When you find yourself having fallen head over heels in love with someone, it can feel nearly impossible to explain why – you just do. You can adore a person for everything they are and everything they are not, and yet you still feel yourself clam up when faced with the daunting question, “why?”.
I struggle at times to explain why I love my own boyfriend, I just know I do.
Apparently, “because you’re nice” is not the kind of answer anyone is hoping for. We want details, and we want to be able to tell our favorite people exactly why we love them.
There’s something so beautiful about being told why we’re loved. We crave to hear what it is about us that makes us so lovable, and yet, when it comes to answering those questions ourselves, the mind tends to run blank.
I have come up with a list of ideas, to remind you of all those little and large reasons why you really love him, so you know exactly what to say when the time comes.
- 1 1. You Love Him For Who He Is
- 2 2. You Think He’s Really Attractive
- 3 3. You Love His Sense of Humor
- 4 4. You Love How Kind He Is
- 5 5. You Feel Free To Be Yourself With Him
- 6 6. You Feel Safe With Him
- 7 7. You Love That Can Count On Him
- 8 8. He Makes You Want To Be A Better Person
- 9 9. He Inspires You To Shoot For The Stars
- 10 Conclusion
1. You Love Him For Who He Is
Of course, and likely most importantly, you love his personality. You love him for exactly who he is, flaws and all. Maybe you love him because he is assertive and determined, or maybe you love him because he is gentle and laid-back. We are instinctively drawn to a certain type of personality, and more often than not, we’ll be drawn to the same types of men over and over. Some of us can’t resist a “bad boy”, others a “dad type”. Whoever it is we choose, we have to love who they are as a person before we fall for any other part of them. If you didn’t love his personality, you wouldn’t love him at all.
Maybe you love him because he’s very smart, very good at cooking or very good at sports. You love him for whatever makes him special. Even if his special talent is making very good fart noises with his armpit, if you love him, you’ll love him for it. Who he is, is the fundamental reason you fell for him. If you find yourself saying “I wouldn’t change who he is for the world”, then you’ve fallen in love with his personality.
If you’re not sure about your type, or you’d like to see if your man is your type, watch this quick video and take the test – it got mine right!
2. You Think He’s Really Attractive
It might be a superficial reason, but being physically attracted to your man is important! You’re allowed to be a little shallow sometimes! You might love his eyes, or his smile, or his beard or his tummy, whatever floats your boat!
In fact, when you love a person, you find them more attractive than they might really be, and more attractive than you thought they were when you first started dating! Think Beauty and the Beast – finding someone attractive regardless of what they see as “flaws” is a true sign of love. We’re way more likely to ignore their funny-shaped toes or crooked teeth if we’ve fallen deeply in love. Scientifically, we like to think we’re doing quite well for ourselves, that we’ve chosen a good attractive man, so the hotter we find them, the more we might be in love with them.
Let him know that you think he looks great, and tell him that you love the way he looks. It’ll mean the world to him to hear it!
3. You Love His Sense of Humor
Making someone laugh is the perfect way to bond. There’s nothing that feels quite as good as laughing until you shed tears, and getting to do that with the man in your life – perfection! Having the same sense of humor is typically super important in a relationship, unless you don’t enjoy laughter! Maybe you love his sarcastic wit or his goofy dance moves, or maybe you love the way he can find a pun in anything. Whatever it might be, it’s a no brainer that if he makes you laugh, then you love him for it. Studies even show that the more a man makes a woman laugh, the more attractive she’ll find him, and the more likely she’ll be to want to date him, and if the pair laughs together, the more interested they’ll be in each other!
It’s so important that even in the toughest moments, he can still make you smile. Sometimes, making you laugh so hard you pee a little isn’t what you’re looking for. Sometimes, when we say we’re looking for someone with a great sense of humor, it just means we dream of spending our days with someone who doesn’t take life so seriously! You might love your man because he can keep things light in trying times and doesn’t always get bogged down in the minor inconvenience.
4. You Love How Kind He Is
This one seems self-explanatory, if he’s kind to you, that’s certainly one of the reasons you love him. It feels sad to say but being kind to your partner isn’t always a given, if your man goes out of his way to always be nice, kind and caring towards you, then you should definitely feel some extra love for him. We’ve all heard countless heartbreaking stories of relationships gone wrong, where one partner has hurt another with no remorse. It is, unfortunately, all too common to find yourself in a relationship with someone who doesn’t respect you, or treat you kindly.
It feels a little obvious to say, but it’s a fundamental part of my own love story. I adore my own boyfriend, not just because he treats me nicely, but because he shows me unconditional kindness and strives to never hurt my feelings. It is underrated and yet essential that you love the person you are with, not regardless of how kind they are, but specifically because of that. It’s so easy to be mean or cold, if you’ve found someone who is warm and loving as often as they possibly can be, then let them know that’s why you love them!
5. You Feel Free To Be Yourself With Him
Have you ever felt like you’ve wanted to hide a part of yourself when you’re around certain people? Maybe it was a hobby or an interest, or even a body insecurity. It’s likely that with your partner, you don’t feel this way at all, or at least you shouldn’t. You might love him because he makes you feel like you don’t have to pretend to be anything other than your unique self. When you’re with him, do you feel like you can sing those High School Musical songs you still love? Or do you feel like you can reveal the secrets hidden behind your makeup? If you do, then you’re definitely in love with him, and this is definitely why!
