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9 Signs A Cancer Man Is Playing You (Look Out)

Last updated on June 7, 2022 by Sonya Schwartz

Are you worried that a Cancer man is playing you?

Perhaps you’re getting a sneaking suspicion that he is being deceitful, even though everything might seem fine on the surface?

If so, you’re in the right place. This guide explains the telltale signs that a Cancer is messing you around. 

However, before we reveal these signs, it’s important you read the following sentences carefully. 

Recently, I discovered a little-known aspect of male psychology, which has a significant effect on how men perceive their romantic partners. 

It’s called the Hero’s Instinct - and it appears to be held by most men. 

When this line of thinking is activated, men will often experience intense feelings of power, purpose, and self-esteem. Naturally, they feel closer to the women who can make them feel this way. 

Once I learned how to trigger a man’s Hero’s Instinct, my relationships became deeper, more loving, and more passionate. There was no need to worry about my men playing around (read my personal story to learn more). 

This skill is pretty simple to learn, yet so few people seem to even be aware of its existence. 

Still, if you’re tired of being in relationships with men who don’t seem serious about you, I’d urge you to learn more about how I discovered the power of the ‘Hero’s Instinct’. 

The guide below will help you realize if you should be worried about the behavior of your Cancer man. 

What Are The Signs A Cancer Man Is Playing You?

1. He’s Checking His Phone All The Time.

A Cancer man is someone who, if he wants to know you better will give you 100% of his attention whenever you see each other. If he’s just playing you and doesn’t want to take your casual dating situation into a serious relationship, you should look out for him checking his phone all the time when he is with you.

Because a Cancer man can be incredibly intense, keeping an eye out for times when he does not dedicate his entire concentration on you can be a big hint that he’s just not that into you. You want to see your

Cancerian man leaving distractions like his phone in his pocket, or not talking to people over Whatsapp or on FaceTime when he’s with you. 

The reason being is that if he does want to take things further with you, he will want to make the most of the one on one time he has with you. He won’t want to waste it on his phone. 

2. He Is Very Elusive.

There is nothing more annoying than someone who is difficult to contact or is evasive with you when making plans. It’s also one of the signs that you should be very aware of if you are dating a Cancer man. 

Given their intense nature, if they want to do something, they are forthcoming in making plans to do it. If that means that they want to see you, they will move heaven and earth to do so. 

If he is evasive and never answers your questions about meeting up directly, then this is a big indication that he is simply playing you and doesn’t see your relationship going anywhere. This can be disheartening especially when you feel like you had a connection. 

If you feel this is the case, do try to talk to him about his elusive tactics to give him the opportunity to explain himself - even if it is so you can find out his true feelings towards you. It means you can draw a line underneath the relationship quickly if you need to. 

3. He Makes Plans Then Cancels Them.

It can be very confusing when dating a Cancer man if he makes plans with you and then cancels them. The reason being is that by making plans with you he is making you feel like he wants to see you. When he cancels them, you’ll be disappointed but at least you will feel that he is at least a little interested to even try to make those plans with you in the first plans.

Sadly, making plans and canceling on you at the last minute is one of a Cancer man’s tactics to play you. As said before, he is someone who is very intense and motivated. The result is that if he wants to see you, he will see you. He will not cancel plans with you unless he has a good reason.

He may well appear to be canceling plans with you for good reason, which can add to the confusion that you are feeling. However, simply be aware that if he keeps canceling on you, despite having a supposed good reason, he could simply be lying to you to save your feelings. 

It may, therefore, be a good idea to ask him directly when you have had enough of his cancellations whether he is serious about taking things forward with you or not. 

4. He Never Asks You To Meet His Friends.

Cancer men have a small group of really close friends that they love to spend time with. As a result, if he is into the girl he is dating, a Cancer man will want the girl to meet his friends so he can get their opinions. If you get on with them, it can make or break how he views your future together.

Is it like pulling teeth getting him to spend time with you?
The key to solving is understanding men on a much deeper emotional level. The number #1 factor that causes men to behave this way is actually relatively easy to change with a few subtle things you can say to him.

Take this quick quiz to see if he actually likes you!

Bearing that in mind, if your Cancer man is constantly making plans with his mates, but he never asks you along, then this can be a sign he is playing you. A Cancer man not only wants buy-in from his friends, but he also wants to spend as much time with the girl he is into as possible.

