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Adult Nursing Relationship (ANR): A Guide to Erotic Lactation

February 9, 2024

An adult nursing relationship can also be known as erotic lactation or adult suckling.1 You may be surprised to learn that breastfeeding fetishes are common and if this is something that you and your partner are considering exploring then you are certainly not alone. 

There are two types of ANR relationships – breastfeeding from your partner or watching your partner lactate for pleasure. 

It also doesn’t always have to be sexual. 

You may choose to enter an adult nursing relationship for a number of reasons; the many health benefits, to satisfy your partner, to feel nurtured or comforted and, of course, for sexual pleasure.

Before entering an ANR relationship it’s important to do your research, understand the benefits or harms from adult breastfeeding and learn how to prepare for adult nursing. 

Key Takeaways 

  • Adult nursing is not to be confused with infantilism or age play.
  • There can be both benefits and harms to adult breastfeeding.
  • Take caution when purchasing breast milk online.
  • You don’t have to have had a baby to induce milk production.

What Is Adult Nursing Relationship? Understanding the Breastfeeding Fetish

Adult nursing relationships (ANR) will consist of two consenting partners, where the woman will breastfeed her man.

If this is for sexual pleasure, then the couple will experience sexual fulfillment during the act of nursing. If not, they may simply feel comforted or taken care of. It’s important to acknowledge that a woman doesn’t have to have had a baby in order to lactate; there are many ways to induce lactation.

An ANR relationship is not to be confused with infantilism or age play.1 It is simply stimulation through breastfeeding, whether it’s sexual or non sexual. 

1 in 3 men have fantasized about breastfeeding from their partner,1 yet it is a fetish commonly misunderstood. The first step to understanding adult nursing relationships is to begin to understand breastfeeding in itself. 

Breastfeeding is a beautiful gift that empowers women and helps to establish gender equality.4 Although many women opt for formula over breastfeeding, there’s no denying how amazing it feels to be able to provide your baby with exactly what it needs from your own body. 

With that being said, there are many reasons why a woman might choose not to breastfeed, whether it’s a simple preference, health reasons, discomfort, or a lifestyle choice; if your partner isn’t willing to breastfeed you then there are certainly other options, but we’ll get to that later. 

Adult breastfeeding isn’t often spoken about and is still considered taboo. This is mainly because people have the view that you are taking something that is typically mother and child and sexualizing it. 

This is not the case and this is why it’s super important to separate infantilism and age play. Adult breastfeeding has no correlation with the desire to be treated like a baby; this is a whole other topic in itself. 

Typically speaking, heterosexual men love breasts, and suckling on a lactating woman is an extension of being turned on by her breasts alone. There’s also the element of comfort provided by the feeling of being nurtured by your partner, plus the many benefits to be had from breast milk. 

Adult breastfeeding wasn’t always considered taboo, mythological stories show that adult consumption of breast milk in ancient Rome was viewed as something amazing.3

In fact, according to Tara Mulder, “literary sources show that attitudes towards adult breastfeeding were similar to attitudes towards women nursing their own children—a practice that was thought to display familial piety.”

Are There Any Benefits or Harms of Being in an Adult Nursing Relationship?

We know that there are many benefits to breastfeeding a child, and some research suggests that these same benefits apply to adults, such as boosted immunity, stress relief, release of oxytocin (inducing sexual arousal), and fewer infections.1

If you’re into nipple stimulation, then consider an ANR relationship an extension of this desire; this is one of the main factors that cause sexual drive when it comes to breastfeeding your partner.

It goes without saying that if you experience sexual gratification when breastfeeding your partner that this doesn’t apply when breastfeeding a child. The two are completely separate and should in no way be compared.

For a woman, the benefits of breastfeeding regularly (outside of sexual stimulation) is to help balance uneven breasts, to nurture their loved one, and help continue lactation. 

When you stop producing milk, it will dry up after a couple of weeks. Pumping or breastfeeding every 2-3 hours will help to maintain milk supply without causing your breasts to become uncomfortably full.6

A YouTube Channel 4 documentary looks into the online selling of breastmilk.2 The couple sell to bodybuilders, those with medical conditions and fetishists, demonstrating that there are many reasons why someone might be interested in consuming breast milk.

For fetishists who don’t have a partner lactating or a willing partner, this is a great way of fulfilling those desires or even taking baby steps into the stages of an ANR relationship. 

However, It’s always important to be cautious when purchasing breast milk online by making sure that you’re using a reliable source. Infection can pass through breast milk, both diseases and STIs. Of course, if you’re breastfeeding directly from your partner you should be fully aware of their sexual history.

