Do you wonder why men seem a lot more confident than women? Yeah, a lot of us do too. Some men are seen as daring go-getters who can smooth talk the hottest woman into dating them. Meanwhile, women are associated with adjectives like timid, gullible, and shy. Well, not anymore!
It’s very possible to smooth-talk a guy, you just have to master the basics, and you’ll beat him at his own game. It’s not just about what you say, there’s appearance, eloquence, poise, and confidence in the mix. That’s because a great conversation doesn’t just rely on what is said, a sharp or gentle approach has to be employed.
Now, let’s be truthful, men can be intimidating. A lot of them have a way with words and know exactly how to work a conversation. They know how to elevate the mood when things seem dry, and how to make you smile even when you’re in the worst mood. No, it’s not magic or an innate gift hidden deeply in the male gene.
If you want to know how to be a smooth talker, here are some tips below.
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Confidence is everything, and the good news is, that anyone can work on their self-confidence. Yes, it’s easier said than done, but it’s possible. Let’s take an example, you’re sitting across the table on a date. You can’t help feeling overly conscious about how loudly you’re chewing or if you’re showing too much cleavage.
I totally get it. However, regardless of how subtle you think you are when fidgeting, the other person will see through all those concerns. “OMG is there sauce on my chin, do my brows still look natural, is he bored?” don’t sweat about the things you can’t control, that’s how to gain the other speaker’s respect.
Sometimes, we don’t realize that the other party may be just as nervous. So keep those worries out and stay confident. Start with a solid introduction and think about how to trade opinions to make the conversation progress.
Nerves can compromise a conversation’s success. What’s one of the ways to get rid of nerves, teasing the other party. Now, remember, you’re not teasing to sound mean or condescending. Rather, you want to take control and lighten the mood. Besides, most guys like leading with cheesy lines like, “You’ve been running around my head all day”.
Well, call him out on that. Use a sharp or gentle approach and say something like, “Does that line still work on ladies?” That will certainly make him smile, and maybe even be the opener for another conversation.
You’re never fully dressed without a smile, right? Well, if you want to talk smoothly like a pro, smiling is a must-have. However, there’s still a strategy to smiling; you can’t be grinning all the way through. Just ensure you start with a smile and maintain a graceful look from then on to ensure a successful conversation.
You want the other person to feel as comfortable as possible when talking to you. Your facial expressions matter before you start talking. It may seem trivial, but such subtle nuances as frowning could make even a good friend get closed off from talking.
You also have to be conscious of timing. You shouldn’t smile when discussing a serious topic. Just keep the smile for those pique times when you’re paying a compliment, teasing, or listening to a joke.
Men love compliments, they just don’t show it as much. So, whether you’re talking to a good friend or discussing a serious topic, throw in some compliments. You could make the person’s day by knowing what to say and when to say it.
Saying nice things about their looks, style choice, achievements and other feats feed their ego. Compliments always make good conversation, and you’ll gain the other speaker’s respect if you know how to give compliments without being too obvious or commenting more on his style or general achievements than his facial or bodily features.
You could be saying all the right things, but then your body is saying something else. This can potentially ruin the entire conversation. The reason is simple, people don’t just judge what you say, they also consider how you say it. Do your eyes agree with what your lips are saying?
Or do you look awkward while making one of the most confident things? That could throw off your whole game. Keep an open body language when talking to a date, colleague, or business partner. When talking to someone you’re not so close to, ensure to use a formal title. Your movements shouldn’t be flirty either. Such subtle nuances may compromise the smooth talk.
Mystery is so crucial for any lady that wants to get the attention of a guy. Men love a woman who has that mysterious and daring look when talking. Mystery is an art in itself, and not all girls can master the craft. Start with a solid introduction to ensure the conversation’s success, but only identify points that won’t throw you off your game.
When talking in formal situations, you gain the other speaker’s respect by being subtle and not too revealing. Focus more on being a good listener, and stick to discussing shared interests and general topics.
When speaking in public, pace matters. First of all, addressing people with their formal title will gain you other speakers’ respect. To make the conversation progress smoothly, start with an effective introduction and don’t use any filler words when speaking. Identify points that resonate with the subject you’re speaking on and try not to stray off-topic.
Plus, if you speak too fast, the people listening may not understand your words. That’s why pace matters. The slower you talk the faster you can think and the easier it is for people to understand you.
If you want to have a successful conversation, it’s important to stay composed. It keeps the nerves away and makes you seem more confident. So, whether you’re talking about war’s evils or an alien invasion, keep your cool. Some topics are so interesting we want to gush all about them.
Take a breath, maybe even look away for a second to regain composure before diving into those shared interests again.
You’ll make the other person’s day by focusing more on what they have to say. Plus, it’s less likely to say something irrelevant when you listen more. Let them rave about their ex, global warming, and the cost of fish in the market. It’s a nice outlet for them, plus the more you listen, the more you learn.
