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53 Irritating Characteristics Of Needy Men In A Relationship

by Sonya Schwartz

Neediness is a major turnoff in any relationship. In recent years, it’s the women that have been attributed to this negative trait, probably because of our love for attention. In reality, men can also be quite clingy. So what is clingy? When dating or in a relationship, a cling guy would depend on you emotionally and be very attached. 

Clingy men don’t want to spend time with others, they prefer sticking to one or more friends, or if they're dating someone, they’ll stick to their party. What does needy mean? Well, a needy personality is very similar to clinginess, it asks for a lot of attention and emotional displays of affection.

Having needs should not be mistaken with being needy, it's normal for anyone to want something out of a relationship, but when that ‘wanting’ becomes unhealthy, insecure, and co-dependent on others it becomes a problem. 

To really understand this personality, let’s discuss their characters and traits.

Contents

53 Traits Of A Needy Man

1. Constantly trying to please you

A clingy guy who likes a woman will stick to her as his life depends on it, he’ll be a bit too accommodating, and do things that inconvenience him just to please others.

2. Always paying you compliments

Women like to be paid compliments, but it can become a bit too much when it’s done every time, especially when we don’t really look our best.  

3. Seems not to have friends

Most women like guys who prefer to stick to one person, which would be their woman of course. However, he should have others to hang out with sometimes. Focusing all his time and energy on the relationship could make things uncomfortable. 

4. Gives ultimatums

When a guy doesn’t have others in his life to keep him company or offer his support, all his attention is mostly on one person. If it’s the woman he’s dating, he may start giving ultimatums in the relationship, just to guilt her into staying with him. 

5. He hardly has alone time

Even women have that time they set apart to go out with their friends, and generally spend time with others. If the guy you’re dating only wants to hang out and do things with you, he’ll have time for himself. 

6. He doesn’t let you have alone time

If a guy insists on spending every waking hour with you then he’s probably clingy. The same way he doesn’t take time out to hang with friends, he doesn’t want you to relate with others as well. 

7. He doesn’t take things slow

A clingy guy feels the need to rush through stages, he wants to get to the part where you both spend your lives together, and he mines that literally. When dating, they’ll push for a more serious relationship, they are the kind to propose just after dating you for one or two months.

8. He’s always calling

Every woman appreciates a man who checks up on her during the day, but when he’s calling you at every opportunity he gets, it's not so attractive anymore. 

9. He’s always texting

If a needy man isn't constantly calling you or leaving voice notes all day, he’s probably constantly texting you. Some even break the unspoken rule of not texting the moment they get your number.

10. He gets angry or nervous when you don’t pick up

If calling and texting a million times isn't enough, most times clingy guys would get frustrated and angry when you don’t pick up or respond. They’d sometimes even send text messages or try to call to find out if it was something they did. 

11. Respond speedily to calls and messages

Clingy guys may appear really desperate in the relationship. He may even seem like he’s constantly sitting by his phone waiting for it to ring. He may not do this with others, but he’s really hung on you.

12. He’s constantly liking your photos on social media

If he followed you on all your social media platforms the same day you both met and he seems to have liked every last photo on your page, then he’s probably a needy guy.

13. He stalks you on social media

For some reason, he seems to be so up-to-date with all your posts both old and recent. He’s always the first to like and comment on your posts. He also seems to know every change you’ve made to your profile.  

14. He’s constantly sending you DMs 

He’s constantly sending you DMs

If he’s generally too active on your social media pages, this is not a good sign. If every time you have a message in your inbox it’s his, then I’m afraid your man may just be a little too clingy. 

15. He’s constantly seeking your approval

You know he’s needy if he constantly shape-shifts into what he thinks you like. He craves your approval on almost everything so he’s too afraid to have a mind of his own. He also tells you only what you want to hear. 

16. He constantly seeks your attention

He’s constantly seeking attention from you. Positive attention is not bad at all but excessively demanding attention which has not been earned is quite problematic.

17. He uses emotional blackmail

Some guys will try to guilt you in an attempt to get you to spend time with them. They resort to emotional blackmail to make you feel bad about wanting to spend time with others and not them.  

18. He begs and bargains for attention

When emotional blackmail doesn’t succeed, they don’t mind begging for your time. He’ll want to bargain and persuade you to stay with him instead of going to other social gatherings. 

