An African proverb says, "you can only know who you love; you can't know for certain who really loves you." How true those words ring! Whether young or older, you must have had those troubling moments when you lost your peace because you were (or are!) getting confusing signals from someone you cherished deeply.
Their speech, body language, and other signs all kept giving you mixed signals.
You are beginning to think that maybe this person isn't really into me, but just as you're about to lose hope, you see a spark that rekindles it! Soon it fades again. Or you wonder, why is my crush avoiding me after all my efforts to get him to notice me?
Honestly, if you're seeing mixed signals from your crush, then there's a huge possibility they don't like you. That's because if your crush likes you as much as you do, he'll try to do everything to show it one way or the other. They will make it pretty obvious, let you into their personal space and will cherish spending time with you.
Sadly, no one wants to fall into the hands of a player who is versatile in playing the game. You see, a player only wants the juice, and once he's done with it, the container is tossed aside like an outdated toy. So the player goes on to the next shiny object.
So if you want to learn about the signs your crush doesn't like you, sit back, relax, and digest these foolproof signs to let you know what you can do to get over such a potential heartbreak.
But before we go on,it's essential to let you know that it is in no way abnormal to find out that your feelings for your crush aren't mutual. Strangely, your crush may have other friends he's also crushing on who is also not reciprocating the gesture. Such a waste!
Having a crush could be such a satisfying experience as you believe you are at the start of something special. But it all could be a dream, when you hopelessly spend time expecting them to return your feelings.
Without further ado, here are the signs your crush doesn't like you.
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We know how much you want it to be true, but more often than not, it's not always the case. Your crush may not really like you despite your best efforts. This is known to cause lots of emotional trauma, but while we'll deal with getting through it in a moment, here are signs to look out for to confirm your worst fears. There are more, but here are the 29 most obvious signs that your crush doesn't like you back.
Your crush should show signs of displeasure seeing you soaking up attention from someone else, even your good friend. If he doesn't mind seeing you cozy around someone else or even acts like he likes the idea of you and the other guy, that's an obvious sign he doesn't mind.
If your crush is into you, even if he doesn't show it, he won't be pleased that you seem to like someone else. So, if he's not jealous at all, then it is a clear sign he doesn't like you the same way.
Social media is the easiest way of connecting with loved ones. One way of knowing if your crush likes you is to watch their behavior around your social media. Apart from connecting better via social media platforms, if he’s genuinely into you, none of your posts will go unnoticed.
And he will most likely comment on and like your posts and send DMs. He'll also spend a lot of time viewing your statuses, talking to you, and telling you how beautiful your pictures are. If he's not a frequent visitor to your social media, then it can be one of the signs your crush doesn't like you.
There are many signs that can give you clues if your crush likes you. Watch his body language. When you're into someone, it's difficult to act normal around them. Try as you may; it's difficult to remain as composed as you wish.
If your presence doesn't change anything about him, and he continues just the same way before you appear and after you're gone, it's an obvious sign your crush doesn't like you. Beware before you invest all your heart in such a venture.
Nothing says your crush isn’t interested in you like seeing your messages pass without a reply, despite him reading them. Sometimes, some messages may not require a response, but there's always something to say to someone you like.
When you notice some of your messages are delivered, and you receive no reply, then you should beware. It's one of the signs your crush doesn't like you.
Texts are a very important way of knowing how important you are to someone. When you get message replies from your crush, which are often simple and straight to the point, it says a lot.
Please look out for emojis, smileys, and gifs. When texts to your phone are always plain messages and are not spiced up with anything, then there's a huge possibility he is not interested in having a relationship.
Everyone loves to stay where they feel appreciated. If you hang around your crush and find out that you don't feel as special as you wish, then that's a good sign your crush doesn't like you or is not interested in you romantically.
If he is, he’a likely to spend all his time around you, making you feel appreciated and not wanting to go. So, if you observe that he treats others similarly or even better than he treats you, the feelings aren't mutual.
This is perhaps the most typical sign. It's one of the clues your crush doesn't like you. When you keep hearing phrases like “Oh, you're such a reliable friend, thank you!” Newsflash, you've been dumped in the friend zone.
When your crush does everything to let you know you're a friend and a good one at that, then he's not into you. If he's comfortable with you being a friend and nothing more, he may be your love; you're not his.
If you notice that your crush doesn't spend time on things that concern you, that could be a signal that he doesn't seem to have any deep interest in you. Also, if he rarely makes compromises for you, even when you ask for it, there's no reason to doubt that your crush is not into you.
If someone truly likes you, he dreams of being with you and won't do anything to jeopardize that chance. However, if he's comfortable dating some other girl while you're aware without any attempt to hide it from you, he cares less about you.
Sometimes a person who knows you like him may deliberately try to make you jealous, but if he likes you, he won't risk it.
One of the things you want to do with someone you care deeply about is conversation. You cherish every opportunity to share moments. However, it takes two to tango. If you like him, you want to speak with him. A heart-to-heart talk requires two people. If you can't remember it ever happening between you two, then your crush isn’t into you.
