“Every long-term relationship is static and never changes.”, said no one ever! With that in mind, I would urge you to put social media relationship branding aside and relate to this truth: Every relationship goes through changes. It could be moving in together to a new apartment, losing a job, the coming of children, or even losing a close family member or friend.
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When you first met each other, it was love at first sight. The chemistry was superheated. You could barely keep your hands off each other. The sex was great, and it went on whenever you wanted.
Marriage happened, and after the honeymoon phase (which is usually the time the rose-tinted spectacles with which you view the world comes off), everything suddenly seems so dull. So you see, change must happen, especially at various stages in life, your love will take on a new direction as it stands the test of time.
People evolve, and with this evolution, spring new ideas, attitudes, behaviors, and mindsets, which may be overwhelming to deal with, especially in your partner. Here are some tips on how to cope with changes.
Romantic love is driven by hormones. However, a time is definitely going to come when these reactions will die out. Then the couple will have to move onto the next level of love which involves emotional attachment to each other. To think the fireworks and romance will stay as it began, means you are spending too much time in fairytale land.
You can, therefore, save yourself a lot of trouble by understanding that changes are bound to transpire in any long-term romantic relationship. This is the first step to dealing with change. This expectation somehow gives you a ready mindset to work through whatever change may be happening and allows you to look for a solution rather than exit the union at the slightest change in your partner.
During periods of change, it is prudent to stay around people who love you. This gives couples a chance to understand the value of the relationships better, no matter how cordial. It also allows you to appreciate the love you are receiving (both from family and friends), to extend that love to one another, and work through the alterations happening.
It is effortless to worry yourself sick with the change taking place, and therefore neglect yourself in the process. Even though change can be unsettling for couples, give yourselves the much-needed treatment.
Take a break if you have to, visit a spa, get that massage, go on that romantic vacation trip. Take care of yourself. The importance of this is to preserve your mind as you go through this process and not lose yourself while at it.
During a time of transition in your relationship, pick yourself up and focus on yourself. This is also the time for you to re-evaluate yourself. Ask yourself the critical questions needed for growth in whatever you have endeavored to do about the situation at hand. What do you stand for? Are you doing what you have proposed to do? If yes, how are you going about it?
If no, why not? If you are, where are the results to show for your work? Are these results enough to show what you have targeted? The answers to these questions and more you may allow you to know yourself better, learn new things, discover your strengths and work on an achievable target, especially on a life together with your significant other.
Change, no matter how good or bad can be hard to deal with. And while you and your partner are bearing the brunt, it will help things a lot if kindness reigned in the relationship. So, first of all, you need to be kind to yourself, so that you can extend that kindness to your spouse.
While it will not instantly solve the situation at hand, it will create the right environment, which allows for trust. And in the long-run, positively affect the outcome of the change that may be happening. One way you can be kind to your partner is through the use of words. Mind the choice of your words so that you do not unintentionally sound offensive.
Communication is vital in every relationship. Therefore as couples, it is only right you both talk about the transition taking place. You both ought to talk about how you are being affected by those changes present, see through your differences, find realistic solutions to the issue at hand. This will create room for progress and commitment during this period. Once these two qualities are in the picture, you can go through this transition on a good note.
No two persons are the same, and that means we all adapt to new situations differently. While that is understandable, you ought to be flexible and attempt to learn. Adaptability can be a strength once adopted because life is full of changes, so the faster you learn to adapt, the easier and more comfortable it gets for you and your partner. However, everyone adapts at their own pace, so as you adjust, remember to exercise patience for yourself and your partner as you go through the transition process.
Firstly, understand that life is full of constant change and your relationship is bound to go through it too. That’s the first threshold to cross concerning this dilemma. Also, in the transition process, do not neglect yourself. Be kind to you and your spouse. Spend time with family and friends to better appreciate love, be communicative with your spouse, and lastly, learn to adapt to these changes taking place.
Women are known to be the emotional gender; however, emotions such as love, fear, or worry can cause a man to change in a relationship. Other factors that can cause a man to change in the union include fatherhood, maturity, and insecurity.
Yes, this life is full of events that leave their mark on people so that a partner can change.
Yes, it is normal for relationships to change. No lasting relationship is the same as it began. Events happen and leave in their wake changes.
The blame game and tuning out kills a relationship faster, in addition to lack of sex. These two attitudes leave no room for communication, willingness to adapt, and commitment, thereby rapidly ending the relationship a couple has.
In a nutshell, the only thing constant in our lives is change, and it is definite that it is bound to happen to every couple, no matter the difference in the relationship.
The best you can do as a wife or girlfriend is to equip yourself enough to sail through all the stages or phases smoothly. And I hope these tips will effectively guide you to deal with any change you may encounter in your relationship.
If you enjoyed reading this article, kindly leave a comment below and share the post with others who might need a little help to get through each stage and phase of their relationship.