, it makes you question his inter gritty. A trustworthy person does not change their beliefs or values based on who is watching. They are the same version of themselves irrespective of other people’s opinions. 

So, if you notice your guy struggles with staying true to himself, then it is a sign that you should not trust him. However, if he is the type to stick to what he stands for at all times, then you’ve got yourself a trustworthy man. 

11. He asks for your opinions on important things

There is a saying that people who trust others tend to be trustworthy, and you shouldn’t trust those who do not trust others. This means that if a guy trusts you enough to ask for your inputs on important decisions of his life, he is open about his affairs and does not mind you getting involved.

An untrustworthy guy, on the other hand, would have gone ahead to make these decisions without telling you. Such a man does not want you to know the important details of his life. Perhaps, he thinks of your presence as temporary and does not see the need to bring you into his world. 

12. He keeps to his promises

One of the characteristics of a gentleman is his ability to stick to his words. A gentleman knows that his promises are binding and will stop at nothing to redeem them. Therefore, when this man says he will do something, you can bet that he will do it. 

If you are with a guy who does not keep his words and sees nothing wrong in not fulfilling promises, that means you should not trust him. A trustworthy man does not fail on his promises. 

13. He does not shy away from PDA

While not everyone is a fan of public display of affection, there are other ways a person can choose to show physical affections in public, and one of them is holding hands. 

PDA allows everyone around you to know that you are in a relationship. Therefore one of the signs that you can trust a man is if he holds your hand in public, pecks, and kisses you irrespective of the crowd. He has nothing to hide and is not afraid of anyone seeing him because he is committed to only you. 

14. He does not avoid eye contact

They say the eyes are the window to the soul, and they can reveal things about a person even before they say it. In the absence of a medically diagnosed condition, when a person avoids eye contact with you, it means they lack confidence, or they are trying to hide a lie. 

You see, as humans, we pay attention to people’s body language, so if you are with a guy who does not avoid eye contact with you. Instead, he looks at you in the eye whenever he is talking to you. It means he is sure of his words, and you can trust him.

15. He does not pretend to like people

Are you dating a guy who will tell you negative things about a person today, but when they see this same person tomorrow, they pretend to like them? That is a sign that he is not trustworthy. I’m not advocating that we should be mean to people we don't like. 

However, when you pretend to like someone whose presence you can’t stand, it means that you want something from them or that you are a coward whose loyalty sways depending on what’s convenient to you. 

A trustworthy man is not afraid to say his mind and opinions, even when it involves people. They are not two-faced, and this is what makes people respect more honesty. 

16. He respects your time and does not cancel plans last minute 

He respects your time and does not cancel plans last minute

Being considerate of other people’s time is a sign of respect, and a man who is not trustworthy can never relate to this behavior. If a man is always punctual and does not cancel plans at the last minute, it is a sign that you can trust him.

Sure, people get caught up with work and other things during the day and lose track of time. However, if canceling plans at the last minute has become a habit, and he does not respect your time, these are signs that he has no regard for your time, and you are not a priority. 

17. He does not flirt with other girls

Without having to point it out, it is pretty evident that dating a man who flirts with other girls is not only disrespectful, but it’s a major red flag. There is always that constant question in your head of how far he can go with his flirtatious ways. You have these questions in your head because his actions make you not trust him. 

However, when you are with someone who does not flirt with other girls, it is easier to trust his feelings and intentions. By not flirting with other girls, he proves that you are the only one who has his attention and his actions make you trust him. 

18. He treats other people well

Any guy who treats you nicely but disrespects everyone else is not someone you should trust. It means he is not a good person and is only kind to those who can benefit him. 

On the other hand, a guy who is kind and polite with everyone irrespective of their role is someone you can trust. It means that even when you fall out of their good graces or have an argument, you trust him to remain kind to you and fight fair. 

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

19. He does not give you a reason to doubt him

There is a peace that comes with being in a relationship with someone you trust wholly. They seem to know what will make you raise an eyebrow and try to avoid them by remaining transparent at all times. He picks his calls in your presence, and he involves you in his personal life and decisions. 

So while you may be out there hunting for reasons why you should not trust your guy, it’s okay to step back and relax if he has not given you any reason to doubt him. 

20. You have free access to his phone

We live in a digital age where our phones hold a lot of secrets. It is easy to know about a person’s life and their whereabouts by going through their phone. 

If you have free access to your boyfriend’s phone and he shares his password with you, chances are, you can trust him, and he has nothing to hide. 

21. He is honest about his opinions

There is nothing worse than surrounding yourself with people who are scared of disagreeing with you. They will say yes to everything you do because they want to remain in your good graces. 

A guy who is honest about his opinions irrespective of the consequence or how it makes you feel is someone you can trust. While he might try to use softer terms in conveying his message, he will not lie to make you feel better. He knows that a constructive bitter truth is better than a beautiful lie, and your relationship is better off with the truth. 

22. He respects boundaries and is not manipulative

Irrespective of how long you have been in a relationship with someone, personal boundaries should always be respected. One of the signs you can trust a guy is when he respects your boundaries even when he disagrees with them. He does not try to manipulate or coerce you into doing something you do not want to do. 

23. You know his family, social, and workgroups

I know people in relationships that don't know where their partners work, let alone their colleagues. Perhaps, they have asked, but he provides a vague response. This can be a window to a much bigger problem - deception. 

Guys who are trustworthy will be detailed when talking about their family, friends, and work. They do not mind if you want to meet these people or visit their office because they have nothing to hide. 

FAQs

How do you tell if you can trust a guy?

Trust and secrets are two terms that can never go together if you are trying to establish a healthy relationship. You can know if to trust a guy by how much he reveals to you. For instance, a trustworthy guy will not mind your curiosity, and he doesn’t mind if you have access to his phone. He does not flirt with other girls and maintains eye contact with you when having a conversation. These are signs that he is honest and trustworthy.

What makes a man trust a woman?

When it comes to the question of if a man trusts a woman, fidelity plays a vital role. A man will trust any woman who has proven to be loyal. She trusts his decisions and endeavors irrespective of the circumstances they may find themselves in. When a man trusts a woman, he will not be afraid to show his vulnerability within the relationship. Therefore, a woman who is not judgmental and does not gossip can earn a man’s trust. 

How do you tell if a guy isn't right for you?

It’s never easy to decide if a guy is right for you immediately. However, here are three key determinants I use. First, you have to know if you are happy being with him in reality or just the idea of being in a relationship that you love. Secondly, do your friends and family express concern? Lastly, trust your instincts

How do you test a guy's character?

While communicating and asking questions are great ways to know a person, the best way to test a guy’s character remains to observe without judgment. Be observant in your relationship and pay attention to their body language, how they talk and relate with other people, and how they react to certain situations. 

What is a toxic personality disorder?

A person who has a toxic personality disorder always wants to be in control. They are often manipulative and know the right words to say or the right things to do to make you do their bidding. Being in a relationship with a person like this can add a lot of negativity to your life because he is a liar, and you will always have to deal with thoughts of doubt, anxiety, and confusion. It is your responsibility to detect these traits early on in a relationship.

To Conclude

Trust is a delicate and vital component of any relationship, and I understand the difficulties that come with identifying guys you can trust. I hope this article will serve as a guide for your relationship. If you enjoyed reading this piece, don’t forget to share it with your friends and leave a comment behind. 

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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