When you're with someone or something you love, time becomes irrelevant. You might notice that he isn't patient or interested in listening to you whenever you are up for any discussion.
Also, check if he makes you feel like you are taking too much time whenever you talk, then it's a sign your crush isn’t interested in you.
You don't have to be dating someone to spend time with them. If you're the only one who looks for opportunities to be with him, and he doesn't make time out to be with you, then it's a big sign your crush doesn't share the same feelings.
Sadly, you take every opportunity to be in his presence and hang around him, but he hardly reciprocates. Does he fail to show up for your events giving flimsy excuses while being available at similar events of others? Then, you have your answer.
If he doesn't tell you things you feel you should know, and you end up hearing about it from others, he doesn't care enough about you. When something great or tragic happens, the first people you share it with are those that you love the most.
The fact that your crush forgot to tell you about happenings in his life while telling some others gives you a rough idea about your place in his life.
This goes both ways. When you hit new milestones in your personal and professional life, and you get no words of congratulations from your crush on your achievements, you know that he hasn't followed you closely enough.
If he hasn't been following you enough to know about changes in your life, then it's one of the clues your crush doesn't like you very much.
As a woman, you must have observed that one of the most essential traits of a lot of men is possessiveness. Even animals display this but humans do it in a subtle way.
Whenever your crush finds out that you're seeing someone other than him, the response might look like disappointment, disapproval, and withdrawal. That shows he has lots of interest in you. If his knowledge that you're seeing someone doesn't bother him, and he doesn’t make it a big deal, then he may just not be that into you.
Out of sight is out of mind, goes the saying. But that's only for normal stuff. No matter how busy a person is, there'll always be room for the important stuff.
When it involves people you love, you think about them all the time, even if you don't see them often. Once the information you share with your crush is forgotten the moment you turn your back, you don't have a space in his heart.
This is probably the clearest of all the clues your crush isn’t into you. Your birthday is the special day you get to be celebrated with your friends and loved ones.
Watch out for how your crush reaches out. If he only responds to social media prompts and doesn't communicate especially with you on that day, then it means he doesn't count you to be special. Moreover, if he forgets or ignores you altogether, it is a bad sign, unfortunately.
If you've started feeling frustrated with how he responds to you but still choose to be hopeful, here's a quick one. Cut off communication deliberately and watch how he reacts.
We may have a deal if he reaches out and keeps the conversation going. But if he goes quiet, you're the only member of this group chat. Log out.
If he seems not to show signs of “not getting enough of you”, your crush is not interested in a relationship. Also, if he doesn't stare at you when you're together or doesn't gush over your Instagram photos, then he's probably just a friend. Nothing more.
Beware, if you spend a lot of time together, maybe at work or school, and you've never caught him secretly staring, it might be a sign that your crush isn’t into you.
Whenever you have the opportunity to hang out, and you don't hear him tell you deep things, it may be because he doesn't think you are that important.
If your discussions are only limited to things common to you, like class or office work, and don't go beyond that, then you have a colleague or, at most, a friend.
If your crush keeps rejecting your show of love or even appears to show that he doesn't appreciate your continuous concern, that's an excellent reason for you to let go before you're hurt.
It is one thing not to appreciate your efforts. It is another to make you feel unwelcome despite trying your best to show genuine concern.
In this era, this is the original sin. When you notice your crush doesn't follow you on social media, you might consider giving up. It's bad enough not to engage with your posts. If he doesn't follow you at all or has unfollowed you, all you have together is friendship.
If the things you're concerned about don't interest him, or he shows very little interest in things that interest you, then you may be crushing on someone that doesn't give a damn about you. Also, if you try to get him involved and he only feigns interest but does nothing tangible about anything you bring to his attention, this is a huge sign.
If you find an impenetrable wall anytime you try to probe into who your crush really is; then you should beware. Ideally, if he likes you, he will likely share his issues with you, especially his personal life.
Also, if after attempts of wanting to know him, you have little or no results, then you may be playing in the wrong field.
Gifts are a love language, and let's assume your crush doesn't speak it; it is still essential that you receive something worthwhile from him at one point or the other. If you cannot recall ever getting a gift from him, then it's likely that he doesn't think that much about you.
So, if he doesn’t deem it fit to impress you small gifts he knows would make you happy, it’s high time you realized you are on your own.
Ok, he reaches out to you once in a while. But only when he needs something from you. That's not good enough. You may excuse him for being an introvert, but he must check on you occasionally to see if he genuinely has you in mind. If he only calls on you when he needs urgent information from you, then you should stop hoping for a relationship.
Have you observed that your crush remains the same around you as he is around other people? It is because there's nothing special he feels for you.
If he genuinely finds you special, his mood will change, and you won't mistake his excitement once you appear around him. He might even find subtle ways to impress you. If he doesn't radiate joy when you're around, it may be because he doesn't get excited by you.
If you're increasingly frustrated with this lack of attention, you may have a crush who doesn't like you. Sadly, you spend virtually your entire waking hours thinking about him, and you only wish he spares some thought for you.
