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What Does Taking It Slow Mean To A Guy (21 Possible Meanings)

February 4, 2023

Has a man told you he wants to ‘take things slow’?

Are you wondering what this even means to him - or why he’d say it?

If so, this is the article for you. I’m going to take you through all the possible explanations in the guide below. 

But first, how about I teach you how to stop guys from spewing all this non-committal BS to you ? 

Men used to make stupid excuses like this to me all the time. 

I was the woman who everyone wanted to sleep with, but no-one wanted to commit to!

Worse yet, I had no idea why! I wasn’t a bad woman, nor a cheap hussy!

Luckily, I managed to turn this problem around when I began learning about a powerful aspect of male psychology called the ‘Hero’s Instinct’

This is the part of male thinking that makes them want to love and cherish the women in their life.

And you can learn to trigger it on demand!

When you do, his feelings for you can become so strong that they border on OBSESSION. 

I know because that’s what I’ve been doing for a few years now! This psychological routine transformed my love life and it can do the same for you.

To learn more take a look at the detailed story of how I discovered the magic of the ‘Hero’s Instinct’.

This story can help you turn things around with the guy who is being wishy-washy about being in a relationship with you - and I’d encourage you to make that happen. 

With that said, let’s explore further into the reasons why a man might say he wants to take things slow.

21 Possible Meanings Of Taking It Slow

1. He wants to take his time

If anyone suggests taking things slow, the primary reason for this decision is to take their time with something. Similarly, when a man decides that he wants the relationship to go slower, it merely means that he wants to take his time with you. This decision could be based on several other reasons but doesn't put his commitment up for questioning. 

If a partner is concerned about his association with you, it means he cares about you, which is a positive sign. Your next step should be to find out his grounds for the decision and see if you can contribute to his cause in any way.

2. He's afraid he can't meet your needs

he's afraid he can't meet your needs

Most guys desperately want to see their partners happy. They want to satisfy their significant other's needs and feel fulfilled in their relationships. Anything that makes them feel incompetent will undoubtedly make them step back and strategize. The reality is if a man is talking about taking things slow, it could be because he thinks he can't fulfill your desires at the moment. 

He's afraid that the association will meet a sudden halt if he doesn't slow down its pace and figure out how to make you happy. He wants you as his partner to be entirely comfortable with him, and therefore, tries to fix the association's lack.

3. He wants to build the relationship first

Many guys would prefer to form a reliable connection with a lady before taking things further. If a guy thinks emotional intimacy is a priority, he would request to take things slowly. A partner would want to take dating slowly if he wants the association to be grounded before it gets serious. 

This decision is to guarantee that both parties can handle the tough times when they come. If the association isn't firm, there's a likelihood that its span may not be as long as expected. He will strive to build a good foundation to ensure the association doesn't end like any past relationship.

4. He's respecting her boundaries

Sometimes, guys can tell when they're overly demanding to a lady. If he thinks he's pushing her out of her comfort zone too much, he will suggest taking things slow. This scenario means that he could recommend taking things slowly as a way to remind himself to be patient with his significant other. 

He has perceived that this action will make the relationship blossom naturally and make his girl comfortable with him. Therefore, he suggests taking things slow to help sustain harmony in the association. This suggestion doesn't diminish his commitment to the association but reveals how willing he is to make things work.

5. She reminds him of his ex

If a guy's new partner makes him recollect previous events from his past, especially with an ex, he would prefer to slow down things for a while. Even if he is head over heels with you, he wants his new relationship to be different and unique, which is why he wants to focus on the essential parts of the association. 

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him.

Take this quick quiz to see if he actually likes you!

He would concentrate on how the two of you can get to know each other better and build the feelings you have for one another, rather than getting carried away with the excitement of a fresh relationship. He doesn't want to be reminded about his ex but wants to start afresh on a new platter.

6. He wants to make every date exciting

he wants to make every date exciting

People feel they might kill the excitement of a new relationship when they rush experiences. If both parties do activities far too often, they may become routines that they take for granted later on. Therefore, a guy might suggest taking things slow to keep every occasion fresh and exciting. 