19. He’s passive-aggressive 

Using passive aggression as a weapon is not new to any clingy man, he’ll withdraw from you, start ignoring you, or silently become hostile. This technique has probably worked with others, or someone in his past relationship, it’s a way to make his partner feel guilty. 

20. He’s argumentative and absolutely needs to win

It's really unpleasant being around a person who constantly argues about everything. Neediness can also manifest in this way, even people who love being mentally challenged find constant arguments draining. 

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21. He makes over the top gestures

Women love attention and absolutely love gifts. This doesn’t mean that there isn’t a line that should be drawn in this regard. It almost feels like he’s trying to buy your affection instead of earning it. 

22. He chokes you with too much attention 

Yes, there is such a thing as too much attention, and it can be quite choking. A needy man will not hesitate to shower you with all the attention possible so much that it could make you a bit sick.

23. He constantly misses you

It's nice to be missed, it makes women feel special. However, when you’ve spent loads of hours sometimes even straight days with a person and happen to get one hour alone, but they still try to flood you with calls and text messages, it’s not so pleasant. 

24. He doesn’t mind being the third wheel

Men usually hate being the third wheel, they find it uncomfortable and boring. However, cling guys would damn the consequences just to be around you.

25. He’s willing to follow you everywhere

Guys like this won’t mind tagging along even when they’re not invited. It’s nice to have a boyfriend that you can share experiences with, visit places together and all. When he’s constantly shadowing you wherever you go especially without your approval, it’s a major problem. 

26. He interrogates anyone who wants to hang out with you

A little over-protectiveness never hurts anyone especially if you're the type of girl who likes feeling taken care of. However, if when you want to hang out with others, he starts interrogating you, or them, it can become too much.

27. He gets unnecessarily jealous

He gets unnecessarily jealous

A clingy boyfriend wants you all to himself when he sees you with others, he almost feels like you’re cheating on him. He may get annoyingly jealous and insecure quite often which can be a problem especially if you do not like drama.

28. He wants to be involved in everything you do

Every woman would love a supportive boyfriend, someone who’s involved in her interests and life as a whole. Yet, it's not very attractive to have someone who can’t seem to get his nose out of your business.

29. He’s overly dependent 

A clingy man has this unspoken way of communicating co-dependence. His self-confidence and self-image would be dependent on the way you treat him; sometimes even his entire disposition could be affected if things aren’t right between you both.

30. His emotions are dependent on yours

If you notice that he’s only excited and giddy when you are, or he gets upset when you’re in a quiet or withdrawn mood, this often shows that his emotions are fully dependent on yours.  

31. He has no boundaries

Relationships are far more appreciated when both parties have and appreciate boundaries in both their personal and shared lives. A clingy guy believes that he owns your space and time, he’ll do anything to protect that. 

32. They abandon their interests for yours

He may have had plans to hang out with others; friends, colleagues, family, but somehow when you say you’ll be back early, he ditches all that to spend time with you. This can start out as cute until he starts abandoning beneficial things and relationships for you. 

33. They replace their opinions for yours

Needy men are often so eager to please that they are more than willing to exchange their opinions for yours. It's so bad that they could end up losing themselves.

34. He replaces his hobbies for yours

A clingy guy is more likely to jump ship abandoning his opinions for yours. If this continues, you’d notice that his personal and individual view of life, in general, has been completely changed to yours.  

35. He needs constant reassurance from you 

No matter how much effort you put into telling him, and even showing him how much you love and care about him, he’d constantly need verbal assurance from you. 

36. He is more interested in you than you are in them

Most relationships consist of that one person who is a tad more involved than the other person. In some cases, this keeps the relationship going. However, if you're with a needy guy he will make it no secret that he's way more into you than you are in him. 

37. He tries to gain others' respect 

By now I believe we’ve well established that a needy man is not at all self-sufficient. He depends on others to reassure him that he's worthy of anything. He constantly feels the need to voice out his accomplishments to others, he feels more accepted by people this way.  

38. He sometimes puts other people down to make himself look good

There are many similarities between an insecure man and a needy man. Much like an insecure man, a needy man needs other people to validate him. So he would often fall into the temptation of putting other people down to make himself feel good. 