Not only does it mean that you love him, that you feel comfortable to be exactly who you are with him, but it also means he loves you too! If you can be unapologetically yourself around him, it means he loves you enough to never make you feel like you should be anything different. He never makes you feel judged or wrong for the strange things you like or the most secret hidden parts of you. If you love him for letting you be yourself, then I’d be willing to bet you love him for being himself too. I’m sure he has his quirks too, and you love him anyway. If you can both be exactly who you want to be around each other, then you’re pretty lucky!
6. You Feel Safe With Him
In a world that can be pretty scary at times, it’s important to feel a sense of safety and security. For many of us, we love our boyfriends because they make us feel safe and protected. Evolutionarily, women have always wanted to be with a man who could defend them. In the earliest days, this meant protection from saber-tooth tigers and other angry cavemen. As society continued to evolve, women still relied on men to keep them safe from harm and to provide them with the means to survive – money, a home, and a family. Generations ago, a good man that a woman could feel safe with was one who brought home the bacon, sometimes literally. He didn’t have to be nice, or gentle, only strong and successful to protect his lady and his family from poverty and the gazes of other men.
These days, we don’t need, or want, any of that. We are financially independent and strong enough to fight our own battles. Dangers don’t come in the form of tigers and Vikings, but we still crave the feeling of protection from a man. We don’t need a big strong masculine man to sweep us off our feet and keep us safe from harm. To me, feeling safe now means to trust I’m in no danger.
I know that with my own boyfriend, I never have to wonder if I might be hurt, in a crowd, or in the car. He drives carefully with me and stands in front of me when we cross the road. I bet your partners do similar, small acts of protectiveness that make you feel secure with him. If you feel safe, emotionally and physically with your man, chances are, that’s something you love him for.
7. You Love That Can Count On Him
Being reliable is a very attractive quality, and if your boyfriend can be relied on then you’ll definitely love him for it. No one wants to be committed to a flaky mess, and chances are, if they aren’t reliable, they probably aren’t that committed to you either. Can you count on him to be there for you when the chips are down? Being supported by the person you love through your hardest times is all anyone could ever want, and if you receive that kind of comfort from your partner, you’ll most likely love him for it.
Spontaneity is a good characteristic to have, but it’s also valuable to have a man who is predictable at times. It’s comforting to know that if you needed him, he would be there. Whether it’s support in the face of tragedy or a lift to a doctor’s appointment, you can’t go wrong with a partner who can be relied on to be there for you. We could never expect him to drop everything to run to our side for a broken nail, but it feels great to know that he will be there through thick and thin – and we’d be there for them too.
8. He Makes You Want To Be A Better Person
It might be cliche to say that you love him because he makes you want to be a better person, but it’s almost always true. Real love will transform you in so many ways, because of your devotion to another person. You love him because he makes you want to check all of your bad habits and change those bad behaviors. You love him so deeply that you know you have to treat him as well as he deserves, so you learn to put your own selfishness aside. When you love a person, you suddenly find yourself wanting to try. Try to be a better person, try to achieve those lifelong goals of yours, try to put more good into the world. A core reason to love any person is that they inspire you to be better and to do better.
Sometimes, they might even inspire you to be a healthier person, mentally and physically. When my parents met, my Dad was a heavy smoker and my Mum couldn’t stand it. He quit cold turkey, as soon as he thought he might lose her over it. They’ve been happily married for over 20 years now, and his lungs are as healthy as can be. Some might quit unhealthy habits, some might decide to get fit, others are inspired to improve their mental health. When you him, you’ll probably find yourself looking at the world through rose-colored lenses, and you’ll want to be better, kinder and happier. You love him because his love makes you want to be the best version of yourself, because that’s what he deserves.
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9. He Inspires You To Shoot For The Stars
True love is one that can exist beside all your wildest hopes and dreams. Love knows no bounds and one of the main reasons you might love your boyfriend is that he encourages you and inspires you to achieve all your dreams. In the past, women have had to put their goals on hold to preserve their relationships, marriages, and families, but not anymore. Your partner should encourage you to take on all of your hopes and dreams, and offer to be right beside you while you do it, and you probably love them for that.
Sometimes it can be easy to get lost in self-doubt, and in those times, we’re so thankful for a partner who pushes us to keep trying. It can be hard to watch the person you love made big changes, whether that means moving across the country, or taking on new work that might use up more of their time. When your man fully supports the choices you make and encourages you to keep going even when those choices don’t always benefit them, they’re being entirely unselfish – because they love you so much. When a person you love wants the best for you, you feel so motivated to keep trying. You’ll love you boyfriend even more when you see them cheering for you, no matter what your goal is, no matter the impact on him, because he wants to see you happy.
Did this list help you? If you like it, let us know in the comments and share it with the people you love.
It’s so important to tell the people you love how you feel, and to tell them what makes you feel that way. Maybe you’ll even get lucky and they’ll tell you their reasons too! Spread the love!
Tell us in the comments some of the reasons you love your man, and if some of mine might have helped you out!
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