He would preferably plan fantastic date nights every weekend than go out with you every night. This action is to prevent both of you from getting accustomed to the excitement each outing brings. Taking things slow would also mean holding off on some activities while dating to build up the exhilaration.

7. He cherishes friendships

Many people look for deeper meanings in their relationships. A guy may want a partner and a companion while dating because his thoughts tell him it would make the association more genuine. Thus, he would focus more on building a connection and developing a friendship than merely starting the relationship. 

If he suggests that he wants to take it slow, it could mean that he wants you to be his companion first to guarantee a long-lasting association. He wants to know you intimately because he thinks it will help him be a better man for you. In other words, he cares about you and doesn't want to lose you to anything.

8. He is afraid of letting his guard down

The turmoil of the past can sometimes prevent people from opening up or moving on. If a person were hurt before, they'd think that others might do the same thing and prefer to seclude their emotions. A partner may decide to take things at a slow pace because he's afraid of being vulnerable in the relationship. 

If you sense he's not letting his guard down, you should give him space to get accustomed to you. Putting pressure on him would only push him further away, so it's crucial to make him see comfort in your presence. He'll warm up to you eventually with that.

9. He is dealing with personal issues

When a problem arises, a person might find it challenging to cope with other areas of their life, especially their relationships. If your partner wants to take things tardily in the association, it may be because he's having a tough time. He knows he won't satisfy your desires at that moment, so he takes some time off to settle his issues

He would preferably slow down the association until he gets back on track, rather than choose to leave you wondering. Bear in mind that giving your man space when he's going through a lot is prudent if you can't actively resolve the situation. He'll appreciate it more than you know.

10. He's trying not to let her down

People naturally seek to impress the ones they love by striving to be their best and meet their beloved's desires. If a person thinks that certain things may prevent him from having a cooperative association with his significant other, he might want to take the association slower. This scenario is similar to every guy in a serious relationship. 

He doesn't want to let his partner down with his inefficiencies. If he feels the association isn't ready for a new stage, he will take it easy and get to know his significant other's feelings to make the association stronger.

11. He doesn't want her to lose interest

he doesn't want her to lose interest

Most guys feel if they rush a relationship, their significant other might lose interest quickly. The lady might get familiar or bored with most of the activities, and the association will start to decline. Therefore, a guy might decide to take things slow to keep a lady engaged for as long as possible and make sure such a problem doesn't occur.

He would preferably focus on intimacy and building a strong commitment to each other before focusing on other areas. Some guys might even decide to hold off on sex to get to know their significant other more.

12. He wants to maintain other friendships

When people start dating, it's easy for them to become so engrossed in their relationship that they neglect other associations. Thus, a guy may decide to slow down his romantic association's pace to balance out his friendships with other people. 

He doesn't want both of you to become so preoccupied with each other that you lose out on other healthy associations that could benefit the two of you in the long run. These associations could be business or career-related, or merely just friendship you wouldn't want to lose. It's a decision that may prove to be worthwhile in the end.

13. He's trying to avoid previous mistakes

People that had challenges in a past relationship may seek to prevent such problems from reoccurring in a new association. They would want to take things slow to ensure that whatever affected them the last time doesn't stir up again. 

This action is one of the ways to know when someone is really interested in you. If they're trying their best to avoid the association from falling apart, it reveals how much they love you. Thus, choosing to build the association steadily isn't a call for alarm but guarantees a longer span.

14. He needs space to himself

The thing about men is that they unconsciously need space even while in a relationship. It's a natural reaction to hold on to their sense of individuality. The downside of this scenario is that women perceive it differently. When a guy says he needs to take things slowly, they automatically assume the worst when the situation may be far from being terrible. 

He may want to take it slow to clear his head and evaluate his emotions towards you, which is a fantastic thing because it ends up bringing you closer to him than ever before. Therefore, it's essential not to worry when a partner needs space.

15. He needs a while to adjust

There are many reasons why people need time to adapt to a fresh relationship. They may be trying to get over their last association or aren't too familiar with the dating scene. They would want to take things tardily in such a situation while getting to know you as a partner. The more comfortable both of you can get with each other, the better he can adapt to the new association. It's crucial to understand that respecting a person's desire to move slower when they're finding it hard to adjust rather than pressuring them will be a prudent decision for a long and profitable association.