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Outside of transmitting infections, most harms of adult breastfeeding are in fact to the woman. Common breastfeeding problems (according to the NHS website)7 are:

  • Sore or cracked nipples
  • Not enough breast milk production
  • Breast engorgement
  • Too much breast milk production
  • Thrush
  • Blocked milk ducts
  • Mastitis

How to Prepare for Breastfeeding Your Partner

So, if you’re interested in exploring adult breastfeeding but you’re not too sure where to start, there are lots of ways for you and your partner to prepare.

1. Be honest and open with your partner 

be honest and open with your partner

Sharing your desires, sexual or non-sexual, can often feel intimidating, even in a long-term relationship. 

The best way to approach any situation is with complete honesty and clarity. You might find that your partner too has been having these desires; if so, you’re on to a great start. 

If your partner isn’t willing, you may find other ways to satisfy your needs such as purchasing breast milk online, role play, watching porn or slowly introducing your partner to an ANR relationship so that they can gain a better understanding before they commit to experimentation.

2. Think about what you want to get out of an ANR

Going into it with complete clarity of both yours and your partner's goals will help you to comfortably experience adult breastfeeding without any miscommunication or misunderstandings.

3. Research 

When trying anything new, especially sexually, it’s important to do thorough research first. You want to know exactly what you’re getting yourself into and you want to be aware of any health factors to consider.

4. Connect with ANR couples online 

The best way to get a clear understanding of the dynamics of an ANR relationship is to connect with couples online with experience. 

This will give you the opportunity to seek advice, gain clarification and may even result in you learning great tips on things you hadn’t considered prior to that.

5. Consider pumping 

 consider pumping 

If you’re into the idea of your man consuming your breast milk but aren’t quite wanting him to get this directly from your breast, you can consider pumping and get creative with the ways in which your partner consumes your breast milk. 

You can use a breast pump or do this by hand, whatever is more comfortable for you.

6. Create a schedule

Creating a schedule will help you for a few reasons. Mainly to make sure that your milk production is regular, but also to add an extra element of comfort for both you and your partner. 

If you’re looking to achieve sexual stimulation it can also be a great way to ensure that you have this alone time together; there’s nothing worse than not being able to make time for your sexual desires.

7. Set the mood

Setting the mood will help you to achieve your goals, both sexual and non-sexual. 

Little touches like lighting a candle can make a world of difference.

8. Get comfortable

The number one priority is to make sure that you’re comfortable. Use pillows to support your back, get into a comfortable position for both you and your partner and this will allow you to nurture him the way you desire to.

9. Consider how to induce lactation 

If you’re not already lactating there are many ways to induce lactation. Do your research and speak to a professional in order to get the best tips to do so. 

In the next section of this article, you’ll see my 4 best tips for inducing lactation for your partner.

10. Listen to your body

Most importantly, listen to your body. 

If you’re not comfortable or are experiencing pain then you know it’s time to stop and to seek professional advice

Don’t worry, as there are many ways to still experience the benefits of an adult nursing relationship without having to actually breastfeed your man such as engaging in role-play or via porn. 

If you can’t lactate but both partners wish to engage in an ANR, a solution could be to purchase breast milk online, place the breast milk on your nipple and have your partner suckle. You could also hire a lactation escort.1

4 Tips for Inducing Lactation for Your Partner

Many LGBTQ+ relationships, adoptive parents and intended parents (through surrogacy) opt for breastfeeding or chestfeeding without giving birth for attachment reasons, sharing the caregiving role, and for nutritional purposes.6

Whether you’re already lactating and are looking for tips to maintain regular lactation or whether you’re inducing lactation without giving birth, there are many ways to achieve this.

1. Start pumping 

Breastfeeding, pumping or hand expression is the best way to begin to induce lactation.6

The amount of milk production generally varies. If you do in fact produce no milk there are other ways to achieve this stimulation.

2. Consider taking hormone pills 

consider taking hormone pills 

During pregnancy, hormones fluctuate massively, causing changes in a woman’s body in order to prepare for a baby. 

Prolactin is a hormone released that essentially helps a woman’s breasts to make breast milk. Similarly, you can take specific hormones that help you to produce breast milk without having birthed a child.

Consulting a lactation professional will help to provide further insight into exactly what hormones are required in order to induce lactation.

3. Take specific supplements

There are specific supplements to help increase lactation, called galactagogues. Some foods considered to be galactagogues are dark leafy greens, fennel, garlic, and whole grains. 