The result is, if he is dating you, but doesn’t see a future with you, then he won’t ask you along to drinks with his friends or parties with his mates. 

5. He Never Stays Over At Yours.

This is a massive warning sign that the Cancer man that you are dating just isn’t into you for a serious partnership. Instead, if he never stays at yours, he is most likely a Cancer man that is just using you for a casual relationship. 

A Cancer man is a sensitive soul so he will take sleeping over at yours as a way to be closer to you and to make the most of your time together. He will enjoy the closeness that staying in your bed will bring - whether you have had sex or not. 

He is an incredibly sensual person thanks to being so sensitive and intense. As a result, staying over at yours will be a natural action for him, if he not playing you. 

6. He Doesn’t Want You To Stay The Night.

6. He Doesn’t Want You To Stay The Night.

A direct extension of not wanting to stay over at yours is also never asking you to stay the night at his. This could be before or after you have fooled around, but either way, if he doesn’t ask you to stay, you need to be aware of the chance that he’s playing you.

He will no doubt make a reasonable excuse as to why he doesn’t want you to stay. Cancer men are incredibly charming after all. But of all the zodiac signs, if he doesn’t want you to sleep with him then you are most likely with a man who is playing you. 

7. He Doesn’t Kiss You In Public.

One of the nicest things about being in a serious and dedicated relationship is the affection you give and get from your partner. For a Cancerian in a relationship, affection is essential. 

Therefore, if your guy doesn’t hold your hand, put his arm around you or kiss you in public, then it is likely that he is just playing you. If he sees a future with you he will want to show the world that you are his girlfriend. If he doesn’t care about taking your relationship further, he won’t want to kiss you in public as he will be wanting to keep his options open. 

8. He Makes Excuses.

A Cancer man may call you or contact you with the most legitimate of excuses regarding his behavior. But if he is doing this repeatedly - either for canceling on you, not showing up to events with you, not asking you to stay with him or anything else where he makes an excuse for his actions be on your guard that he is playing you. 

A Cancer man is someone who knows what he wants and will stop at nothing to get it. If you are the something that he wants, he will not need to make excuses for less than gentlemanly behavior. Instead, he will be a courteous, chivalrous boyfriend that supports you as and when you need it.

9. He Flirts With Other Women.

While flirting with other women is often a sign that something is not right in any relationship, it is particularly important to keep an eye out for if your Cancer man is doing it. As a sensitive and loyal person, but only to those that he respects, if he is playing you, he will happily flirt with other females in his eye line. 

This behavior is hurtful and disrespectful to you. If you don’t like it, it will probably help you both in the future if you speak to him about it and how it upsets you. If he wants you to stick around, he should change his actions immediately. 

The Bottom Line

Learning how to know whether a Cancer man is playing you or not is a good idea if you are not sure about whether the relationship will get serious or not. While asking a Cancer man directly is the quickest way to find out whether he is into you or not, reading his body language and actions towards you can also be enlightening. Plus sometimes, it is hard to ask the guy you like whether they see a future with you. The fear of rejection can be too great. 

Either way, having your wits about you as to when your Cancer man needs something or someone else can save you a lot of heartache. Staying with a Cancer man or continuing to date him in a casual manner can be a mistake if you are hoping that he ends up falling in love with you. 

The fact is that a Cancer man is likely to only be interested in women from the start and any romance that stems from there could have a future. If he doesn’t feel a spark or chemistry with you from the beginning, then he is likely just to see you as one of his conquests. 

In Summary

The above signs are good ways to arm yourself against having your emotions hurt and suffering a heartbreak. If you notice any of them, it’s a good idea to try to talk to your man about it, but try not to waste your energy changing his mind about you. He is a stubborn horoscope sign who won’t adjust his behavior in any way. It is perhaps for the best to focus your interests elsewhere. 

Let us know what you think of this article and leave us a comment. 

Do you feel like all you think about is him, but he only thinks about himself?
This doesn't mean he doesn't like you. You have to understand how he is wired. Once you do, you'll find there is a subtle thing you can say that to him that will drastically change how he shows his emotions towards you.

Take this quick quiz that looks at whether he actually likes you or not!