16. He wants to focus on self-development

he wants to focus on self-development

A person may decide to build their relationship slowly because they want to develop themselves in the meantime. Tending to personal flaws guarantees a profitable connection with a partner and is crucial to the development of the association. If someone is trying to be better for their significant other, they might request some space to work on themselves. 

This act also reveals how significant the association is to them, making the need for space an expression of love. Neglecting their inefficiencies would only cause a rift in the association in the long run, which is why any guy would be keen on self-development.

17. He doesn't want to make contact all the time

When strangers start dating, they are likely to have regular contact to build the association. If a person has any reason to limit the amount of communication made, they may request to move things at a slow pace. 

Some of the possible things that could hinder constant involvement include a demanding job or life challenges that need absolute attention. If they can't call or text you as much as their significant other would love while dating, they would prefer to grow the association steadily until they have time for the relationship.

18. He wants to measure compatibility

Any guy that wants a serious relationship would do everything to find a partner he matches with, including taking time with every association. Thus, if a guy wants to take things steadily, it may be because he's trying to determine whether both of you are compatible. 

He doesn't want to rush the association because he knows he's looking for something serious. He would choose to focus on getting to know you as a person than having sex right away.

19. He has other commitments

he has other commitments

One thing that can push a man to take things slow in his relationship is his dedication to other aspects of life. If a man's job or career is demanding, he will undoubtedly have limited time to cater to his romantic association's needs. 

Similarly, other factors, like catering to his family needs or pursuing one's goals or dreams, can prevent a man from being actively involved in an association. He would request some space to handle these areas of his life before focusing entirely on his significant other feelings.

20. He wants to fix some problems in the relationship

All associations have their challenges and getting to know the cause of the conflict is the first step to solving it. Your partner may want to take things at a slow rate because he wants both of you to work on your differences. Gliding over challenges only causes more rifts in the future, which is why it's always best to settle conflicts as soon as they arise. 

If anything needs to be worked on in the association, focusing on those aspects above anything else is prudent. This action is better than neglecting discordances until they become unresolvable.

21. He only wants to take it slow

People naturally have preferences when it comes to relationships. They feel certain circumstances would be better for the association than others. This notion could stir up from past experiences or personal beliefs. 

Some of these scenarios include taking things slow. If a guy decides to focus more on building a connection in his relationship than anything else, it may be because he believes it would work best. Therefore, it's pertinent to note that sometimes, guys have no deliberate intention to grow an association at a steady pace. It could be his preference for the situation.


What does it mean to take things slow in a relationship?

Going slow in a relationship could mean several different things. It could be an avenue to focus on the critical aspects of the relationship or fix specific association challenges. It could also be a way to focus on individual priorities before being fully immersed in a romantic association.

How do you tell if a guy is taking it slow or not interested?

If a guy still shows interest in you after requesting for a slower rate of events, then he's not playing games with you. His dedication to the association will prove that he indeed wants to make the relationship work. On the contrary, inconsistencies in a guy's affection towards you when dating is a red flag.

What does a guy mean when he says he wants to take it slow but you already slept together?

If a guy demands things to go slow after you've already had sex with him, there's a chance that he wants a casual association with you and not a serious one. Relationships get severe after sexual intercourse, so he might discourage a romantic association from happening.

What does taking it slow mean to a girl?

Girls that take relationships seriously may decide to go slow if an association tends to be long-term. They would preferably focus on the critical aspects of the association first to avoid getting heartbreak. A girl would do this if she considers dating as a thing of precaution. 

How do you know if he is serious about you?

It's easy to tell when relationships are getting severe by the parties' dedication to making things work. If a guy would do anything to keep you as his partner, including fixing all differences and trying to be a better person for you, then it's a profound association.

In Summary

Did you enjoy this article about what going slow means to a guy? It's crucial to find out why your significant other wants to go slow so that both of you can work together to achieve that goal. If he doesn't reveal it to you, it's up to you to respect his wishes. Kindly leave a comment below and share this article if you liked it.

Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. You have to understand how he is wired. Once you do, you'll find there is a subtle thing you can say that to him that will drastically change how he shows his emotions towards you.

Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not!


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