According to News Medical, “Some of the herbs that may induce lactation include Blessed Thistle herb (recommended 390 mg per capsule) and Fenugreek seed (recommended 610 mg per capsule).”

4. Continue to produce milk

Most importantly, once you’ve induced lactation it’s crucial to continue to produce milk otherwise you’re at risk of your milk drying up. 

Remain consistent with your breastfeeding or pumping and you will avoid this problem and get yourself into a routine for lactation.

Caution: When Not to Breastfeed Your Partner

It’s important to be aware of when not to breastfeed.

  • If one, or both of you has an infection, you could risk giving it to each other through breast milk.
  • It’s also advised against breastfeeding if you have breast cancer, as many of the treatments can be passed through breast milk causing harm to the consumer. 
  • If you struggle with milk supply (or oversupply) and are nursing a baby, the baby must be a priority.
  • If you’re pregnant and high-risk.

There can be a number of reasons when not to breastfeed your partner. If ever unsure, seek professional advice.

If you aren’t able to breastfeed your partner and opt for purchasing breast milk online, always look for a reliable source and take caution. 

Some risks with purchasing breast milk online are that it exposes consumers to food-borne illnesses, bacteria can be found (especially if there’s a failure to sanitize or due to prolonged storage through importation) and you may be exposed to infectious diseases.7

FAQs

Where can I go to find a breastfeeding partner? 

If you are single but are looking to enter an ANR relationship, or are even looking for a breastfeeding partner to fulfill your desires, then there are many places to look. 

Firstly, you can find online fetish groups that can help you to meet people who share similar desires. Not only might you find a partner, but you will find others who can advise you and lead you in the right direction.

You can even find ANR dating sites, hire a lactation escort or fulfill your desires via online webcam services.

What does ANR mean sexually?

As stated, an adult nursing relationship doesn’t always have to be sexual and can even be beneficial to those seeking comfort or looking to get closer with their partner. 

In a strictly sexual sense, an ANR relationship is where both partners will engage in breastfeeding for an erotic or sexual fulfillment. This can be done so via role play, enhanced nipple play and simply being turned on by consuming your partner’s breast milk. 

Some ANR relationships will have aspects of both, finding both sexual fulfillment and comfort from the relationship dynamic. 

Conclusion

Making the decision to enter an adult breastfeeding relationship could do wonders for your relationship. 

Whether you’re lactating from giving birth or inducing lactation there are many ways to ensure that you lactate consistently; creating a schedule will be beneficial for both you and your sexual partner and might just be the answer if you’re looking to dedicate time to your sex lives.

Remember that your health is the utmost priority and if something doesn’t feel comfortable or right then it’s best to stop and to seek further medical advice before continuing to nurse your partner. 

There are many ways to successfully nurse your partner without actually breastfeeding him, so don’t worry if you’re struggling to lactate. Engaging in role play, purchasing breast milk online, hiring a lactation expert or watching porn can be equally as fulfilling and exciting for your and your partner's desires.

It’s always a good idea to seek further knowledge and do your research. Even talking to couples in adult nursing relationships can be very insightful and beneficial as well as speaking to a health professional.

If you have any further advice for those seeking an ANR relationship then please feel free to comment. As always, share with a friend in need. 

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8 Sources:
  1. Everything You Need to Know About Adult Breastfeeding, Sofia Gray (2023). Youtube Video, Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu-mrlRdgKI
  2. I Sell My Breastmilk Online | Secret Services | Channel 4 Documentaries (2022). Youtube Video, Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URV7vM2vQbo
  3. Adult Breastfeeding in Ancient Rome (2017). Tara Mulder. Illinois Classical Studies.
  4. Research Article, Link:https://scholarlypublishingcollective.org/uip/ics/article-abstract/42/1/227/234141/Adult-Breastfeeding-in-Ancient-Rome
  5. Breastfeeding and Feminism (1994). P. Van Esterik. International Journal of Gynecology & Obstetrics. Science Direct Journals, Link:https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/002072929402233O
  6. More than a lucrative liquid: the risks for adult consumers of human breast milk bought from the online (2015). Sarah Steele, Jens Foell, Jeanine Martyn, Andreas Freitag. Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine, Link:https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0141076815588539
  7. Breastfeeding Without Giving Birth (2020). Alyssa Schnell. La Leche League International. Link:https://llli.org/breastfeeding-without-giving-birth-2/#:~:text=As%20stated%20above%2C%20the%20primary,support%20the%20production%20of%20milk
  8. Common Breastfeeding Problems (2022). NHS Staff. Link: https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/breastfeeding-and-bottle-feeding/breastfeeding-problems/common-problems/
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