Don’t be afraid to give the center stage to someone else. However, you shouldn’t lose your voice either, chip in and ask questions every now and then.
“Is that what you’re really passionate about?” “How did that make you feel?” “Do you think you’ll ever paint again?” Every smooth-talker is the master of the conversation. However, if the other person doesn’t feel comfortable, they won’t share a lot or open up.
Plus, you’ll be making the other person’s day by asking meaningful and thoughtful questions as the conversation progresses. Remember, you’re not interviewing him, these questions should be timely and relevant.
There’s nothing wrong with a little small talk when it comes to smooth-talking. A lot of people mistake small talk for fluff, and that’s wrong. Fluff will make any conversation boring, while small talk can be very witty and flirtatious. Asking about the weather, recent news or war’s evils are good examples of small talk.
Small talk aims to establish the initial conversation and ease tensions. It can help two strangers bond almost immediately if you know how to employ these conversation starters.
Sweet talkers know their way around the English language. It’s one of the things that impresses people. Their play on words, exquisite diction, and smooth pronunciation just make the conversation flow. So, if you want to talk smoothly, this is the perfect time to start perfecting your diction.
Wouldn’t it be awkward if you’re confidently making a joke, or giving a compliment, but then mix up the words or say them wrong? Yeah.
Empathy is another important value to have as a smooth talker. That’s because people won’t open up that easily unless they feel you’re a relatable person. Smooth talkers don’t actually have to say much.
Sometimes, it’s more about what they’re not saying and how well they listen. This doesn’t mean you should be silent all through. Just ensure that you’re empathetic enough to listen, know when to trade opinions, and don’t be dismissive or insensitive.
Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it will certainly give life to any conversation. Some people would just appreciate someone who asks the right follow-up questions and actually listens. Don’t be in a hurry to change the subject, learn to dive deeper. Ask about random things, follow up on a previous conversation or ask about what they are working on at the moment.
This is what small talk aims to achieve. The other party feels heard and won’t mind going on and on about their life.
It may seem weird thinking about all the other conversations you have had in the past. However, that’s the best way to figure out your weaknesses. It’s easier to think about what went wrong before. Or maybe even the point where you lost control of the conversation.
Besides, one of the best ways to prepare for an exam is to study past questions. In this case, study your conversation habits.
Did you sound too needy before? Were you too quiet or to yourself? Answering these questions will help you learn from any past mistakes. After thinking about your former strategies and conversation bloopers, it’s time to practice.
Talking to an imaginary guy in front of the mirror may seem absurd. But nowadays, what’s not. We use many unconventional ways to get better at things. So don’t be afraid of practicing until you get perfect.
A smooth talker is a master of speech, they know what to say and do at exactly the right time. All the odds may be against them, but somehow, they’ll slither their way around things.
If someone has the skills to turn a situation around or sway things to their own advantage, they are smooth talkers. A sweet talker is also very charming and social, they have good people skills and know how to work the room.
Are you calm, empathetic, and very good at talking to people? Do people tell you how smooth the words that come out of your mouth are? Then you may be one. Another way to know is how people perceive your intentions. Do guys constantly feel like you’re flirting with them when you’re actually not? That may be another sign you are a smooth talker.
The first skill to master as a smooth talker is creating the right environment. If you want to smooth out a conversation, the people involved must feel comfortable first.
When people feel like you can relate to them, they let down their guard faster. Plus, you have to feel comfortable in your own skin as well. People have to see how calm and put together you are before listening to what you have to say. If you are talking to more than one person, it’s also important to ensure all of them are in the loop.
One of the tricks to smooth-talking is maintaining eye contact. The guy needs to see how comfortable you are when speaking to him. Your poise should also exude confidence, however, don’t come on too strong. Thanks to the male-dominated world we live in, being too forward translates to being overly needy or trying too hard.
Plus, when you’re talking to him, be as subtle as possible with your comments and compliments. However, don’t conceal your sass, and don’t let him talk smoothly first. If he does, immediately call him out and have a good laugh about it. Remember, not to overthink things and enjoy the moment.
There are many ways to start a conversation. You can try giving a compliment, cracking a joke, or asking for information as an effective introduction. You can also show interest in something they are doing, ask for help or offer to help them.
If you want to be bolder, make a sarcastic comment, talk about the weather, or ask them to tell you something personal. For example, “I hear you’re really good with your hands, is that true?”
Did you enjoy reading through this list? I sure enjoyed writing it. I believe that more ladies should perfect the art of smooth-talking. It will be a nice game changer and probably make conversations a lot more interesting.
Just remember, never try to force conversations. To be a smooth talker, your confidence and fluency have to seem natural. Do you have any questions or comments on the topic? Feel free to leave them in the section below. Plus, don’t forget to share this article with others. Good luck.