HerNorm is a community-supported website. We may earn a small commission on purchases made through our links. Learn more.

How To Stop Being Needy In 2 Easy Steps

by Sonya Schwartz

Have you been told in the past or recently that you are needy? Have past relationships specifically ended because he said you were too needy? If so, keep on reading because I will try to give you some tips on how to stop being needy.

I have actually been told I am needy in the past and can honestly say that I wasn't aware of it until the guy I was dating at the time mentioned it. I didn't want to be that person and so I quickly got to work on stopping this unattractive trait.

I have listed two of the main steps to how I stopped being needy as well as further steps that fall under each of the two main steps.

Finding A Balance

First thing that is important in a relationship is to find a balance where both of you have equal power and are both happy. Relationships that last are those that don't have anyone having to rely or depend on the other. There are a number of different ways on which you can find a better balance in your relationship which can be found below.

Don’t Rush Things

Don’t Rush Things

All relationships grow at their own pace and can be quite slow but still very much exciting. There is never any point in attempting to rush a relationship just because you feel caught up in the moment. All relationships feel amazing during the early stages which is why it is called the honeymoon phase.It is not until the honeymoon phase is over do you really find out whether the relationship can last.

Stop Idolizing Him​

Stop Idolizing Him​

Many women who are needy are women who idolize their men and view them through rose tinted glasses. It is almost as if he can’t do no wrong even when he is doing wrong. A way to stop being needy is to remove your rose tinted glasses and look at your man for what he is and look at how he truly behaves. You will never be able to stop being needy if you don’t realistically look at your man.

Practice Giving A little This For That​

Practice Giving A little This For That​

No successful relationship was built with one person taking and never giving. To find a good balance in the relationship, it is important that you practice giving a little this for that. By this I mean every time you do something, he should return it. For example, text him something nice and sit back and wait till he responds. If you are needy then you may find this hard as people who are needy tend to get anxious and can’t wait so will send another text and another until they respond.​

​Spend Time Away From Him

​Spend Time Away From Him

Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself and your relationship is to spend some time away from your man. If you are needy then you tend to always want to do what your man is doing and spend every minute with him. For the sake of your relationship though, it is important to spend some time doing things that you enjoy too. This could be an hour a day at the gym or once a month going for dinner with the girls. Doing this will stop your man thinking that you depend on him to have fun and will free up the tension in the relationship.

Know When He Isn’t Interested Any More

Know When He Isn’t Interested Any More

When you feel your man is pulling away from you and is being distant, it can be all too easy to shower him with affection to try and win his affection back. To do what is best for you as well as him is to know when he isn’t interested anymore because no matter how much affection you show him, it won’t change his mind.

Respect His Decisions​

Respect His Decisions​

If your man has decided to walk away and move on then the worst thing you can do is to chase him and carry on showering him with affection. To stop being needy, it is important to learn how to respect his decisions and wishes as it doesn’t matter how much you show love for him and chase him, it will not change his mind.

Think About What You Want And If You’re Getting It​

Think About What You Want And If You’re Getting It​

One of the most important things to do to find a good balance in a relationship is to think about whether you’re truly happy and whether you are getting what you want out of it. If you’re needy then you may strive to please your man and make sure he is happy however what about your own happiness? Think about whether your man does in fact make you happy. After stripping everything away, if you find that you aren’t really getting anything from the relationship then it is either time to move on or to sit and talk with your man.​

​Work On Building Your Confidence

As well as finding a balance in the relationship, the other important thing that you need to do is start to work on building your confidence. Many women who are needy are low in confidence for plenty of different reasons. Whatever you feel has caused your confidence to be low, it is time to build it back up.

Improve Your Self Esteem​

Improve Your Self Esteem

One of the reasons why women can be needy is because they feel that a man will make them happy. This couldn’t be any further from the truth. The only person in the world that can make you happy is yourself. You shouldn’t have to depend on a man for happiness and so it is time to start building your self-esteem by taking up new hobbies, going out with friends and doing things you enjoy. Being single can be daunting if you’re needy however it is the best way to break free of it and work on your self-esteem. Once you have built your self-esteem and confidence, it is ok to want a man but you should feel that you need a man.​

How to Finally Fix Your Relationship

Since your relationship is unique, the most important thing is that you use a tailored approach to tackle your relationship issues.

A generic approach with advice you read online can often even make things even worse!

The best way to get this advice is through someone with experience that is able to listen to the issues you are facing in your relationship…

That is why I highly recommend the website Relationship Hero that gives you specialized advice for your relationship.

In fact, a few weeks ago I reached out to them when I was going through an extremely difficult patch in my relationship.

I had hit rock bottom, and couldn’t even turn to my friends for advice anymore.

After speaking to Lucy (my relationship coach at Relationship Hero) and telling her of my desperate situation, she was able to give me some concrete steps to follow over the following days.

I was able to check in with her on a daily basis as I implemented her advice, and she helped me through every step.

Not only was she super helpful and empathetic, she eventually helped me solve some of the issues had been plaguing my relationship for years.

Click here to fix your relationship too!

I can’t thank them enough.

Want him to chase, love and worship you?
Well, you’ll need to have a much deeper understanding of his astrological love profile. My friend and relationship astrologer Anna Kovach prepared this Free Compatibility Quiz to help you discover the secrets of his zodiac sign.

Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.