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

4 comments on “9 Signs A Cancer Man Is Playing You (Look Out)”

  1. Hi friends am GIFT and all what I read is not far from true cause Am dating Cancer man, I really appreciate you guys. Thank

  2. I ve knew a cancer man since 5 month ago and we had about 8 dates. he took me with his affection from second date but he never text or call he is strange! he invite me to his home to stay, huge, food speak TV ... Over night to morning but is not texting or commit after that,many times happend then he disappear again same and same with more distance for a months and suddenly call took me to frist place we met as memory then he disappear again, suddenly he come to my home to surprised me hugging me speak stay for long conversation... Aske me to make food for him next time... then when I invite him said OK will arrange closest time but again disappearing . he never like girls photo on Facebook then suddenly in disappearing time for frist time he liked my photo, but no call, no text nothing I am confused that strange nature, any body have experience? My heart has pain I read this article and I don't know I think I must forgot him.

  3. I met a cancer man online. We met up at a park and talked. He was shorter than me but kinda cute, well shaved. He called all the time, said I was his future. Started buying me flowers, perfect gentleman. We had our first eat out date and he pulled my chair out. I was like ookaaay! I’ve been alone for 5 years after a relationship that just broke my heart. I needed time to myself. I isolated myself. Anyway, everything I wanted to do he was down for it. Never said no. Always agreed. I don’t know why I was so skeptical. He was moving so fast with the emotions, always holding my hand, very affectionate. It scared the hell out of me. Was he serious? Within a month he’s talking about marriage. I just wanted him to slow down. Then I started noticing changes. I would break it off with him because he wouldn’t listen to me about the HEAVY PETTING. I felt like that’s all he wanted was my body even though we would hang out. Yes I have issues. I suppressed my feelings for him bcuz it was too soon, I’d been alone so long. He hung up on me one night we were talking on the phone and I just broke up with him. He gets upset when he can’t have his way. Wanted me to come over but after spending so many days with him, I just wanted to be at home and I said some pretty awful things to him. He begged me not to leave him alone. I want my voice heard, my no to register. Anyway, the next day after breaking up he called and even his tone had changed. He asked if I was sure we couldn’t work it out, and I said no. But I felt like I got broke with. Went to his house to give him his keys. No response on the phone or texts. Eventually he came outside bcuz I saw the woman in house. Yes this woman was very...outraged. He called and I was so hurt like you’ve been talking to someone else?! In my gut I knew bcuz he changed. So now? He calls me like we’re still together but says he doesn’t know if he wants to be with me and my heart is broken bcuz I’ve been down this road before. He said some things that hurt and I feel like a fool sometimes that I’m answering his calls and trying to figure what he wants. Like if you don’t want me why do you call like we’re still together. We’ve had sex, which bothers me the next day. He’s back to calling me babe. My days are CONSUMED WITH THINKING ABOUT THIS MAN. I don’t know if I’m in love. I’m scared that he will cheat again(which btw he says wasn’t cheating). Clearly they were talking before I ended it. Do cancer men do this or is it ALL men? He says he will stay with me til I find someone. Says he misses me, still affectionate, but I miss everything else. Yes the flowers, him making plans to be with me. I didn’t realize I had deep feelings for him until I saw the other woman in his place. I told him I won’t be his hoe, his friends with benefits, pillow friend. That’s not what I want. He said he wanted to get married. All that. He was having some sexual issues in the beginning of our intimacy and yes I was frustrated. It’s been five years and you’ve awakened that part of me and can’t satisfy me. BUT at least I know that I wasn’t attracted to him for what he does in the bedroom. I genuinely am crazy for this man. Almost everything I prayed for he is and now...I feel stupid for waiting for him to decide what he wants. How do I get out of this? Or will he come around? I’ve read so many things about how cancer men act when they’ve been hurt. I don’t know what to do. If he’s calling and calling but unsure what does all this mean? I realized I was looking at all his flaws to keep my defenses up to avoid getting hurt again. He doesn’t want to talk about what happened and I have so many questions yet I’m still there. I’m afraid that he will cut me off when he finds someone else bcuz, within 24 hours he had another woman in his house. He did say that he thinks he’s falling in love with me but I was like if you don’t know don’t say it, since we are just sitting down trying to work things out. I dint even know if we’re working things out, but he’s always calling. See how confused I am? I question what I learned the five years I was alone. And was he taking advantage of my vulnerability since he knew how long I’d been alone? I’m going to drink wine now.

    Signed I’m so confused and possibly in love with a man who don’t know if he wants me😩😢

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