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When A Guy Doesn't Want To Sleep With You (25 Possible Meanings)

by Sonya Schwartz

Finding out that your partner doesn't want to sleep with you can feel like the worst thing ever. No woman ever wants to be rejected. Neither does she want her advances turned down. However, these things happen in life. When a guy doesn't want to sleep with you, the signs could be very telling.

It starts with him creating some distance from you, followed by a sense of displeasure whenever you are around him. Anytime you try to get your man to notice you, he deliberately puts you off, citing one excuse or the other.

Look no further dear, your significant other doesn't want to sleep with you. In my experience, things like this don't just happen like that; there's always an underlying reason for it. So many possible scenarios are likely playing in your mind right now. You probably think he is having an affair with another woman or that he no longer finds you attractive.

Whatever his reasons are, remember that this is only a phase, and you will get past it. This post will reveal some of the possible reasons your boyfriend or husband may have for refusing to sleep with you.

When A Guy Doesn’t Want To Sleep With You

1. He feels you are moving too fast

This happens in relationships where one partner is not yet ready to commit to the other. Unlike your boyfriend, you are catching strong feelings too fast. That may be the reason your significant other is refraining from sleeping with you. 

Both of you are definitely on varying emotional levels. What's more, your man may be considering other means of deepening your emotional bonds other than sex.

2. He doesn't want to ruin anything

He doesn't want to ruin anything

Your partner's love for you and your budding relationship may outweigh that of his love for sex. In an attempt to dissuade you from thinking that he is after hitting with you, he puts off the idea from his mind for the time being. When a guy doesn't want to sleep with you, the chances are that he doesn't want to ruin the relationship.

3. He's yet to move past something you did

If you cheated on your partner in the past, he will likely find it difficult to sleep with you again. Anytime he tries to touch you, the thought of another man's hand on you wouldn't let him through with it. It could also be that your significant other hasn't moved past a problem you both had in the past. He's probably still hurting emotionally and needs time to heal.

4. He's insecure about his body

Like women, guys are overly insecure about their bodies and looks. Very few guys admit to having insecurities about their bodies as though it is akin to being labeled inadequate and vulnerable. Guys who feel that they are not good-looking or too sexy enough don't like ladies seeing their nakedness. Body insecurity is probably why your significant other doesn't want to sleep with you.

5. There is something else on his mind

When a guy has problems he is dealing with, the last thing on his mind will be sex. Your significant other may probably be dealing with some life problems at the moment. That's why it seems as if he is physically and emotionally distant from you. Instead of weighing him down with your incessant complaints, help him find a workable solution. That's a quicker way of getting him back into your bed.

6. He's likely cheating on you

This is one of the most rational explanations for your partner's sudden behavior. If your man is not getting the sex from, chances are he is getting it elsewhere. It could be a case of him wanting to try something new or loss of attraction. Either way, cheating is never a good thing, considering how much you have put into the relationship.

7. His beliefs and principles won't let him

Your significant other may be a very religious man who takes his faith seriously. Certain religions, say Christianity, kick against the concept of sleeping with your partner before marriage

Religion aside, your man could have some principles he upholds, which could include not engage in pre-marital sex. If that's the case, allow him to come to terms on his own volition, so he doesn't end up blaming you at the end.

8. He has ulterior motives

It's not just women who are gold diggers; there are also male gold diggers. The nature of the job you do or the family background you come from may have piqued your guy's interest. For guys like this, sex is the last thing on their minds. If your partner falls in this category of men with ulterior motives, you must be extra cautious in handling the situation.

9. You no longer catch his fancy

You no longer catch his fancy

It's possible that your significant other won’t find you appealing anymore. Your presence no longer inspires desire or attraction, which drives the wedge between you two. There are ways to get him running back head over heels for you. 

Start by updating your looks and working towards becoming an embodiment of sweetness and passion. By doing so, he will develop a special interest in you.

10. He's probably asexual

Someone who is asexual is incapable of developing any sexual desire whatsoever. If your significant other identifies as asexual, it puts you in a complicated situation. At some point, you have to decide on whether to stay or abandon the ship. Not many people can cope in a sexless relationship or marriage.

11. He doesn't love you anymore

It's definitely not what you were hoping to hear, but it's a possibility that you can't rule out. Some men don't sleep with women they don't share some form of emotional connection with. The reality of things at this point maybe that he doesn't have feelings for you anymore. You have to accept the fact that your time together as a couple has reached its end.

12. He has low libido

Your significant other may be struggling to cope with you sexually. His sex life may not be as vibrant and energetic as yours or how you envision it to be. To save himself some embarrassment, your man decides to abstain from sleeping with you entirely. 

So you would know, many men struggle with sustaining their libidos as they get older. Rather than get angry or frustrated, your role as a wife is to support your spouse wholeheartedly.

13. He has a health condition

Your significant other may not want to sleep with you if he has some underlying medical condition. Some conditions that affect sexual performance include diabetes, hormonal imbalance, heart disease, and kidney failure. 

He may decide against telling you for fear of putting you into panic mode. Notwithstanding, you have to get him to talk about it and encourage him to see a medical doctor.

