Have you been on a few dates with someone and you thought it was going great but for some reason, they just don’t seem to want a relationship with you? Maybe they always seem off when you discuss taking things to the next level together? Perhaps you are just confused about the mixed signals this guy is sending you? You might feel like you’re the problem, but I am here to tell you that you have done nothing wrong, and you need to know that. This man might just might simply not be ready for a relationship.
Although this can be difficult news to hear, it might be true. It is also a lot better to know why this man is acting so odd around you and giving you such confusing directions than to be utterly messed up about it. In this article, we are going to take a look at eight of the signs that would prove that this guy doesn’t want to get into a relationship with you. After we’ve had a look at them, we will also take a look at how you can move forward if this is the case.
- 1 1. He doesn’t stick to the plans you have together.
- 2 2. He’s on and off with you.
- 3 3. He doesn’t want to introduce you to his family or friends.
- 4 4. He dismisses all conversation about putting a label on you both.
- 5 5. He never talks about a future that includes you.
- 6 6. He has never fully opened up to you.
- 7 7. All you do is have sex.
- 8 8. You can tell that you’re the one putting in the effort.
- 9 What should you do if you figure out he doesn’t want a relationship with you?
- 10 Conclusion
1. He doesn’t stick to the plans you have together.
If this guy is constantly canceling the plans that you have together or is ignoring your texts when you are supposed to meet each other, this is a big sign that he doesn’t want you. He hasn’t got you as one of his top priorities and quite blatantly thinks you are an option for him. You aren’t an option, you are the only option, and you shouldn’t have to feel like this.
When someone wants to be with you, they will show you that by always making time for you, and never canceling on your plans, unless something really important comes up for them.
2. He’s on and off with you.
When someone doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you, communicating with you isn’t their biggest priority, so they won’t dedicate a lot of time to it. It’s probably pretty obvious that someone doesn’t want you if they don’t speak to you. However, it can be even worse if sometimes he gives you his full attention and showers you with affection but then ignores you for a week. What he’s trying to do is keep you around, in case he wants to see you or talk to you.
When someone wants to be with you, they will want to speak to you all the time. They will probably message you every day to just see how you are and what you are doing. They are interested in your life, and even when you aren’t around, they want to know how you are doing. They also won’t be on and off with you, they will only ever be interested. If someone is romantically interested in you, they will show this in any way and every way they can.
3. He doesn’t want to introduce you to his family or friends.
If this man doesn’t want a relationship with you, he will not make an effort to introduce you to the rest of his life. He will keep his personal life and you very separate. You will never meet his friend or family, and he won’t plan on you doing so any time soon. If you bring it up that you would like to meet his friends and family, he will probably shut it down straight away. He will make excuses for it not to happen.
When someone is interested in you and wants to be in a relationship with you, they will want you to meet their friends and family as soon as possible. Of course, they will probably be nervous about it, but they will still want it to happen if they think that you will be together for the long-run. They will also want to meet and impress your friends and family because they will care about the people that you care about.
4. He dismisses all conversation about putting a label on you both.
When someone doesn’t want a relationship, they will clearly not want to put a label on the relationship that they share with you. You will be able to notice this if he constantly dismisses any kind of conversation about what the two of you are actually classed as. Perhaps you have asked him what’s really going on between the two of you or even said simply, “What are we?”. He will completely shut down this question and he might do this in several ways. He might try and distract you by pulling you in for a kiss, or by trying to change the conversation swiftly. He might also act like you’re scaring him by asking such committed questions, suggesting that you are moving way too fast for him. This is a really easy way for him to blame you for him shutting down.
When someone really likes you and wants to be in a relationship with you, they will always want to put a label on the two of you. They want to be with you, so they will be keen on making it known to the world that the two of you are an item, even if you aren’t quite yet in a committed relationship. A man that wants you would never feel scared of the question of, “What are we?” because he will be thinking the same thing.
5. He never talks about a future that includes you.
If this man isn’t interested in being in a relationship with you, you will notice that if and when he speaks about future plans, you aren’t included in them. That’s because he genuinely doesn’t see you with him in the future, and his subconscious might be telling you that, without him even realizing that he is saying everything with such a single outlook. When you ask about the future, he will try to change the subject. He might even tell you about his future plans but never ask you about yours. They probably won’t include you in their plans for the next week, never mind the next few months. This is a sure sign that this man does not want to be with you and he is only thinking of himself.
When a man is interested in you and wants to be with you, he will always include you when speaking about the future. He will also be really interested in finding out what your goals and aspirations are for the future, not only to see how his align with yours but to figure out what kind of life the two of you might have when you are together. He will speak about the future to show you that he’s serious about being with you for a long time.