39. He overreacts to other people’s opinions of him

A needy man would often get overly upset or throw a fit over the opinion of others. Since people’s opinions mean so much to them, any negative criticism would extremely sting. 

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40. He loves to talk about other people’s shortcomings

Talking about other people’s setbacks and issues gives a needy man more confidence and self-esteem. Knowing that someone is more weak or flawed than him gives him some form of comfort. 

41. He believes others have character flaws except him 

A needy man could eventually cross the line from being insecure to conceited or delusional. They could tend to criticize or judge others as if they personally have no character flaws.

42. He falls for the halo effect

The halo effect describes a situation where one trait on a person is used to make an overall or complete judgment about that person. Needy guys are usually victims of this, they easily view things from a 2-dimensional point of view.

43. He takes a lot but finds it hard to give except when he’s doing it in exchange for attention or something else

Needy men can be self-gratifying so they’re usually takers, they’ll want to take a lot of your attention, your space, even certain aspects of your life and energy.

44. He constantly wants to know what you’re doing

A needy man is basically a semi-stalker. He‘ll constantly call or text to find out where you are and what you’re doing.

45. He’s constantly giving you too much information

A needy man is the complete opposite of a neglected partner. He’s way too invested in any relationship he is in. He’ll want to know way too much about you and in turn, will offer too much information about himself. 

46. He gets upset when your plans don’t involve him

Leaving him out of a plan or engagement of yours seems to him like you’re stabbing him in the back. He will often get very upset if he finds out that he’s not allowed to tag along.

47. He’s clingy

He’s clingy

It goes without saying that needy men are quite clingy, the attention and presence of their love interest mean the world to them so they try to stick to them for as long as possible sometimes day-in and day-out. 

48. He tries to be overly familiar with your friends and family

It's nice when your spouse is in good and friendly terms with your closest friends and family, but when he starts to force a relationship with the closest people in your life it can get very awkward and uncomfortable.

49. He always insists on paying

Like we’ve mentioned in some of the above points, a needy guy often likes to overcompensate because he's very co-dependent. Most times this may manifest as over-the-top gestures like never allowing you to pay for any shared purchases.

50. He’s very critical of himself and others

A needy man is very self-critical, he's hard on himself and therefore hard on other people. This could make it very hard to relate with them without any friction.

51. He’s a very scared individual

A needy man is constantly afraid of a lot of things, he's scared of losing people’s approval, losing certain relationships, and losing the respect of others.

52. He constantly wants to show you off

A needy man believes that there’s little special about him or his life. Therefore he would often use you or any other seemingly impressive person that is associated with him to make up for his shortcomings. 

53. He’s obsessive

A needy man is quite prone to obsessions and obsessive behavior. It's very hard for them to let go of things said or done. They’re also prone to obsessing over people. 

FAQs

What are the characteristics of a needy person?

A needy person is anyone who's constantly in need of attention or help. They absolutely cannot stand being alone and can be a bit co-dependent. They also tend to be very clingy and don’t understand certain hints to detach.

How do you deal with a needy man?

Though a needy guy may seem to be excessively emotional, the only way you can deal with him in a civil way is, to be honest. Be sure to let him know that his attention is appreciated but that degree of attention is not something you’re used to. He may also need professional help to improve his self-confidence.

How can you tell if a guy is clingy?

If a guy is clingy, he’ll be too engaged in your life and business. He’ll also always feel the need to be around you. In summary, he’ll be excessively attached to you and may even get upset if you ask or demand your own privacy. 

Is being needy a turn-off?

Being needy is a major turn-off. It's extremely unattractive because it shows that he's not confident in himself and has very low self-esteem. Most needy men have this trait because they feel like they’re not a catch and may not be able to attract another woman.

Why are people emotionally needy?

People are emotionally needy when they believe that they are not good enough. Neediness often stems from low self-esteem, low self-respect, depression, or the inability to control and regulate one's feelings independently.

In Conclusion

Needy men may think that all they are doing is showing you love, but that much attention, time, and clinginess can lead to something else. If you can find out why this guy acts like this, or encourage him to see a counselor, it may help him. 

I hope you enjoyed reading through this list, don’t forget to comment below, and share the article with friends and loved ones. 

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Sonya Schwartz
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr "Right" and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here...

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