14. Male menopause has probably set in

A guy's sexual appetite decreases as he gets older due to the low production of testosterone and hormones. This condition is known medically as male menopause and occurs amongst men who are above 50 years old. The good news is that not all guys experience it, and those who do have to be well advanced in age.

15. He has discovered other means of satisfying his sexual cravings

He has discovered other means of satisfying his sexual cravings

There are many ways of satisfying one's sexual cravings that don't involve engaging in sexual intercourse. Guys are fond of finding satisfaction in porn sites or adult magazines if they are not experiencing fulfillment with their partners. If your partner falls in this category, you need to act quickly and decisively before it turns into an addiction.

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

16. His past experiences still taunt him

There's every tendency that your significant other may have been in an unpleasant and unhealthy relationship in the past. These ugly experiences may somewhat affect his sexual relations with another woman going forward. His fears and concerns from his previous relationships may likely be stopping him from sleeping with you.

17. There's something you are doing wrong

Sometimes, the only possible explanation could be that you are doing something wrong. Your significant other may favor doing certain things whenever you are intimate, which you may not like. To not force you into doing something you don't like, he decides against having intercourse with you.

18. He has friend-zoned you

When a guy doesn't want to sleep with you, he may have friend-zoned you. He clearly does not see you in the same light as you see him. Where you see a lover, he sees a friend and nothing more. While this is not what you were hoping to hear, you have to respect it and move on with life.

19. He has some reservations about you

If your partner suddenly starts acting up, he may probably have found out something about you. Your best bet is to engage him in a conversation so you can clear his doubts and suspicions. While it may feel nerve-wracking, it's something you have to do. He likely got wind of something you did in a past relationship that rattled him up.

20. He prefers keeping things professional

Workplace romance happens all the time among colleagues. Several people have met their better halves at work settings. You and a coworker may have been flirting with each other for a while. That doesn't necessarily mean he is interested in sleeping with you or taking things to the next level. Chances are, he is just fooling around and wants things to remain professional between you two.

21. Poor hygiene on your part

You don't take proper care of yourself, and he has noticed it. It's common knowledge that ladies with poor hygiene easily spread germs and infections. No guy wants to contract any sexually transmitted infection regardless of how much he loves you. If you want to see a change in his behavior towards you, cultivate a good hygiene culture.

22. You don't accord him enough respect

No matter the form it takes, disrespect can breed anger and resentment. You cannot overemphasize the importance of respect in relationships. If your significant other does not feel well-respected, appreciated, or seen in the relationship, he won't give you his attention.

23. He doesn't trust you

He doesn't trust you

It isn't easy to trust someone you don't know. You don't expect anybody to give themselves to a person they hardly know. Not all guys have a crazy sex life; some prefer to build a romantic connection before forging ahead. Instead of pressuring him to change his mind, allow him to get to know you.

25. He has other options on the side

You don't expect any guy to take you seriously if he has other options waiting on the side. If he has some connection with them, he may regard them more highly than you. If a guy doesn't want to sleep with you, check if he has options on the side. If he does, kindly walk away and find someone who will value you for who you are.

26. He's yet to get over his ex

If your man doesn't want to get intimate with you, chances are he is still in love with his ex. Like girls, guys can be emotionally unavailable. Deep down all the masculinity, he's still reeling over the loss of his ex. It may take some time for him to heal and give you the attention you desire.

FAQs 

What does it mean when a man doesn't want to sleep with you?

There are a thousand and one reasons why a guy may not want to sleep with you. He probably regards and values your relationship so much that he feels sleeping with you may ruin it. On second thought, the guy may be looking to strengthen the emotional bond between you two before consenting to sex.

How do you tell if a guy doesn't just want to sleep with you?

You'd be lucky to meet a guy who sees you as something more than a booty call. One way to tell is by observing the guy's body language. Additionally, such a guy will always want to engage you in a stimulating conversation. If you are observant enough, you will notice how much he compliments your intelligence and values more than your looks.

What are the signs when a man is not interested in you?

He may not say so face to face, but his body language can never lie. Firstly, the guy will gradually cease all forms of communication with you. You will also notice a significant decrease in the time you guys spend together. Some guys even go as far as flirting with other women in your presence to piss you off.

What does it mean when a guy wants to wait to sleep with you?

Nine times out of ten, he's trying to be sure, so he doesn't regret his actions. He's likely not ready to commit to you yet, so he prefers to hold off any sexual relations. Another reason could be that he wants to know you in a more intimate way that transcends sex.

Can a relationship survive a lack of intimacy?

Intimacy is an essential component of any romantic relationship. Lack of it can pose some serious problems for the couple. With time, both partners will find it difficult to feel secure, ultimately leading to frustration and resentment. Intimacy serves as a subtle way of developing strong emotional bonds and reassuring each other that you are not alone.

In Conclusion

Now you probably know when a guy doesn't want to sleep with you. You can always go over the list from time to time to set your mind at ease and plan your next course of action. Please share your thoughts with us by leaving a comment below. Kindly hit the share button before exiting this page.

You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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