6. He has never fully opened up to you.
If a man doesn’t see a future with you, he won’t open up to you. He won’t show his vulnerability to you, because he doesn’t think it’s worth opening up to you because you are not special to him. He doesn’t see you as a long-term thing, so why would he even bother opening up and showing himself to you. You might notice that it always feels like he is distant from you and that he isn’t being real with you. He won’t ever open up with his emotions, he will always be playing cool and calm. He also won’t be telling you a lot about him, so you will never really get to know the heart under the exterior. If someone isn’t opening up, it’s because they don’t see you as the kind of person they can open up to, and this isn’t because of something you have done wrong, it’s because they don’t want to open up to someone they don’t really care about.
When a man is falling in love with you and wants to be with you, he will always make an effort to open up to you and show his vulnerable side. Of course, it might take a little while for him to open up, but once he does you will see a completely different side to him, and he will want to show you it. He will open up to you so that you know he is serious about you, and he trusts you with his emotions and past memories. He will also want to know all about you, especially things like how your childhood was and how you feel about certain things.
7. All you do is have sex.
This doesn’t sound like the worst thing in the world, but if all you are doing together is having sex, it could be because he doesn’t really want to spend time with you doing anything else. He might love how you are in the bedroom, but he probably doesn’t have a lot of time for you outside of it. This is a sure sign that this man is not crazy into you and he doesn’t want to pursue a relationship with you. He is simply still seeing you to get into your pants, and this isn’t what the beginning of a budding relationship should be like. Think about the last few times you have seen this guy, did you have sex every time? Have you ever met up with him to purely spend time with each other?
When a man is into you and wants to be in a relationship with you, of course, the two of you will still probably have sex, but you will also spend a lot of time outside of the bedroom getting to know each other. He will want to know much more about you than what your favorite position is. He will make an effort to take you on dates and get to know not just your body, but your mind too. Anyone can have sex but getting to love someone for who they really are is a completely different matter.
8. You can tell that you’re the one putting in the effort.
Does he ever message you first? Does he think of reasons you should both meet up and spend time together? If the answer to both of these questions is no, it’s because he probably doesn’t want to make an effort with you. This sounds really harsh, and I don’t want it to, but it’s probably the truth. Are you the one that always has to arrange meeting up with him? If so, this is wrong.
When a man is interested in you, he will make an effort to organize the two of you meeting and he will usually always message you first. In a healthy relationship, you will both make the same effort to see each other and talk. So, if you are the one putting in all the effort here, it’s probably because this is a one-sided thing, he doesn’t feel strongly for you and he certainly doesn’t want to get into a relationship with you.
What should you do if you figure out he doesn’t want a relationship with you?
I’m so sorry if you have realized that you are interested in someone that doesn’t want a relationship with you. Unrequited feelings can be really hard to deal with, but you will deal with it and move forward a happier and more experienced person in the world of love. We are now going to go on and speak about how you should move forward with a situation like this.
1. Leave him.
This is understandably a difficult thing to do, especially if you really like him. However, you need to leave him. He doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you and you aren’t going to change that, no matter what you do. You deserve someone that wants to be with you just as much as you want to be with them, and the only way you will find someone like that is by leaving this man behind. You don’t need to explain your reasons for wanting to call things off with him, just make sure you get out of that situation so you can start to heal and move on.
2. Make sure you take time away from them.
After you have ended things with them, it’s a good idea for you to take some time away from them. The main reason for this is to protect yourself, from not only going back to him but also from seeing him with other people. There is a high chance that this guy could be a player, and he might be messing around with other girls too. This is the last thing you want to see, so just make sure you take some space away from him for a while until you are over him.
3. Look after yourself.
After coming out of a situation like this where you might feel rejected or unloved, you need to start loving yourself more. Make sure that you are looking out for yourself more than usual at this time. Spend time alone doing things you like. Treat yourself and start to work on loving yourself more. You will come out of this situation a more wholesome individual with higher self-esteem than ever.
4. Open your heart again.
Once you have come to terms with the fact that this man was just the wrong guy and that’s why he didn’t want to be in a relationship with you, it’s time to get yourself back out there into the mysterious and wonderful world of love. You can go out with an open heart, knowing that there are so many people out there that would kill to be in a relationship with you. You will end up with the perfect person for you and realize that this guy was just a bump on the road to finding your true love. Also, you now have the added bonus knowledge of being able to spot a guy that doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you going forward, so you will never fall for someone that doesn’t see a future with you ever again.
I really hope that this article has helped you to recognize some of the signs that a man will show if he doesn’t want a relationship with you. If you have confirmed that the man you are into at the moment doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you, don’t be disheartened. He is clearly not the one for you, and you can look at it in a positive light – you are closer to finding the one.
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You may also be interested in: 3 Easy Ways to Find Out If He's Cheating On You