You assume he does, at least. But from what you've read so far, you now confirm what you've always suspected, that he doesn't think of you in that sense.
Finally, take clues from your gut as well. You just sense signs that your crush isn’t into you. The clues must have been obvious, but this is more of a gut feeling.
You know you truly like this person but somewhere deep down, you feel it's all in vain. He also seems not to get even a little hint about you. You think it's a waste. Most times, you are right.
Now that we've looked at how to know if your crush doesn't like you, it's time to switch gears. Here's how to get over a crush who doesn't like you back.
How to get over a crush who doesn't like you back is the next step to take now that you know that he seems not to like you. Spare yourself the nasty emotions and stop making excuses for the feelings.
It looks like you are all alone in this adventure. You feel let down and disappointed. You are discouraged and frustrated. You've invested lots of emotional energy into this person, but you have reaped nothing.
So, what do you do when your crush doesn’t like you back? How do you get over him and continue with your life? Here's what to do if your crush doesn't like you. We compiled proven techniques that are certain to help you get your life back.
It is not abnormal to have a crush that may be beyond your reach or who doesn't like you. After all, we don’t choose who we fall in love with. It doesn't mean that something is wrong with you or that you aren't good enough.
We all have preferences, and it may just be that you're not the preference of your crush. Meanwhile, you'll likely feel discouraged and sad when you finally realize these truths. Don't judge yourself. Come to terms with it, and don't deny that you feel hurt. If you never made your intentions known, you can move on faster as there will be better relationships ahead.
Talking to someone about how you feel could be a lifesaver. The first thing it does is demystify the whole situation. You can even talk to someone while still unsure what your crush thinks about you. But if you've confirmed from the signs listed above that he isn't into you, you may need to talk to someone about how hurt you are.
Technically, no one has hurt you, and he can't be to blame for not liking you. But you need to talk to someone about it. Be careful to pick a counselor or someone who cares deeply about you, like a parent, grandparent, or close friend. If you end up sharing such sensitive issues with a lousy person, you could end up causing more harm than good.
Whoa. Doesn't it sound harsh? He just broke your heart. Well, technically, he didn't.
You don't want to sound desperate, but now that you have confirmed that your crush doesn't like you, you can sit down for a heart-to-heart discussion. Tell him how you feel, and let him know that it's ok not to like you, but you just wanted him to know.
While this may seem extreme, you may be surprised that it works. In some instances, it may even lead to something real. But before talking about your feelings to a crush who doesn't like you, please, remember to be sure that you're ready to move on. Never do this as a desperate tactic to get him to like you. It won't work!
Once you discover that your crush doesn't like you, you may be tempted to cut him off or even resent him. That won't be correct. It doesn't even make sense. Remember, one proof that you have got your groove back is that you can relate with him (again) without strings attached.
To help you overcome any resentment, the truth is that there's probably someone somewhere who would die to be with you but isn't even your type. So, what goes around comes around! It's just the way life works.
Finding true love may not be as simple as loving someone. The person has to love you back for the equation to be balanced. Just as you may love someone who doesn't love you, so may someone love you who you don't love. With time, you'll find your perfect match. And it could still turn out to be your crush! Talk about fairytales…
Give yourself some time. Time, they say, heals all wounds. You need time to get over the disappointment. In fact, you may even take some time off as an excuse to be away from him for a while if you usually see him daily.
You can rather spend your time on fun activities and find fulfillment in something else. Never feel as though there's something wrong with you. No, there isn't. But with time, you can find the strength to move on. It’s time for some self-love, so do something nice for yourself.
If you see your crush every day, you can test whether he likes you by looking out for these things:
Does he stare at you? Does he spend a lot of time chatting with you? Does he act anxiously around you? Does he take time out to be with you? Does he never miss your special days or look for opportunities to surprise you? Does he help your self-esteem?
If the answer to all these questions is yes, then congrats, dear, it makes sense to assume that your crush likes you. So, look out for these signs to test if your crush likes you.
Lowkey, love is like trading by barter. You must be willing to accept something from someone interested in what you have. If your crush doesn't like you, move on!
It may seem difficult or even look like a huge loss, but if your crush doesn't like you, you haven't lost anything. Remember, there's probably someone crushing on you who you also do not like.So, please take it as a battle lost, but go on to win the war.
Once you're confident your crush doesn't like you, give up. Doing otherwise would be counterproductive. Giving up on a crush that doesn't like you is like wiping your tears over spilled milk. Any further emotions won't yield any results.
We've looked at obvious signs your crush doesn't like you. If you've experienced such heartbreak realizing that there are no mutual feelings between the two of you, then it's not the end of the world. In reality, it is a common experience.
You need to know how to get over a crush who doesn't like you back. Remember also that your feelings about a person may change once you get to know him better. Several relationships have suffered because they went on emotions alone.
If you find out that your crush doesn't like you, dust yourself up, and move on with your life. We outlined several steps you can take to get yourself up and running again. Also, we can assure you that whatever disappointment you face from this will only make you stronger. It will also help you to guard your heart better before falling for anyone again. Once bitten, twice shy!